Is It Wrong to Tell a Friend Theyre Ruining Their Relationship?

AITAH for being brutally honest with my friend about her open marriage, leading to a fallout?

Damjan

Published in Interesting
11 Mar 2026

Is It Wrong to Tell a Friend Theyre Ruining Their Relationship?

Some friendships don’t survive the moment you say the quiet part out loud. In this Reddit post, OP watches a newly married friend turn an “open marriage” conversation into a full-on revolving door at home, and the fallout lands right on OP’s doorstep.

[ADVERTISEMENT]

Here’s the messy setup: the friend (22F) married her husband a year ago, then, about three months after the wedding, pitched swinging and made it sound like a group thing. It didn’t stay theoretical. Men started showing up when the husband was at work, and after one new guy came in two months ago, the husband’s jealousy turned into constant fights. OP’s friend even asked for advice, then got mad when OP was blunt about how this isn’t “fine” if the husband is clearly not on board.

[ADVERTISEMENT]

Now OP is wondering if the honesty was too harsh, or if her friend was always going to burn the bridge the second someone called out the damage.

Original Post

My friend (22 f) has been married for almost a year now. About 3 months after the wedding she opened the idea of an open marriage.

She used the term swinging, saying it would be a group thing not a just her thing. Well it didn’t take long for her to start bringing men into the house when he was at work and he knew about it.

She brought this new guy in two months ago and it’s very obvious that her husband is jealous of it. Since he’s been brought in they fight constantly.

She came to me asking for advice and I’m a very brutally honest person. I let her know that most swingers swap couples and don’t just bring in one man for themselves.

I told her that if she wanted to openly cheat on her spouse in their house while he was at work then she was going to have to deal with how her marriage would suffer from it. I told her she’s not looking at how he’s feeling and it’s sad that me and my partner can obviously see he’s not happy.

When I said that she told me I was judging her for what she was doing, and her marriage was going to be fine as long and we find someone for her husband. I told her that make the reason he hasn’t brought anyone home is because he’s uncomfortable with it and she needed to sit down and talk to him.

She said it was unnecessary and for me to keep my nose in my business. I then said okay but don’t come to me with this topic again when I told you my opinion which you asked for.