Pained Man Wants To End One-Month Marriage After Finding Out His Wife Lied About Her Past And Her Video On Por*hub

It is a personal choice whether to be married or live with a partner. However, for the majority of married and cohabiting individuals, love and companionship come first over other factors like the desire to have children in the future, convenience, or finances.

Making a formal commitment is another important consideration for most people who are married, particularly if they didn't live with their spouse before getting married. The OP and his partner have been together for seven years, so they decided to take things up a notch.

They couldn't have a proper wedding because of the pandemic. Additionally, they only had two witnesses: the OP's mom and his partner's mom.

Now, OP's partner has always told him that she was never a one-night stand or a 'hook-up on the first night' kind of person. The OP posted a photo of them together in their garden, and a guy he hasn't spoken to since school messaged him, sending a video and asking if this is his wife.

The OP took a look and saw that it was a Pornhub video of his wife performing oral sex on a man in a club toilet stall. The OP definitely knew it was her because she has a shoulder tattoo, which is quite identifiable.

To say the OP was devastated is an understatement, as he couldn't cope with what he had just discovered. Keep scrolling and read the entire story below.

OP writes

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OP says that it definitely is her because she has a shoulder tattoo, which is pretty identifying

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The Reddit post got more than 400 comments, and here are a bunch of them

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The Psychological Impact of Lies in Relationships

Trust is a cornerstone of healthy relationships, and breaches of trust can have devastating effects. According to Dr. Esther Perel, a renowned couples therapist, "When partners discover lies, it can lead to feelings of betrayal and insecurity that are difficult to overcome." Research supports this notion, indicating that dishonesty can severely disrupt relationship dynamics. In this case, the husband's deception about his past has undoubtedly triggered deep-seated emotions, complicating the couple's ability to move forward, as noted by Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a relationship expert who states, "Understanding the roots of our emotional responses is crucial for healing and rebuilding trust."

The OP could find out if only he asks her

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The OP should talk to her before jumping to conclusions

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She likely feels violated, used, and her relationship has been pierced

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Moreover, the emotional fallout from betrayal can manifest in various ways, including anxiety and depression. A study in the Journal of Marriage and Family indicates that individuals who experience betrayal in romantic relationships often struggle with self-esteem and may find it challenging to trust again.

The OP is willing to throw away a seven-year relationship

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It's going to be worse for her if she finds out she's online

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The OP is pretty sure the wife knew she was being recorded, and he says:

Oh, trust me, she had knowledge of being recorded. Conclusions are all I've got; it's not like she's been forthcoming thus far, so why would she be forthcoming going forward? I don't buy that stuff, if I'm being honest.

The OP should get a divorce and move on with his life

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Addressing Relationship Betrayal

Addressing betrayal requires open communication and a willingness to confront difficult emotions. Experts suggest that couples therapy can be instrumental in navigating these challenges, as it provides a safe space to explore feelings of hurt and confusion.

Studies indicate that couples who engage in therapy after betrayal often find pathways to rebuild trust and intimacy, which are critical for healing.

She might have lied, but what if she doesn't remember it?

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This redditor can bet she only enjoys all the things the OP does for her

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The OP knows nothing and should act accordingly until he finds out

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To facilitate healing, partners should consider establishing ground rules for discussing sensitive topics. Research shows that creating a structured approach to conversations can help prevent escalation and promote understanding. Regular check-ins can also help partners express their feelings and rebuild their connection.

It was not a guy she'd been with for a while, and if it was, she lied to me about her past boyfriends. It was clear in the video that she knew she was being recorded. More like she stopped liking it when she started dating me because I'm not a 10/10 sexy alpha male, the OP writes.

Clearly, he's very pained about it, and we hope he heals pretty soon.

Psychological Analysis

This scenario illustrates the profound impact of dishonesty on relationships. The husband's past actions have understandably caused emotional turmoil, complicating the couple's ability to rebuild trust. Addressing these feelings through open dialogue and therapy is crucial for healing.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, navigating betrayal in relationships is a complex process that requires patience and communication. By addressing emotions openly and considering couples therapy, partners can work toward rebuilding trust and intimacy. Establishing ground rules for discussions can further facilitate healing and understanding.