Roommate Breaks Coffee Maker: AITA for Refusing to Share?
AITAH for not sharing my coffee maker with my roommate who broke it? Roommate's friend broke the coffee maker, but roommate refuses to contribute to fixing it.
A 29-year-old man says his roommate broke their expensive coffee maker and then acted like it was no big deal. He didn’t just lose a machine, he lost his daily routine, his favorite way to make coffee, and the one shared item he paid more for.
Here’s the mess: he was out, Lily had friends over for a cooking session, and when he came back the high-end coffee maker was broken. Lily admitted one of her friends dropped it, called it an honest accident, and still didn’t offer to split the repair or replace it. The OP thinks “it happened while your guests were using it” means Lily should cover part of the damage, but Lily says accidents happen and it’s “for both of us,” so why should she pay?
Now he’s wondering if refusing to absorb the cost makes him the a*****e, or if Lily is trying to treat her friend’s mistake like a shared expense.
Original Post
So I'm (29M) and I share an apartment with my roommate (27F), let's call her Lily. We split the costs of shared items like kitchen appliances, and one item we jointly own is a high-end coffee maker that I contributed more towards buying.
Lily enjoys using it too, though not as much as me. Recently, Lily had a few friends over while I was out, and they had a cooking session.
When I got back, I found our coffee maker broken. Lily admitted that one of her friends accidentally dropped it but said it was an honest mistake.
She didn't offer to split the repair cost or replace it. I was upset because it's an expensive item that I valued a lot, and Lily knows how much I love my coffee.
I told her that since it was broken under her watch, it's only fair that she contributes to fixing or replacing it. Lily got defensive, saying accidents happen, and it wasn't her fault personally.
She argued that it was for both of us and didn't see why she should pay. I understand accidents can occur, but I feel she should take some responsibility as it happened during an event she hosted.
Am I the a*****e here?
Why Accountability Matters
This situation highlights the murky waters of accountability in shared living spaces. Lily’s friend broke the coffee maker, but the expectation that the OP should absorb the cost of replacement is puzzling. It’s one thing to lend a helping hand; it’s another to shoulder the burden of someone else’s mistake. This dynamic raises questions about responsibility and fairness in roommate relationships.
Moreover, the OP’s refusal to share might seem harsh on the surface, but it also reflects a deeper concern about boundaries. If Lily won’t contribute to fixing the coffee maker, does that signal a lack of investment in their living arrangement? The tension between their roles as roommates and friends complicates the matter, making it relatable for many in similar situations.
Comment from u/tiger_song789
Comment from u/sunnySideDown
Comment from u/oceanbird23
That coffee maker was already a point of contention because OP paid more for it, and then Lily’s cooking-session friends dropped it anyway.
When OP found the machine broken after coming home, Lily’s “honest mistake” explanation was all she offered, no repair plan, no replacement offer.
Community Reactions and Divisions
The Reddit community's mixed reactions reveal just how nuanced this situation is. Some commenters side with the OP, arguing that it’s unjust for him to bear the financial burden for something outside his control. Others criticize the OP for being unforgiving and not embodying the spirit of shared living. This division showcases how personal experiences shape our views on shared responsibilities.
Additionally, the high-end nature of the coffee maker adds another layer to the debate. It’s a luxury item, so expectations around its care and maintenance might differ compared to a standard machine. This story resonates because it taps into the universal struggle of navigating shared spaces and the underlying tensions of friendship and financial obligations.
Comment from u/moonlightHowl
Comment from u/blueraspberry88
OP pushed back hard, saying the damage happened under Lily’s watch, but Lily got defensive and blamed the accident, not herself.
The real fight is whether Lily should treat her friend’s dropped coffee maker like a personal responsibility or like a cost OP should just eat.
We're curious to hear your perspective. Share your thoughts in the comments.
The Takeaway
It’s easy for emotions to run high when money and possessions are involved, especially in a tight living situation. How do you think the OP should have handled it differently? Should he have offered to share, or is he justified in standing his ground? Share your thoughts!
Why This Matters
This situation between the original poster and Lily underscores the tension that often arises in shared living arrangements.
Nobody wants to pay for someone else’s dropped coffee maker and call it “shared.”
Still debating money vs. sentiment? See what happened when a roommate broke his precious vase during a move, then refused to pay.
