AITAH for refusing to lend money for ex-girlfriends brothers funeral hair?

AITAH for refusing to lend my ex $100 for her brother's funeral hairdo? Reddit users discuss boundaries and social expectations in this tricky situation.

Damjan

Published in Interesting
18 Nov 2025

AITAH for refusing to lend money for ex-girlfriends brothers funeral hair?

In today’s discussion, we dive into a rather thought-provoking Reddit thread that raises questions about boundaries, obligations, and the complexities of past relationships. The original poster shares an experience involving their ex-girlfriend, who recently reached out for financial help to get her hair done for her brother's funeral.

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This request, however, comes on the heels of a previous loan that she took a considerable time to repay, leading to a mix of emotions and opinions from the Reddit community. As the narrative unfolds, it becomes clear that this isn't just a simple matter of lending money; it opens the door to deeper conversations about the expectations we have of one another after a relationship ends.

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Many commenters have weighed in, questioning the appropriateness of the request and whether it's reasonable for the ex-girlfriend to seek help from someone she once dated. With responses ranging from empathetic to critical, the thread touches on the nuances of maintaining relationships with ex-partners and what role financial assistance plays in those dynamics.

It begs the question: how should one navigate the tricky waters of past relationships, especially when it comes to matters of support and boundaries?

Original Post

She has an ex-husband/ father of her son from before we met and another father of a different son from after we broke up in 2019. But she borrowed 300 for two weeks on August 5th of 2024 and didn’t pay me back in full until October 18th.

Her brother passed away last Sunday Nov 3rd and she wanted to get her hair fixed up before the funeral on the following Saturday Nov 9th. I told her that I didn’t have $100, in the hopes that she would borrow it from someone else.