Bride Sets A ‘No Plus Ones’ Rule At Her Wedding, Now No One Wants To Accept Her Invitation

A wedding is intended to be a once-in-a-lifetime occasion, so the individuals in charge of planning are under great pressure to ensure that everything goes as smoothly as possible. It's not uncommon for families and friends to get into disagreements over the details of a wedding because everyone is under so much pressure to make everything perfect.

As a bride, you feel entitled to have the final say on all decisions because it's your big day, and why shouldn't you? Of course, such a day needs to be perfect and just the way you envisioned it in your imagination.

Indeed, the power is all yours, but don't be upset if someone declines to attend your wedding because they feel your decisions will create an uncomfortable environment for them. I mean, you deserve to be happy, but if your happiness encroaches on another person's comfort, they can choose to step back.

In the case of Reddit user TAplusonedrama, who is getting married, she chose not to apply the plus-one tradition. This means that only those who receive an invitation can attend.

Unfortunately, this rule ended up backfiring, as several people rejected her invitation. Now the bride feels aggrieved that numerous individuals no longer want to attend, even though it's within their rights to choose whether or not to come.

However, Redditors believe that it is not the bride's responsibility to insist that someone attends the reception.

This bride is upset that several people are declining her invitation

an iconoclast (not the actual photo)

OP and her fiancé want their wedding to be a joyous occasion, so they've established a few ground rules to help make it so. They insist that attendees must have an invitation to participate in their big day.

In keeping with wedding protocol, guests who are married, engaged, or living together as a couple are expected to bring a plus one to the festivities. Alternatively, other visitors may be permitted to bring people to ensure that they are not uncomfortable, but these traditions are not mandatory, and you don't need to adhere to them.

"AITA for my reasons of no plus ones on my wedding, causing several people not to attend?"

TAplusonedrama

If a guest wants to bring a companion, the OP has a few rules to follow

TAplusonedrama

That person must be well-known to the bride and groom and must be in their good graces

TAplusonedrama

According to the OP, she will allow guests to bring a plus one if they are acquaintances of hers and her fiancé; if they have a close enough relationship that they would enjoy dining with them; if they would receive a separate invitation; and if the guest is a friend of hers. Even if the guest is married, engaged, or in a committed long-term relationship, their significant other will not be permitted to accompany them if they do not meet the requirements.

Although this may not seem fair to some people, it is their decision if they want only their closest friends and family to attend.

The list goes on

TAplusonedrama

The rules imply that married guests and those who have been together for a long time aren't automatically entitled to bring their companions

TAplusonedrama

It's understandable that some people turned down the invitation since they don't want to attend a celebration without their significant other.

One of the biggest shocks the bride received was when her cousin declined her invitation. The cousin, who has been engaged to his fiancée for a year, was disappointed that he couldn't bring his partner to the wedding.

The strict rules definitely upset several expected guests

TAplusonedrama TAplusonedrama

The OP's primary grievance was the absence of her cousin, who refused to go without his fiancée

TAplusonedrama

Neither the OP's fiancé nor the bride-to-be has had the opportunity to meet the woman; thus, she wasn't invited. However, the OP still wanted her cousin to attend and expressed her disappointment that he couldn't leave his fiancée for a few hours to celebrate her big day.

The cousin became furious and argued that being apart from his fiancée wasn't the problem because they go on separate trips and have distinct social circles. However, he was concerned about the disrespect he felt and the exclusion of his long-term companion.

The OP's cousin made it clear that she was being "extremely disrespectful." In defense, she said that he was the one being disrespectful by not attending her wedding

TAplusonedrama TAplusonedrama

"Those are the rules."

TAplusonedrama

He also knew that because it was the OP's big day, he had no hope of altering her mind, which is why he backed down. Upon his admission, the OP immediately intervened, pleading with him to show respect for them by attending their wedding.

Redditors were irked by the bride's attempt to coerce her cousin into coming to the wedding, which many viewed as a form of bullying. Moreover, they sided with the cousin since if a visitor refuses to attend a wedding because he or she doesn't like the rules, the event organizers should accept it, as the guest showed respect by not infringing those restrictions.

The consensus was that guests should have the freedom to accept or reject an invitation if the bride and groom have the authority to decide who can and cannot attend their wedding.

She now wonders if she might be wrong and inquires as to whether her reasons for refusing to accept plus ones are irrational

TAplusonedrama

The Bride decided to respond to questions in the comments

rocksee (not the actual photo)

After the OP reacted to a few comments, it became evident why she thought her cousin was making such a big fuss. It turns out that she experienced something similar in the past and didn't take it the wrong way.

In the past, one friend of my fiancé got married, and I hadn’t met him, so I wasn’t invited. I wasn’t mad.

His refusal to attend was seen as insulting since;

He cares more about some moment of discomfort rather than supporting his cousin. Of course, he has an option; I don’t disagree with that. But that decision could also be disrespectful of him, no?

Most of the people in the comments weren't concerned by OP's wedding rules, but the way she responded when her relative declined her invitation annoyed them

via Reddit

"I'd decline too"

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The "Take it or leave it" response to her cousin didn't sit well with a lot of people

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"YTA for insisting he come"

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"What people will remember about your wedding is your rules"

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"Weird rules to begin with"

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"You are entitled to have your rules, but that comes with the expectation and acknowledgment that people are allowed to not attend due to said rules"

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"This is insufferable"

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In this situation, trying to persuade someone is nearly impossible because both parties have their own sentiments. However, if you were to look at this situation objectively, who would you say is to blame here?

What do you think of the bride's rules? Do you think the cousin is being selfish by not attending her own wedding?

Let us know in the comments!