Bride-To-Be Exiles Dad From Wedding For Abandoning Family And Secretly Tying Knot With His Mistress

“No way I’m letting that traitor walk me down the aisle!”

Let's dive into the tangled tale of one 26-year-old bride-to-be grappling with a dilemma as old as time itself—daddy drama.

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Our narrator (Original Poster) had a relationship with her dad that was as rocky as a mountain trail. You see, he had a bit of a track record: two infidelities, one illegitimate child, and a history of shattering her trust to bits.

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The first blow came when he cheated on her mom when she was just a toddler. The result? A stepsister. The second case of infidelity happened when her mom was pregnant with her little brother. At that point, OP officially gave up, and her mom followed suit and kicked him out.

Despite these rocky beginnings, OP’s dad once played the role of the world's best father. He visited daily and showed genuine concern even after the split, but his enthusiasm gradually waned—even paying alimony became a huge problem.

Two years later, the final ball dropped when OP’s mom revealed that her dad was marrying his mistress. OP, ever the calm and collected one, waited for her invitation—but it never came.

She confronted him six months after the wedding, only to be met with a nervous explanation and a surprise introduction to his new wife on her 18th birthday. That was the final straw.

Now, OP’s wedding was four months away, and she made it clear her dad wasn’t welcome. Her mom argued it was a childish grudge; even her fiancé believed she was overreacting.

As her big day approached, the question remained: was she the jerk for not inviting her dad?

The story in detail

The story in detailReddit.com
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OP and her father had an awkward relationship due to her father's infidelity. The affair resulted in a child, which led to OP’s mom kicking him out of the house.

OP and her father had an awkward relationship due to her father's infidelity. The affair resulted in a child, which led to OP’s mom kicking him out of the house.Reddit.com
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The Impact of Parental Relationships on Adult Decisions

Dr. Mark Schwartz, a psychologist at the University of California, Berkeley, emphasizes the long-lasting impact of parental relationships on adult decision-making.

His research indicates that unresolved feelings towards parental figures can significantly influence one's choices in critical life events.

This bride's decision to exclude her father from her wedding likely stems from deeper issues related to abandonment and betrayal.

After leaving home, OP’s dad rarely came to visit her, and when he did, he always mentioned he had no money to pay more child support.

After leaving home, OP’s dad rarely came to visit her, and when he did, he always mentioned he had no money to pay more child support.Reddit.com

OP’s dad got married to his mistress without informing her. However, during OP’s birthday, her dad decided to introduce his new wife to her, which made her uncomfortable.

OP’s dad got married to his mistress without informing her. However, during OP’s birthday, her dad decided to introduce his new wife to her, which made her uncomfortable.Reddit.com

Studies in developmental psychology suggest that unresolved childhood trauma can manifest in adult relationships.

According to research published in the Journal of Abnormal Psychology, individuals often recreate familiar patterns from their childhood in their adult relationships.

This cycle can lead to repeated emotional pain unless addressed through therapeutic intervention.

OP intends to get married without inviting her dad. However, her mom thinks her dad should be invited to such a special event.

OP intends to get married without inviting her dad. However, her mom thinks her dad should be invited to such a special event.Reddit.com

We gathered the most interesting upvoted comments from the Reddit community:

We gathered the most interesting upvoted comments from the Reddit community:Reddit.com

Trauma Responses in Family Dynamics

Understanding trauma responses is vital in deciphering complex family dynamics.

Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, an expert in trauma research, highlights how unresolved trauma can lead individuals to protect themselves by distancing from those who have hurt them.

This bride's decision may reflect a self-protective strategy to avoid further emotional pain.

“He was a doo-doo of a dad, and that is a type of abandonment.”

“He was a doo-doo of a dad, and that is a type of abandonment.”Reddit.com

“While it may not fit the traditional definition of abandonment, it very much was a type of abandonment, a very real type.”

“While it may not fit the traditional definition of abandonment, it very much was a type of abandonment, a very real type.”Reddit.com

Redditors backed OP up with a solid NTA verdict. They agreed her mom was right about one thing—she wasn’t a child anymore. That meant she had the right to make her own decisions.

After all, her dad excluded her from his own wedding. The consensus? Stick to your decision, OP, and enjoy a drama-free wedding!

Do you agree with this verdict? Let us know in the comments.

“You aren't an AH, but you should consider therapy.”

“You aren't an AH, but you should consider therapy.”Reddit.com

“Your mom is wrong; you can exclude him from such an important event in your life.”

“Your mom is wrong; you can exclude him from such an important event in your life.”Reddit.com

Therapeutic approaches like trauma-informed therapy can help individuals work through these feelings.

Research indicates that creating a safe space for discussing painful memories can lead to healing and reconnection.

For those facing similar situations, seeking therapy can be an essential step towards understanding and processing familial relationships.

“It's the father's job to keep the father-child relationship stable. It's not your responsibility to fix what he broke.”

“It's the father's job to keep the father-child relationship stable. It's not your responsibility to fix what he broke.”Reddit.com

Psychological Analysis

This scenario reflects a profound emotional struggle rooted in past familial relationships.

From a psychological perspective, it's essential to explore how these dynamics influence current decisions and to consider therapeutic avenues for healing and reconciliation.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, examining the psychological factors at play in this case reveals a deeper narrative of unresolved emotional wounds.

Research underscores the importance of addressing trauma to foster healthier family dynamics and relationships.

Ultimately, understanding these underlying factors can lead to more informed decisions regarding familial connections.

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