Husband Upset That Pregnant Wife Declines to Attend His Cousin's Gender Reveal Party, So He Lies to Her Boss That She Had a Miscarriage to Get Her Day Off

"The fact that he can lie about the death of his child and not see how incredibly messed up that is, is what's concerning."

A husband fabricated a distasteful lie about his wife's pregnancy to coerce her into attending his cousin's gender reveal party. The 29-year-old OP has a full-time job, while her husband has a more relaxed schedule due to his part-time work.

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Her husband spends most of his free time with his family during his daily visits. He complains that OP has missed most of his family's events.

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OP foregoes attending her in-laws' weekly parties when she believes they are unimportant. Her husband informed her that his mom noted her frequent absences from their events.

He said it affected his mom's opinion of her. She thinks OP values her work over her family.

OP has had this conversation with her husband and his mom previously. She tried to make them see things from her perspective, but it didn't work.

He asked her to attend his cousin's gender reveal party. OP declined because she was scheduled to work and couldn't get a day off due to their pressing deadlines.

Her husband became angry because it proved that OP prioritized her work over his family. He grew even more upset when OP stated that a relative's gender reveal party wasn't important enough to require her presence.

The following day, her husband sent a message to OP's boss using her phone. He pretended to be her to inform her boss that she couldn't make it to work.

He told OP's boss that she was at the hospital because she was having a miscarriage. OP didn't want to believe what her husband did.

He told OP's boss that she was at the hospital because she was having a miscarriage. OP didn't want to believe what her husband did.u/Throwaway97499456
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She yelled at him to go to their bedroom and confronted him. Her boss didn't even know she was pregnant.

She yelled at him to go to their bedroom and confronted him. Her boss didn't even know she was pregnant.u/Throwaway97499456
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Her husband claimed that OP's attitude toward his family's events forced him to lie. It was his attempt to get OP out of work to "actually focus on what matters."

Her husband claimed that OP's attitude toward his family's events forced him to lie. It was his attempt to get OP out of work to u/Throwaway97499456

Understanding the Implications of Miscommunication

Dr. Kevin Johnson, a family therapist, points out that miscommunication in relationships can lead to severe consequences, especially when it involves sensitive topics like pregnancy.

His research highlights how misunderstandings can escalate conflicts, particularly when one partner feels their emotional needs are invalidated.

Studies published in the Journal of Clinical Psychology show that effective communication is key to resolving conflicts and maintaining healthy relationships.

OP was furious. She told her husband that he jeopardized her livelihood. He tried to place the blame on OP and said he wouldn't have needed to lie if he had shown the same respect to his family that they showed to her.

OP said she wouldn't go to his cousin's party after what happened. She asked him how she was supposed to maintain the ridiculous lie he told her boss.

Her husband suggested she could say it was just a "miscarriage scare." He then left to attend his cousin's party and hasn't spoken to OP since.

OP was furious. She told her husband that he jeopardized her livelihood. He tried to place the blame on OP and said he wouldn't have needed to lie if he had shown the same respect to his family that they showed to her.u/Throwaway97499456

Some people do not deserve the privilege of becoming a parent. OP's husband is one of them.

Some people do not deserve the privilege of becoming a parent. OP's husband is one of them.OrangeCubit

What does he even contribute to their marriage?

What does he even contribute to their marriage?nolan358

This situation reflects a troubling misuse of trust within the marital relationship, where one partner resorts to deceit to manipulate the other.

Psychologists note that such behaviors often stem from fear of conflict or abandonment, which can lead to harmful patterns over time.

Research indicates that dishonesty in relationships can erode trust and create long-lasting emotional scars.

Whether she stays or leaves, OP will raise her baby alone.

Whether she stays or leaves, OP will raise her baby alone.TeeKaye28, fishminer3

A person this childish and selfish is not going to be a fit parent.

A person this childish and selfish is not going to be a fit parent.Reddit

Didn't he get chills down his spine when he lied about his own baby dying? For what? To manipulate his wife into attending a gender reveal party?

Didn't he get chills down his spine when he lied about his own baby dying? For what? To manipulate his wife into attending a gender reveal party?ClothDiaperAddicts

The Psychological Impact of Lies in Relationships

Behavioral psychologists emphasize that lying can have profound psychological impacts on both the liar and the deceived.

According to research from the University of Michigan, dishonesty can lead to increased anxiety and stress, as the individual must constantly manage their deceit.

In relationships, this dynamic can create a cycle of mistrust and resentment, undermining emotional intimacy.

He messed up her life and career; now he gets to sit back and pout while she deals with the consequences.

He messed up her life and career; now he gets to sit back and pout while she deals with the consequences.haleorshine

OP should definitely tell her mother-in-law what her son did and lied about. She may not be on her side, but at least she will know how her son treats his wife.

OP should definitely tell her mother-in-law what her son did and lied about. She may not be on her side, but at least she will know how her son treats his wife.Acceptable_Day6086

This isn't a great environment for a child to grow up in. OP's husband will not be a good role model for their kid.

This isn't a great environment for a child to grow up in. OP's husband will not be a good role model for their kid.EvilFinch

To address these issues, couples therapy may provide a constructive space for both partners to express their feelings and rebuild trust.

Research shows that couples who engage in therapy can develop healthier communication patterns and work through underlying emotional issues.

Effective therapeutic approaches often include exploring the motivations behind dishonest behaviors and fostering empathy for each other's experiences.

What will her husband do when OP declines to attend his family's Thanksgiving or Christmas?

What will her husband do when OP declines to attend his family's Thanksgiving or Christmas?worldtraveler197

It's disturbing that after the stunt he pulled, he still thinks OP is at fault.

It's disturbing that after the stunt he pulled, he still thinks OP is at fault.notdorisday

He was so convinced he did a good thing that he punished OP by giving her the cold shoulder. He wasn't even sorry that he lied about her having a miscarriage.

Redditors were horrified by the actions of OP's husband. OP didn't post any updates or respond to any comments asking how she was doing, so we can only speculate how this issue was resolved.

Rebuilding Trust and Healing

Rebuilding trust after such a breach requires both partners to actively engage in the process of emotional healing.

Studies indicate that establishing open lines of communication, coupled with a commitment to honesty, can facilitate this healing process.

According to findings in the Journal of Family Psychology, trust can be rebuilt when both partners acknowledge their roles in the relationship dynamic.

Psychological Analysis

This scenario highlights a severe breach of trust within the relationship, illustrating how fear and anxiety can lead to destructive behaviors. The husband's choice to lie about such a sensitive issue reflects deeper emotional struggles that need to be addressed through open dialogue and understanding.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

The road to recovery in this relationship is challenging yet possible with dedication and effort from both partners.

As observed in psychological research, effective communication and emotional honesty are key components to restoring trust and intimacy.

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