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Lady Intends Telling Her Boyfriend To Stop Wearing Shirts That Do Not Cover His Belly, Seeks A Second Opinion Online

"I'm tired of watching him cook dinner or do laundry with his belly exposed."

Lady Intends Telling Her Boyfriend To Stop Wearing Shirts That Do Not Cover His Belly, Seeks A Second Opinion Online

People are more likely to accumulate additional weight, especially belly fat, if they habitually consume more calories than they burn each day. Additionally, aging has an impact.

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This is because, as people age, they lose muscle, and those who are not physically active automatically worsen the issue. One thing you must know is that the body uses calories less quickly when muscle mass is lost.

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The maintenance of a healthy weight may become more difficult as a result. Even if they don't gain weight, many people find that as they age, their belly fat increases.

An individual's likelihood of being overweight or obese can also be influenced by genetics, which affects where the body stores fat as well.

For the OP's boyfriend of five years, he carries most of his weight in his midsection and has gone up two sizes since they first started dating. In fact, he has gained about 90 pounds over the course of their relationship.

OP's boyfriend wears his newer 2XL shirts whenever they leave the apartment, but he still wears the L and XL shirts when they're at home. This is because he sees no reason to throw them away, despite the fact that they don't even cover his gut anymore.

Well, the OP is tired of watching him cook dinner or do laundry with his belly exposed on an almost daily basis.

So the OP chose to ask...

So the OP chose to ask...Reddit/Ok_Function_1558
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The OP wishes her boyfriend would just throw them away and buy more 2XLs to wear around the apartment

The OP wishes her boyfriend would just throw them away and buy more 2XLs to wear around the apartmentReddit/Ok_Function_1558
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a-hole:

  1. I want to tell my boyfriend to stop wearing shirts that leave his gut exposed.
  2. It could be considered controlling and/or rude.

And the comments from other Redditors roll in...

And the comments from other Redditors roll in...Reddit/Ok_Function_1558

Body Image and Relationship Dynamics

The concern expressed in this situation often reflects deeper issues related to body image and societal expectations.

According to research published in the International Journal of Eating Disorders, partners can sometimes project their insecurities onto one another, leading to conflicts over appearance.

When one partner feels uncomfortable with another's body image, it can indicate a need to address their own feelings of self-worth and acceptance.

It's just rude to bring it up

It's just rude to bring it upReddit/Ok_Function_1558

This Redditor sees women like that all the time

This Redditor sees women like that all the timeReddit/Ok_Function_1558

The OP wants to tell him she hates his body

The OP wants to tell him she hates his bodyReddit/Ok_Function_1558

This scenario presents an opportunity to explore how societal norms shape our perceptions of acceptable body image.

Dr. Kim C. S. Lee, a noted psychologist, suggests that cultural pressures can exacerbate insecurities, leading individuals to impose unrealistic standards on their partners.

Understanding these influences can be vital in fostering a more supportive and accepting relationship.

The OP should just leave him alone

The OP should just leave him aloneReddit/Ok_Function_1558

If the OP hates his stomach so much, she should leave the relationship

If the OP hates his stomach so much, she should leave the relationshipReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Why does that even matter?

Why does that even matter?Reddit/Ok_Function_1558

Effective Communication Strategies

Open communication is essential when addressing personal concerns about a partner's appearance.

Research indicates that using 'I' statements—such as 'I feel uncomfortable when...'

This approach fosters dialogue rather than defensiveness, allowing both partners to express their needs and arrive at a mutual understanding.

He will probably become very self-conscious if the OP brings it up

He will probably become very self-conscious if the OP brings it upReddit/Ok_Function_1558

You can handle adult conversations

You can handle adult conversationsReddit/Ok_Function_1558

It does not matter if you're fat or thin

It does not matter if you're fat or thinReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Additionally, couples can benefit from exploring body positivity initiatives together, which can strengthen their bond.

Engaging in activities that promote self-acceptance, such as attending workshops on body positivity or practicing mindfulness, can help mitigate negative feelings.

Ultimately, this shared journey can enhance intimacy and reduce conflict over appearance-related issues.

The OP is probably going to have this issue again

The OP is probably going to have this issue againReddit/Ok_Function_1558

It's crazier telling your boyfriend what he can't wear

It's crazier telling your boyfriend what he can't wearReddit/Ok_Function_1558

This does have to do with how he looks now

This does have to do with how he looks nowReddit/Ok_Function_1558

The Impact of Emotional Vulnerability

It's important to consider the role of emotional vulnerability in relationships.

According to Dr. Esther Perel, a renowned couples therapist, "Vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and trust." Relationships thrive on the ability to express insecurities and fears openly. When one partner feels comfortable showing vulnerability, it encourages the other to do the same, creating a more nurturing environment.

Weight is a touchy subject

Weight is a touchy subjectReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Would the OP enjoy being spoken to that way?

Would the OP enjoy being spoken to that way?Reddit/Ok_Function_1558

It's crazy how many women have a hard line around this

It's crazy how many women have a hard line around thisReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Would he be the AH if he told OP the same?

Would he be the AH if he told OP the same?Reddit/Ok_Function_1558

If he's not comfy, he'll change clothes

If he's not comfy, he'll change clothesReddit/Ok_Function_1558

That look wouldn't be appealing to this Redditor too

That look wouldn't be appealing to this Redditor tooReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Telling him what to wear in his own home

Telling him what to wear in his own homeReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Double standard

Double standardReddit/Ok_Function_1558

Many Redditors agreed that 90 pounds is an absurd and unhealthy amount of weight for anyone to gain, as these are not just a couple of pounds that OP's boyfriend has put on. Realistically, it's a sum that a lot of people would be wary of for their health and possibly find repulsive.

The OP was declared not the AH, and you can share this story with your loved ones to get their opinions as well.

Psychological Analysis

This situation reflects common relational dynamics where one partner's insecurities about body image can lead to conflict.

It's crucial for both partners to engage in open dialogue, fostering an atmosphere of acceptance and support.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, addressing concerns about appearance in relationships requires sensitivity and open communication.

Research highlights that fostering an environment of acceptance and understanding can lead to healthier dynamics, ultimately strengthening the partnership.

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