Should We Return Our Newly Adopted Pet Because of Allergies?
Discover the moral dilemma faced by a couple who must decide between keeping a newly adopted pet or prioritizing a partner's severe allergies – WIBTA?
A 28-year-old woman and her 31-year-old partner thought they finally nailed it when they adopted a dog they both loved. Weeks of breed research, shelter visits, and pure excitement led to one big moment, the kind you want to keep forever.
Then the sneezing started. Constant sneezing, itchy eyes, and even moments where her partner had trouble breathing. It wasn’t a mild annoyance either, it was turning the new, happy chapter into a real health threat, right after they brought the dog home.
Now she’s stuck between protecting her partner and breaking the heart of a dog they already bonded with, and everyone involved is hurting.
Original Post
So I'm (28F) and my partner (31M) decided to adopt a new pet dog from the shelter. We were both thrilled about the idea of having a furry companion in our home.
We spent weeks researching breeds, visiting shelters, and finally found the perfect dog for us. Here's where the issue arises - shortly after bringing the dog home, my partner started showing signs of allergies.
Constant sneezing, itchy eyes, and even difficulty breathing at times.
For background, my partner has always loved animals, and this adoption was a significant step for us. However, his health is now at risk due to the allergies caused by the dog.
I'm torn between keeping the pet we both fell in love with and prioritizing my partner's health. On one hand, I want to respect his well-being and comfort, but on the other hand, returning the dog feels like giving up on our shared dream.
I've discussed this with my partner, and he's torn as well. He doesn't want to be the reason we have to give up the dog, but his allergies are becoming unbearable.
So, would I be the a*****e if I decided to return the newly adopted pet due to my partner's allergies, even though we both wanted a pet so badly? I honestly don't know what to do.
Would I be the a*****e here?
The Tough Call Between Love and Responsibility
This couple's dilemma strikes a chord because it highlights the emotional tug-of-war between love for a new pet and the harsh realities of health issues. The original poster’s excitement about adopting a dog is palpable, yet it quickly clashes with her partner's severe allergies, creating a heartbreaking scenario. This situation isn’t just about choosing a pet; it’s about weighing the joy of companionship against the potential health risks that could significantly affect one partner’s quality of life.
It’s a stark reminder that not all dreams come without complications. Readers are likely torn, feeling both sympathy for the pet’s plight and understanding for the partner’s health concerns. This conflict resonates on multiple levels, emphasizing the sacrifices we often have to make for our loved ones.
Comment from u/Rainbow_Dreamer19

Comment from u/DogLover365

Comment from u/AdventureSeeker88
Right after the adoption high, the partner’s constant sneezing and itchy eyes were the first sign this dog might not be the happy ending they pictured.
Community Divided: Pet Lovers vs. Allergy Sufferers
The reactions from the Reddit community reveal just how divided perspectives can be on pet adoption. For some, the emotional bond with a pet is irreplaceable, and they argue that giving up the dog would be a mistake. Others advocate for the partner's health, suggesting that it’s unreasonable to prioritize a pet over severe allergies. This difference in opinion underscores a broader societal debate about the responsibilities that come with pet ownership.
What makes it even more interesting is the personal anecdotes shared in the comments. Many readers shared their own experiences with allergies or pet ownership, adding layers of complexity to the discussion. The nuances of each stance show that this isn’t a black-and-white issue but a complex moral dilemma that many can relate to.
Comment from u/NatureLover22
Comment from u/LoyalCompanion77
Comment from u/AdventureAwaits99
The situation got uglier fast when his allergies escalated to difficulty breathing, and suddenly the dream felt like it could cost him his health.
It’s a lot like the allergic partner weighing whether to rehome their beloved cat, even against their wishes: Conflicted: Allergic Partner Considering Rehoming Beloved Pet - WIBTA?.
OP keeps weighing the guilt of “giving up” the dog against the fact that her partner doesn’t want to be the reason they have to return him.
The Moral Grey Area of Pet Ownership
This story also taps into the moral grey area surrounding pet adoption. The couple's situation exemplifies the often-overlooked realities that accompany bringing a pet into a home. While the excitement of adopting a dog can overshadow potential complications, this couple’s experience serves as a sobering reminder that pets require not just love but also a suitable environment. Allergies can be severe and life-altering, and ignoring them can lead to bigger problems down the line.
The couple’s journey raises questions about responsibility and commitment. Are they bound to keep the pet regardless of the consequences? Or does prioritizing health over companionship indicate a lack of commitment? There’s no easy answer, and that’s what makes this story so compelling.
Comment from u/PetLover2000
Comment from u/AdventureJunkie42
Comment from u/SunshineExplorer18
With both of them torn, the question turns into whether returning the newly adopted dog is the only way to stop the breathing issues from getting worse.
The Emotional Toll of This Decision
Deciding whether to return the newly adopted dog can be emotionally devastating. The original poster's heartfelt struggle reflects the psychological weight of such choices, where both partners have valid points. It’s not just about the pet; it’s about the commitments made to each other. As the couple navigates this dilemma, their relationship dynamics come into play, highlighting the pressure of making a choice that could impact their future together.
Readers might find themselves thinking about the emotional toll on all parties involved—the couple, the pet, and the wider family they’ve created.
Comment from u/PuppyLoveForever
What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments.
Why This Story Matters
This story showcases the complex emotions tied to pet ownership and the difficult decisions that can arise.
Nobody wants to be the villain in a shelter return, but breathing comes first.
Before you decide, read whether someone is the asshole for adopting despite severe allergies.