People Share The Funniest Things That A Complete Stranger Has Ever Said In Front Of Them
It really makes you wonder what out-of-context things other people hear.
As we go out and about, we unknowingly become minor characters in other people's lives. From the businessperson who pushed past you while on the phone to the friends you eavesdropped on at a café, we collect dozens of random snippets of people's lives.
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We all impact other people's lives. Some of these impacts are funnier than others. Sometimes a stranger says something that makes you laugh so hard that you will never forget them.
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The best thing I overheard was a woman talking on the phone on the train, and all I heard from her conversation was, “Yeah, well, you’re in prison, and I’m not.”
1. "Reddit, what's the funniest thing that a random stranger said to you that made you die laughing inside?"
The question was asked by u/Eta5678.
2. Who let the dogs out?
I was in the drive-thru of a Wendy’s one time. An employee exited the building with his headphones on and was singing “Who Let The Dogs Out” at the top of his lungs. He saw me, stopped singing, and started walking away. A few seconds later, he came up to my window and said, “Yes, that is what I’m listening to.” Then he walked away. I laughed so hard at the whole situation.3. TFW you get on the wrong train
“Okay, the laughter was not entirely inside, but years ago on the subway in NY, a crazy dude walked onto the train and screamed at everyone, “You’re all going to hell!” and then stepped off as the doors closed. Total silence as the weirdness of the moment settled in. Then, without missing a beat, the guy across from me said, “Shit, I thought this train was going to Harlem.” The entire subway car of cynical New Yorkers burst out laughing.”4. This is very vivid
“I was helping a customer pick out a new bra, and she said she wanted her breasts to be lifted. She said, “My boobs are so saggy that if my nipples were eyeballs, I’d be able to see if my shoes were untied.”I really tried my best to remain professional, but I couldn’t stop laughing, lol.”5. Ah, puns
“I must've been about 10 or 11. I sat down on a bench next to an old guy to sort my shoe out. I took my shoe off, and he just turned to me and said, “Are they golfing socks?” I looked at him with a completely blank look on my face, thinking, “WTF??” As I looked away, he just said, “There’s a hole in one.””6. A dangerous, yet impressive skill
“A few months ago, I was waiting at a road crossing with loads of other strangers, waiting for the man to turn green. This was a busy main road in my city.A little girl on the other side of the road did THE MOST ACCURATE IMPRESSION of the 'beep beep' that the crossing makes so blind people know it's safe to cross, and the entire crowd of people just stepped into the road. I had seen her do it, so I stayed put, but I couldn't stop laughing. My girlfriend was confused.50 adults pranked by one absolute genius 6-year-old. It was magic.”7. Imagine having such god s*x that you end up losing a limb
“The time I was waiting for takeout, the amputee owner struck up a conversation.“My friend, you have to be really careful if you ever get shot in the knee or any leg bone. They don't warn you that you can't have sex for months. One night you're taking home a beautiful girl to show her your scars, and the next morning your leg's gone.”8. Wally-mellyons
“In May of 2000, while passing through Norwood, Louisiana, with a friend, at around 2 in the afternoon, we stopped to gas up and grab some snacks at the most podunk gas station known to man.A young man, extremely agitated, came in with frustrated gestures and angrily shouted and gestured at the cashier with an accent that was beyond region, beyond stereotyping, beyond anything I had heard before:“Where da' got damned wally-mellyons at!!” at the top of his lungs, approaching hysteria and tears.”9. Meanwhile that guy is cringing inside
“I work in retail, and I’m not sure why, but this had me dying for a while. I still laugh when I think about it.Me: “How are you doing today, sir?”Customer: “Yep.”And he went on his way.”10. Classic
“I met a guy while camping a few years ago. He told us, matter-of-factly, that he was a “Redneck hippie” back in the 60s. He was “there for the sex and the drugs, but not so much that love and peace shit.” We still crack up about that.”11. Poor guy
“The college I attend frequently has local elementary and middle school kids on tours, especially on Fridays.One particular Friday, I was in line for the cafeteria when a group of kids came walking by with a tour guide. One kind of chubby little dude looked a bit uncomfortable. He was biting his lip a little and sweating. This part of the tour is usually when they have a bathroom break, and clearly, buddy needed to go. At this point, I should note that the bathrooms are visible from where we're standing.But the tour guide, a fellow student of mine, didn't seem to notice. She just kept going on and on, talking about the history of the building. I watched this kid go from nervous to deeply anxious to visibly clenching over a span of about 3 minutes. He was staring at the stick figure dude on the men's bathroom sign as if it were the risen Christ.Ms. Tour Guide took a break in her spiel. I figured she was done; the next words out of her mouth would be ones to free this boy from the purgatory that is having to use the bathroom on a school trip. It would be over. He'd be free.What followed, instead, was this.“So in 1995, a professor named A.B.C. Kalamazoo—”“Move, lady, I'm gonna shit my ass!”He ran past her to the bathroom and presumably destroyed it. Poor guy. He had the entire line in tears with laughter, though.”12. Love's greatest test: watersports
“I once was canoeing with my fiancé for the first time, and we were having a bit of trouble at first getting a rhythm going, so we were along the edge of the water hitting the canal. This random couple was walking along the wall and said to his wife while pointing at us,“Ahh, canoeing, the true test of love.”My fiancé and I burst into laughter for 20 minutes and then finally got our rhythm together.”13. When old people realize they're old
[deleted]:
“I was at a 50th wedding anniversary party, and there were LOTS of elderly people in attendance. An old man was standing next to me and said, “It looks like a fucking graveyard in here.” I literally spit my beer out (we were outdoors). The kicker was the guy was close to the same age as everyone else.”
