Guy Asks If He Is An Idiot For Boarding A Plane Without His Girlfriend Because She Just Told Him Her Passport Expired
They were at the boarding gate when she realized her passport had expired, even though he had reminded her several times to renew it. # r/AmItheA**hole
An interesting question appeared on the subreddit r/AmItheA**hole recently. A person with a throwaway account u/tawayaitalifeskills posted an unusual question. It seems he has significant problems with his girlfriend because he left her at the airport and went on vacation by himself.
That is pretty awful; what could possibly explain that? Well, she apparently forgot to renew her passport, and it expired, even though he had reminded her several times to check it.
The guy goes on to explain that they have been together for two years, and even though she is very skilled in her field of work, she is totally untrained in other aspects of life. Living with her parents spared her from many everyday responsibilities that a normal adult has.
He says that he has been comparing his girlfriend to his mom. His dad left them when he was 11. Although his mom didn’t know English or ever paid a bill in her life, she managed to figure it out.
“She’s a f*cking legend, but this experience imprinted on me the need that any partner I have in the future has to be self-sufficient and capable of looking after themselves,” the OP wrote. “His girlfriend can’t hold a candle to mom.”
OP says that his girlfriend “doesn’t even know how to do basic sh*t like post a f*cking letter,” and after she got her first car, she didn’t want to learn how to care for it, which led to a severe breakdown because there was no oil in it. But the actual problem was this:
“We booked a holiday for two weeks to tour Southeast Asia. I asked her if her passport had at least a year left on it. She said yes. At the airport, she found out it was expired after I had a look at it. I asked why she hadn’t checked to renew it: her dad was the one who had sent the application in ten years ago, and she didn’t know it had to be sent in to be renewed (wtf?).”
The OP was furious, so he boarded the plane without his careless girlfriend:
“I returned from the holiday (she didn’t answer any of my calls or texts while I was abroad), and once I was back, she chewed me out for abandoning her at the airport (it’s a 20-minute train ride from our city center, and the terminus is at the airport). She said I should have double-checked her documentation since I know about this sort of stuff. I told her, sorry, but I’m not going to waste 3000 pounds because you didn’t bother to check the exact thing I asked you to. It’s really frustrating because I don’t want to treat a partner like a child, like my dad did with my mom.
AITA here?”
This basically seems like a “validation post,” or one where you are convinced you did the right thing, but you want approval from people on the internet.
The OP and this girl have been together for two years, and he is aware of what she’s like. Most people seem to agree he was nonetheless right, and she’s wrong for being angry:
There is a significant percentage of people that say “ESH” (Everyone Sucks Here) and ask OP why he is staying with his girlfriend.
But the most significant comment comes from Dr. William Doherty, family therapist, who states, “Relationships thrive on mutual support and compatibility. If one partner consistently feels burdened, it may be time to reassess the relationship.”
If the OP wants to be an adult, he should consider breaking up with this girl so she can find someone willing to take care of her, and he can find someone more independent.
What do you think? Who is right here? Share your thoughts in the comments section.
