Mom Enforces "Four Gift Rule" For Christmas As Dad Pushes To Spoil Kids With Endless Presents
A gift rule meant to simplify Christmas ends up dividing a family.
Christmas memories tend to stick in your head long after the wrapping paper is gone. For one dad, waking up to a stuffed stocking and a pile of brightly wrapped surprises was the highlight of childhood.
Those mornings shaped what he believes Christmas should feel like for his own kids today. However, his wife sees things a little differently.
She recently came across the “four gifts rule,” a growing trend where parents keep holiday spending simple by sticking to one gift they want, one they need, one to wear, and one to read. It sounded thoughtful to her and a good way to avoid going overboard.
He didn’t love the idea. Their kids are eight and nine, and he feels four gifts might shrink the excitement they look forward to all year.
He isn’t trying to bury them under toys, but he thinks a handful of presents under the tree, plus stocking stuffers, helps keep the magic alive.
When he said he preferred about nine presents each and a full stocking like the one he had growing up, the conversation took a turn.
She accused him of spoiling the kids. But he felt she was stripping away the joy and turning Christmas into something too small and strict.
The tension wasn’t really about the number of gifts. It came down to childhood memories, expectations, and what each parent sees as the right balance.
Check out the screenshots below to digest the full story.
Let’s dig into the details
Reddit.comA bit of backstory
Reddit.comOP’s wife wanted them to do the “four gifts rule” for Christmas, but he argued that the kids would be less happy if they only got four gifts for Christmas
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OP’s wife was upset and accused him of spoiling the kids, especially since he suggested nine gifts each
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We gathered some interesting comments from the Reddit community
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“NAH. It sounds like you need to have a discussion about why she feels the children are spoiled.”
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“Maybe instead of a bunch of gifts get something for the whole family on top of 4 or 5 gifts.”
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“Maybe it would be easier to agree an amount of money for each child that you both feel comfortable with…”
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“Why not discuss with your wife using the next couple of years to somewhat wean down to 4 gifts by the time the are teens or older teens.”
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“Where I'm from, it's perfectly normal to just get one or two gifts from the parents (no gifts from Santa).”
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“Constantly worrying about spoiling kids can make you go too far in the other direction.”
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“NAH - both of you have valid points…”
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“NAH it's personal preference but 9 gifts and 9 stocking stuffers - in my opinion- is a lot. It creates materialistic kids.”
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This situation sits in that gray space where both parents’ feelings make sense. One wants to keep Christmas lively and full of the magic he remembers, while the other wants structure and a calmer approach that teaches the kids healthy expectations.
They’re not arguing about gifts as much as what they believe childhood should feel like. A little honest middle ground might help them shape a holiday that reflects both values.
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