Dog Breeder Regrets Selling Dog to Her Best Friend Who Can't Seem to Afford Pet Ownership

Don't mix business with pleasure. This saying is especially important to keep in mind when you're considering selling a dog to a friend.

Over at the "Today I F*cked Up" (TIFU) subreddit, a dog breeder is regretting her decision to sell her dog to her best friend. She's having trouble collecting the payment installments they agreed upon.

The breeder had a litter born via emergency C-section. One puppy is special needs, another went to the male dog's owner, and the third was meant for her best friend, who had just lost her dog the day before the puppies were born.

The issues started with the deposit. The friend kept delaying payment, making excuses about her son's contribution and eventually about her upcoming knee surgery.

The breeder tried to be patient but had to repeatedly ask for the deposit. After the surgery was rescheduled, the friend finally paid.

The breeder set up a payment plan, but the friend continued to delay payments as she was facing various emergencies, including her cat’s unexpected surgery and her own health issues. Despite these excuses, the breeder found herself constantly having to ask for payments, which were only made after much delay.

The breeder is now torn. She worries that her friend won't be able to afford to properly care for the puppy.

If she finds a new buyer, it will likely strain their friendship, but continuing as things are will lead to resentment. The breeder is at a crossroads, trying to decide what's best for the puppy and their friendship.

The original poster (OP) shares how she regrets selling her puppy to her friend.

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The OP had to shell out money to pay for her dog's emergency C-section.

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Friendship Dynamics and Financial Responsibility

Dr. Jenna Davis, a social psychologist at the University of Toronto, explains that financial responsibility plays a significant role in friendship dynamics. When it comes to shared responsibilities like pet ownership, differences in financial capability can lead to conflict. Her research indicates that feelings of obligation and guilt may arise when one friend perceives another as unable to meet their responsibilities, complicating the friendship.

This situation can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration, especially if one party feels taken advantage of.

She shares how she plans to distribute the puppies.

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Selling a dog to one of her best friends turned out to be problematic.

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Studies in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships emphasize that financial issues are a common source of conflict in friendships. When individuals fail to communicate their financial situations openly, misunderstandings can arise, potentially damaging the relationship. This highlights the importance of transparency in maintaining healthy friendships.

She had to keep following up with her friend for the payment.

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Every time she asks for the payment, the friend would be full of excuses.

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The Role of Empathy in Friendship Conflicts

Empathy is crucial in navigating conflicts around responsibilities. A psychologist specializing in interpersonal relationships notes that when friends can empathize with each other's situations, it fosters understanding and collaborative problem-solving. Research indicates that empathy can significantly reduce conflict and enhance relationship satisfaction.

Practicing empathy involves recognizing the challenges each friend faces and validating their feelings, which can lead to more constructive conversations.

The friend's home situation:

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The OP needs the money because the expenses went beyond what she expected.

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Additionally, establishing open communication about expectations and obligations is vital. Experts recommend having candid discussions about responsibilities and financial capabilities to avoid misunderstandings. This proactive approach can help clarify roles and foster a sense of partnership in shared responsibilities.

She also tells the community that people in legitimate breeding programs don't earn a lot of money.

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This is a business transaction, so it's natural for the OP to expect payment when it's due.

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Strategies for Managing Shared Responsibilities

To manage shared responsibilities effectively, friends should consider creating a written agreement outlining each person's obligations regarding pet care and financial contributions. This document can serve as a reference point and reduce ambiguity in the friendship. Regular check-ins about the arrangement can also help address any concerns before they escalate into conflicts.

Involving all parties in these discussions fosters a sense of teamwork and shared accountability in the friendship.

The OP didn't want to bug her friend post-surgery, so she wanted to sort it out soon.

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But the surgery didn't happen on the day it was scheduled.

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The OP should have known better than to enter into a business transaction with a friend. Now, she's already seeing the outcome of her decision.

She really needs the money, so she should have looked for a buyer who could pay in full or in installments according to a payment schedule.

The OP then sets a payment schedule with her friend.

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The friend then confirmed that she'll be sending the payment on a specific day.

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Unfortunately, the money did not arrive.

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Things weren't looking good because the friend's cat also had to undergo surgery.

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This is turning into a real headache for the OP with all the constant follow-ups.

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The OP feels that she's being guilt-tripped.

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She gently reminded her friend that this is business.

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After all the stressful follow-ups, the OP is seriously considering finding a new buyer.

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The OP is aware that whether she finds a new buyer or not, their friendship will be strained.

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Selling the pup to her friend was simply a bad decision.

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She is now compelled to look for a new buyer.

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The OP should indeed find a new buyer for the sake of her friend.

After knee surgery and her cat's surgery, an energetic puppy wouldn't fit their lifestyle.

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The OP should have been strict from the very beginning, even if it was her friend who was buying.

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Overall, it's a bad idea to do business with a friend.

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Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the complexities of financial responsibility in friendships. When one person feels burdened by another's inability to meet obligations, it can create tension and resentment. Open communication and empathy are crucial in resolving these issues and maintaining healthy relationships.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Navigating friendship dynamics requires a balance of empathy and open communication, especially when it comes to shared responsibilities. Research suggests that addressing financial obligations transparently can enhance relationship satisfaction and prevent misunderstandings. By fostering a collaborative environment, friends can strengthen their bond while managing shared responsibilities more effectively.