Should I Exclude Dad from Thanksgiving for Insisting on Vegan Turkey?

A 28-year-old woman is about to find out how fast Thanksgiving can turn into a full-on family standoff, and it all starts with one very specific plan from her dad: vegan turkey. Not a side dish. Not a “try it if you want” situation. He’s showing up with a vegan turkey like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

OP comes from a traditional Thanksgiving crew where everyone pitches in, and the turkey and stuffing are basically the emotional backbone of the day. Her dad, 57, has never been vegan, but now he insists on bringing a vegan turkey anyway, sparking hurt feelings from her mom and calling out from her siblings. Now OP is stuck in the middle, trying to figure out whether saying no will cause a bigger fight than letting him do it.

Here’s the full story of how one meal choice threatens to break the whole holiday vibe.

Original Post

I (28F) come from a traditional family that values classic Thanksgiving dishes. We all pitch in to prepare a feast that includes turkey, stuffing, and all the trimmings.

This year, my dad (57M) recently embraced a vegan lifestyle and announced he intends to bring a vegan turkey to our Thanksgiving dinner. For background, my dad has never been vegan before, and this sudden change left us all surprised.

He's usually a meat lover and thoroughly enjoys our family's roasted turkey. When he shared his plan, it caused quite a stir among us.

My mom, siblings, and I were taken aback by his decision as it contradicts our long-standing Thanksgiving tradition. We value these moments together, and our classic dishes hold sentimental meaning for us.

Despite our concerns, my dad remained adamant about introducing his vegan turkey to the menu.

This led to heated discussions and disagreement within our family. My mom feels hurt that he's rejecting our family traditions, while my siblings think he's being unreasonable with his last-minute changes.

Now, with Thanksgiving approaching, tensions are high. Our family dynamics are strained, and I feel caught in the middle.

If I don't allow him to bring his vegan turkey, it might create further conflict. But letting him disrupt our tradition feels wrong to me.

So, WIBTA for not letting my dad attend Thanksgiving over this vegan turkey dispute? I'm torn and seeking outside perspective.

Can our family reconcile these differences or will this lead to a bigger rift?

Tensions Between Tradition and Change

This Reddit user's dilemma really shines a light on the clash between tradition and modern values, especially in family settings. Thanksgiving has long been a holiday marked by classic dishes, and the idea of a vegan turkey can feel like a direct challenge to those cherished norms. For many, food is more than sustenance; it’s a symbol of family history and unity. So when Dad insists on bringing a vegan turkey, it’s not just about the meal but about the underlying values of respect and acceptance.

This conflict raises an interesting question: can families adapt to new dietary choices while still honoring tradition? The emotional stakes are high, especially when family members feel their identity is at risk. That’s what makes this story resonate; it’s not just about Thanksgiving dinner but about navigating love, acceptance, and change within a family dynamic.

The moment OP’s dad announced he was bringing vegan turkey, the whole family went from “let’s cook” to “wait, what?”

Comment from u/thunderstorm_86

NTA - Thanksgiving is about coming together, not sparking conflicts over meals. Your dad should respect your traditions, especially when it means so much to your family.

Comment from u/PumpkinSpiceQueen

It's your family's tradition, and your dad should've considered that before making such a drastic change. NTA for wanting to preserve what's important to you all.

Comment from u/peanutbutter_jellytime

Honestly, this seems like your dad is trying to make a statement rather than respecting your family's bond. NTA for wanting to keep the peace and stick to your Thanksgiving customs.

Comment from u/catlady_forever42

Thanksgiving is about unity and gratitude, not causing rifts. Your dad should understand the significance of your family's traditions. NTA for wanting to maintain harmony during the holiday.

Her mom felt personally rejected, because to her this isn’t just food, it’s the tradition they’ve built together for years.

Comment from u/StarlitSkies23

If the vegan turkey is causing this much turmoil, it might be best to focus on what brings your family joy and togetherness. NTA for wanting to prioritize your family's Thanksgiving experience.

Also, this echoes the AITA fight where an OP served turkey to her vegan sister, sparking tradition vs dietary rules.

Comment from u/cozyblanketdreams

Your dad should understand the emotional value your family places in your Thanksgiving tradition. NTA for wanting to uphold your family's connection and shared memories.

Comment from u/coffeeaddict_99

NTA - Your dad's sudden insistence on changing a cherished tradition seems disrespectful. Thanksgiving should be about gratitude and unity, not discord over a meal choice.

Meanwhile her siblings are side-eyeing the timing, since this vegan turkey plan landed like a last-minute curveball right before Thanksgiving.

Comment from u/silent_storm_11

Thanksgiving is about celebrating family bonds and shared moments. NTA for wanting to preserve the traditions that hold sentimental value for your family.

Comment from u/music_lover_567

NTA - Your dad's decision seems out of place and is causing unnecessary tension in your family. Preserving your Thanksgiving traditions is important for maintaining your family's bond and joy.

Comment from u/randomuser123

Thanksgiving should be about cherishing family connections and shared memories. NTA for wanting to uphold your family's traditions and values during the holiday season.

Now OP has to decide whether excluding dad means saving the tradition, or just lighting the fuse on a bigger rift at the dinner table.

We're curious to hear your perspective. Share your thoughts in the comments.

The Divided Community Response

The community's reaction to this post is fascinatingly divided. Some commenters vehemently support the idea of excluding Dad, arguing that his insistence on a vegan turkey undermines the spirit of the holiday. Others counter that excluding him would only deepen family rifts and suggest a lack of understanding. This reflects a broader societal debate over dietary choices and the importance of inclusivity versus the preservation of tradition.

In a time when food choices often symbolize deeper ideological divides—like veganism versus meat-eating—this Reddit thread captures the essence of a family struggling to find common ground. Can a compromise be reached, or is this a sign of more profound tensions brewing beneath the surface?

This Thanksgiving conflict underscores the complexities of family dynamics in a rapidly changing world. It poses an essential question: how do we honor tradition while embracing personal choices? The story captures the tug-of-war many families face, making it relatable to anyone navigating similar issues. What do you think? Should family traditions be upheld at all costs, or is it time to adapt to new realities? Share your thoughts!

The Bigger Picture

The tension in this family stems from a clash between long-held traditions and a sudden shift in one member's lifestyle. Dad’s insistence on bringing a vegan turkey not only disrupts the cherished Thanksgiving customs but also seems to challenge the family's collective identity, leaving them feeling hurt and confused. This situation highlights how food often symbolizes deeper family bonds, making it difficult for members to reconcile their values when faced with change. Ultimately, the question remains: can they find a way to honor both tradition and personal choice without damaging their relationships?

The family dinner did not end well, because one vegan turkey turned dad into the problem.

For the secret “turkey recipe” standoff, see what happened when a husband’s vegan sister got involved in the debate.