Bride And Groom Worry When The Best Man And Bridesmaid Plan A Holiday Right Before The Wedding
"They think me and fiancee are over reacting because nothing can go wrong"
Weddings are often described as one of the happiest days of a couple’s life, but the weeks leading up to the big day can be some of the most stressful. Beyond choosing venues, outfits, and menus, couples rely heavily on their closest friends and family to help things run smoothly.
That’s why roles like best man and bridesmaid carry weight—these aren’t just symbolic titles, they come with real responsibilities.
Whether it’s attending fittings, helping with last-minute errands, or simply providing emotional support, the bridal party is expected to be present and dependable in the run-up to the ceremony. But what happens when personal plans collide with those obligations?
That’s the dilemma one couple faced when two key members of their wedding party made a decision that left the bride and groom feeling blindsided. The groom explained that their wedding had been booked since the previous year, and on Christmas Day they asked a close married couple to stand as best man and bridesmaid.
Both were thrilled, even describing it as the best gift they had received that day. On top of that, the bridesmaid offered to do the bride’s bright red hair and style the other bridesmaids, a gesture that meant a lot given the expense and importance of wedding preparations.
However, just weeks before the big day, the couple received a surprising phone call. The bridesmaid and best man had booked a two-week holiday that ended the day before the wedding.
The OP asks:
RedditThe wedding had been booked since late the previous year. On Christmas Day, the couple asked a married pair of friends to be best man and bridesmaid.
Both accepted enthusiastically, calling it the best gift of the day. The bridesmaid also agreed to do the bride’s bright red hair and style the other bridesmaids.
Weeks before the wedding, the best man and bridesmaid revealed they had booked a two-week holiday. Their return flight would land at 9 a.m. the day before the ceremony, with a 2–3 hour drive still ahead.
They reassured the couple that “nothing would go wrong” and even suggested doing the bride’s hair the night before if needed.
The couple felt abandoned during the crucial preparation period.
They didn’t object to the holiday itself, just the timing so close to the wedding.
From the couple’s perspective, it wasn’t about forbidding their friends from going on holiday—it was about feeling abandoned at the most important stage of planning.
They couldn’t understand how their best man and bridesmaid thought returning just hours before the wedding was “good enough.” Meanwhile, the friends dismissed the concern as overreacting, confident everything would fall into place.
This sounds quite demanding
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However, there is a lot to organize
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They are not the ones getting married
RedditThis is true
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Things might happen:
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Expert Opinion
This scenario highlights a common tension in relationships where expectations clash. The couple likely feels a sense of vulnerability and reliance on their friends, making the best man and bridesmaid's decision to travel so close to the wedding feel like a betrayal. On the flip side, the friends might be viewing their holiday as a well-deserved break, unaware of the emotional weight their absence adds to the couple's already high-stress situation. It’s a classic case of differing perspectives on commitment and support, which can lead to misunderstandings if not openly discussed.
This situation raises a larger question about the balance between personal freedom and wedding responsibilities. When someone agrees to play a central role in a wedding, are they committing to more than just showing up on the day?
For many couples, the answer is yes. The final weeks are a time when support, reliability, and presence matter most. For friends, however, it can be easy to underestimate how much stress last-minute changes or risks can add.
Ultimately, this story is less about a holiday and more about differing expectations—what the couple saw as a breach of trust, their friends saw as harmless timing.
