AITA for backing out of buying a colleagues car last minute?

It started with a sweet deal, a coworker offering a 2012 Jeep Limited Edition 70th Anniversary for €8k, and a payment plan that sounded way easier than buying a car outright.

But the timeline fell apart. March 1 came and went, the Jeep still was not in OP’s hands, and the reason kept shifting to “waiting on the company car” from the employer that was supposed to make everything line up. OP, who only had a couple thousand euros saved, panicked at the idea of taking on a huge financial responsibility and backed out over WhatsApp instead of in person.

Now it’s a full workplace feud, and OP is wondering if backing out last-minute made them the a*****e.

Original Post

Hello everyone so at the end of January I was looking to get a car for myself since I don't have one and it helps having a car where I live because public transport in a small town is almost non existent. So a colleague of mine at work offered to sell me his Jeep 2012 Limited Edition 70th Anniversary for €8k with 230k KM on it because he was offered a employer car from the place I work at.

He would let me pay €2.5k first month and then pay in installments, he said on the 1st March I would have the Jeep in my hands, 1st March comes and goes and still no car and he said he was still waiting for the company car to be delivered to him. After dwelling on buying a car for €8k I decided to not go through with it and sent him a message on Whatsapp because Im a anxious person who cannot give bad news face to face.

Told him that I really appreciated his offer and to let me pay in installments but decided to not buy because it would be a huge financial responsability when I don't have much money in savings. Only a couple thousand euros.

I was hit with " I had to refuse to sell to my brother because of you, if you can't assume responsabilities don't assume them. " I sent a reply saying that he was right and that I was really sorry.

With his final message being " Apologies are not said, they are avoided " Am I the a*****e for doing this?

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This is similar to the AITA fight over refusing to split a cherished heirloom bracelet.

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When the March 1 handoff never happened, OP’s coworker kept blaming the employer delivery, and the Jeep deal started to feel like a moving target.

Instead of confronting him face to face, OP sent the “I’m backing out” message on WhatsApp, which is exactly how the coworker decided to take it personally.

The coworker then snapped that he had to refuse to sell to his brother because of OP, turning a casual car offer into a chain reaction.

With the final line, “Apologies are not said, they are avoided,” OP is left stuck between feeling anxious and feeling guilty.</p>

Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section.

He might be happier with a different plan, because nobody wants to be the reason someone missed out on selling a car to their brother.

Wondering if you should stand firm like the parent who defended unconventional methods at a family dinner? Read the AITA about unconventional parenting and heated dinner backlash.