Redditor Says She Regrets Letting Her Mom Talk Her Out Of Having An Abortion
"Find a nice family for your baby."
A 28-year-old woman didn’t just ask Reddit for advice, she asked for help untangling a decision that already cost her. She planned to get an abortion after finding out she was pregnant months ago, but her mom’s pressure turned it into a ticking clock. OP delayed, now it’s too late, and she’s stuck with regret, still hasn’t talked to her mom, and is worried about what happens next if she considers adoption.
And the worst part, the OP says, is she’s still financially dependent on that same mom, while dealing with PTSD and bipolar disorder.
The OP asked for advice on telling her mom that she resents her for pressuring her into not having an abortion.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregnThe OP explained that she found out she was pregnant a few months ago and was planning on getting an abortion.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregnBut the OP's mother made it clear that she did not approve of terminating the pregnancy.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
The emotional consequences surrounding the choice of having an abortion are intricate and deeply felt.
The OP delayed the abortion, and now that it's too late, she's regretting not having it.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
In an update, the OP said she still hadn't spoken to her mother about it.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
She explained that she's apprehensive about potentially putting the baby up for adoption.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
She thought the pregnancy would be handled on her timeline, then her mom’s disapproval made every week feel heavier.
Studies have shown that the decision to have an abortion can be influenced by various factors, including personal circumstances and support systems. Individuals with strong support networks are more likely to cope positively with their decisions.
Conversely, those who feel isolated may struggle more with their feelings of loss and regret.
The Redditor says her mother is not religious and has supported other people in getting abortions.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
She also explained that she is still financially dependent on her mom.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
The OP was diagnosed with PTSD and Bipolar Disorder.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
That’s when OP’s silence kicked in, because she still hasn’t confronted her mother about the abortion she didn’t get.
Processing feelings of regret after an abortion is a critical aspect of emotional healing.
It’s a lot like the friend who wanted to adopt a pet despite past impulsive decisions, where boundaries matter.
She explained that she got pregnant because she forgot to take her birth control pill.
Reddit/throwraunwantedpregn
Here's how people reacted.
Reddit/bananafor
Pregnancy hormones can be tough on your mental health.
Reddit/soft-cuddly-potato
Even the “just give the child up for adoption” comments hit differently when OP is already financially stuck with the person who pushed her to wait.
To move forward, it may be helpful for the individual to explore their feelings in a therapeutic setting. A therapist can provide guidance in processing emotions related to their decision while helping to develop a positive self-narrative.
Support groups can also offer a sense of community and understanding, allowing individuals to share their experiences and find validation.
"Give the child up for adoption."
Reddit/hisimpendingbaldness
"Cut off your mom."
Reddit/LittleRedWolf413
"Just say you miscarried."
Reddit/CuriousPenguinSocks
Research the laws.
Reddit/dekage55
"She was selfish in pressuring you."
Reddit/Laundylady
"Find a nice family for your baby."
Reddit/Constant_Cultural
What about the father?
Reddit/UnHealthyFun69
"If you're not ready, then you're not ready."
Reddit/faewiee
"You can't be a mother now."
Reddit/sah48s
"Do not give that baby to your mother."
Reddit/Potapus1997
By the time her birth control slip and late timing came into focus, the family dinner-level fallout was already brewing inside her head.
What's your take on this situation? Do you think the OP should have gone through with the abortion under the circumstances, or is it a good thing that her mother stopped her?
We would love to hear your opinions on this situation. You can share your thoughts with us in the comment section.
The emotional landscape surrounding the decision to continue or terminate a pregnancy is fraught with complexity, as highlighted by the Redditor's account. Her regret over allowing her mother to influence her choice underscores the importance of personal agency in such pivotal moments. Creating supportive environments where individuals feel empowered to make informed decisions is crucial, particularly when faced with unexpected circumstances. The journey through these feelings is not just about the immediate decision but also about fostering resilience and personal growth in the aftermath.
Now OP is stuck regretting the choice she made under her mom’s pressure, and she doesn’t know how to face what comes next.
For another tense family moment, read whether she should skip her best friend’s baby shower after pregnancy fallout.