Should I Go to Work When Not on Schedule? AITA for Refusing Bosss Requests?
"Is my boss manipulating my work schedule and guilt-tripping me into extra shifts? AITA for not going in when I'm not on the schedule? 🤔"

Are you the jerk for refusing to work when you're not on the schedule, even if your boss insists you come in? Picture this: you're a 20-year-old working at Food Lion, specifically in the HBC department, with a set schedule of Sundays, Tuesdays, and Fridays from 7 pm to 3 am.
Without a car, you rely on a coworker for rides as you both share similar schedules. But here's the twist - every Wednesday, your boss claims you're supposed to work, even though it's not on your schedule.
This recurring situation has left you feeling uneasy, especially after learning about your boss's history of sketchy hour management with previous employees. Despite your boss's persistence, you're determined not to be guilt-tripped into working when it's not officially scheduled.
The lack of clear communication from your boss adds to the frustration, prompting you to seek advice on whether you're in the wrong for standing your ground. Reddit users are quick to support you, suggesting tactics like taking photos of the schedule, documenting all interactions, and escalating the issue if needed.
The consensus is clear - prioritize your rights, protect yourself, and don't let a shady manager disrupt your work-life balance. Share your thoughts and experiences - are you really the jerk in this scenario?
Original Post
So I (20f) work at Food Lion. I work in the HBC department and work mainly Sunday’s, Tuesday’s, and Friday’s 7pm-3am.
I don’t have a car so I have a coworker drive me to work since we work mainly the same schedule. Ive worked here for almost 2 months and my manager for my department has been pulling the same thing since I got hired.
Every time the schedule for the next week comes out on Friday’s i check it. I work the same three days.
But for the last couple of weeks my boss texts me every Wednesday (I don’t work Wednesdays) and tells me im supposed to be in That day. First time it happened im like, “okay, she must have changed the schedule and didnt tell me.
I’ll go in and check just in case” I go in and check im not on there. She swears up and down she out me on and I shrug it off.
Must have been a mistake Second time it happens, not on the schedule for Wednesday and I even check in with her to make sure it wasn’t a mistake and she said she didn’t have the hours for me. Wednesday rolls around and she tells me I was supposed to be in that night?
Third time happened today. I checked the schedule on Friday and I made sure I wasn’t on for Wednesday.
She texts me today, “did you find a ride for tomorrow since (said coworker) isnt working?” I tell her “I checked the schedule on Friday and it said I wasn’t supposed to be in tomorrow, and my parents are out of town so I don’t have anyone to take me up there” she swears up and down that she put me on the schedule so tonight when I go in I will check. If I do happen to be on the schedule that means she changed it and didn’t tell me.
If that happened then I will politely tell her that if she changes my schedule then she needs to tell me so I can check and confirm If im not on the schedule then I am simply not going in, and since im not officially on the schedule it won’t count against me as a no call no show. She had been accused of stealing hours from the last HBC girl who worked before me because she asks them to come in when Theyre not on the schedule and doesn’t put in the hours correctly.
So I don’t want to go in and trust her with manually putting in my hours. And according to other managers she doesn’t communicate with her employees properly (clearly) which causes issues that could have been avoided But I also don’t want her to keep guilt tripping me into coming in when clearly there is a pattern here that makes me feel uneasy.
So AITA? And any advice would be great
Understanding Work Manipulation
Dr. Rebecca Allen, an organizational psychologist, highlights that manipulation in the workplace can create toxic environments.
Her research emphasizes how guilt-tripping employees often leads to resentment and decreased job satisfaction.
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Studies in Occupational Health Psychology suggest that individuals who feel manipulated are more likely to experience burnout and disengagement from their roles.
This can lead to a cycle of low morale and high turnover rates within organizations.
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The Psychology of Guilt and Obligation
Guilt can be a powerful motivator, but it can also lead to unhealthy work dynamics.
Research indicates that when employees feel obligated to work beyond their scheduled hours, it can result in emotional exhaustion.
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To combat this, experts recommend establishing clear work boundaries and communicating them to supervisors.
Setting a defined schedule and sticking to it can help maintain a healthy work-life balance.
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Identifying and Addressing Workplace Stress
Workplace stress can significantly impact mental health, affecting both productivity and personal well-being.
Studies show that recognizing stressors and addressing them proactively can lead to a healthier work environment.
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Employers should foster a culture that encourages open feedback and discussion about workload and expectations.
This can help employees feel more empowered and reduce feelings of manipulation or guilt.
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What are your thoughts on this situation? Share your perspective in the comments below.
Expert Opinion
This scenario illustrates how manipulative tactics can undermine employee morale and engagement.
It's critical for employees to recognize their rights and advocate for a healthy work-life balance to prevent burnout.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches
In conclusion, navigating workplace dynamics requires awareness of both personal boundaries and organizational culture.
According to workplace psychology resources, clear communication and boundary-setting can alleviate stress and enhance job satisfaction.