New Mom Angry at Her Best Friend Because She Keeps Calling Her Out but Never Wants to Come Over to Her Place Because of the Baby
They've been seeing each other less and less, even though they live on the same street.
When you become a parent, your social life naturally takes a bit of a hit. After all, it can be pretty hard to catch up with friends when there's a tiny human that needs your attention 24/7.
Plus, after you've had kids and experienced the joy, tiredness, and stress that come with little ones, hanging out with those without children suddenly feels like visiting another planet entirely.
But while we're sure our kids are grateful we no longer make as much time for our friends, socializing is still something that's important to us all as parents — so at least earmark one evening or weekend brunch in your schedule every month!
Having children doesn't mean you have to sacrifice socializing with your friends—although it may not feel like you get as much time to spend together. With a little bit of planning and creativity, it's totally possible to maintain a strong relationship with your buddies, even when you'll have to leave the party early for a babysitter!
Life passes so quickly. So make sure you take every opportunity you have to celebrate time spent with good people!
Today's post will look at the story of a mom who's upset because she feels that her friend is "ditching" her because she's already a mom. However, it seems that Redditors have a different take on the situation.
It All Began When She Accidentally Got Pregnant.
No-Youth-6786The OP Wants Her Best Friend to Hang Out at Her Place.
No-Youth-6786The Best Friend Invited Her for a Drink with Other People.
But the OP declined and asked her best friend to come over to drink with her instead.
Since the best friend's plan was set in stone, she decided to hang out with her other friends. That's when the OP got upset.
No-Youth-6786
Navigating Changes in Friendships
The transition to motherhood is a significant life change that can strain existing friendships. According to Dr. Madeline Levine, a child psychologist, "The shift in priorities often leads to feelings of isolation for new parents, as they navigate their new roles."
Insights from Dr. John Gottman, a renowned marriage researcher, suggest that "Friendships can falter when one party undergoes major life changes without the other being able to relate," highlighting the importance of understanding and support during such transitions.
The OP Saw Pictures of Her Friend Drinking Merrily. She Got Angrier.
No-Youth-6786
Because of What Happened, the OP and Her Friend Got into a Fight.
No-Youth-6786
The Friend Suggested That She Can Always Ask Her Husband to Watch Over the Child While She's Away. But the OP Took This the Wrong Way.
No-Youth-6786
Feelings of resentment or anger in such situations often arise from unmet expectations and lack of communication. The American Psychological Association suggests that openly discussing feelings and expectations can alleviate misunderstandings.
Encouraging dialogue about needs and boundaries can help pave the way for a more supportive friendship dynamic.
Redditors Were on the Best Friend's Side, Saying What She Did Wasn't Considered Ditching.
Haytham_Ken
Don't Bring Your Child to Hang Out with Your Friend Unless They're Open to It.
donnadesogni
This Redditor Is Tired of Some Parents Who Center the Conversation Around Their Kids.
LiveOnFive
Empathy and Understanding
Empathy plays a crucial role in maintaining friendships through life transitions. A study from Yale University found that when friends strive to understand each other's perspectives, they foster resilience in their relationships.
Practices like active listening and validating each other's feelings can strengthen bonds and reduce feelings of isolation.
Parents Can't Bond with Their Friends When Their Little Kids Are Around.
Throwawaycarstore, BitAltruistic2105
A Child's Curiosity Leads Them to Trouble.
Final_Figure_7150
She's the One Who Declined the Invitation. So Her Best Friend Didn't Ditch Her.
litfan35, DynamicHunter
It's vital to recognize that both parties may be experiencing different stresses. For example, the new mother might feel overwhelmed by her new responsibilities, while the friend may feel neglected. Understanding these dynamics can help both parties navigate their emotions more effectively.
Research indicates that acknowledging and discussing these feelings can lead to improved emotional health for both individuals.
Welp, You Already Know Her Reaction to This Kind of Suggestion.
Horror-Craft-4394, DaylightMaybe
It Seems That This Woman Has a Bigger Problem Than Feeling Ditched by Her Friend.
soonernotlater1015, colorfulzeeb
Working from Home Doesn't Mean You Can Always Take Breaks to Visit Your Friends.
FleurDeCLE, GloomyStorage
Practical Solutions for Reconnection
One effective strategy is to schedule regular catch-ups that accommodate the new mother's schedule. Short, consistent interactions can help maintain the friendship without overwhelming either party.
According to studies in social psychology, maintaining social connections—even in smaller doses—can significantly enhance emotional well-being for both friends.
When You Look at the Situation, It's the Best Friend Who's Being Accommodating.
FunkyOrangePenguin
Redditors Agreeing with the Statement Above
WV273, aggravated-asphalt
The Plan Was Already Set. The OP Has No Right to Demand the Best Friend Cancel Her Schedule.
ashes_9914
Additionally, finding common ground can help bridge the gap. Engaging in activities that both friends enjoy—even if they need to be modified for the new mother's circumstances—can rekindle the friendship.
Research shows that shared experiences can enhance feelings of closeness and mutual support.
It's Always About the OP's Terms, Not the Best Friend's Terms.
Predd1or
The OP Is Being Toxic, That's for Sure.
Predd1or
People Don't Need to Adjust for Their Friends Who Decided to Have Kids.
Dat_Mawe3000
The OP is so unfair to her friend. If you look at the situation, it's the best friend who's being considerate between the two.
After all, she is hanging out at the OP's house. Things wouldn't be an issue if she just accepted the invitation and had someone else watch her daughter.
Psychological Analysis
This situation highlights the common challenges that arise when friends undergo major life changes. It's essential for both parties to communicate their needs and feelings openly to prevent misunderstandings and resentment.
By working together to adapt their friendship to new circumstances, they can foster a more supportive and understanding relationship.
Analysis generated by AI
Analysis & Alternative Approaches
Maintaining friendships during significant life changes requires empathy, communication, and understanding. By discussing feelings and adjusting expectations, both friends can navigate this transition effectively.
Ultimately, fostering open dialogue and shared experiences can help revive and strengthen their bond.
