Struggling Friend Refuses Pregnancy Advice: AITA for Setting Boundaries?
"Struggling with fertility issues, I set boundaries with a friend seeking pregnancy advice - AITA for prioritizing my well-being over her constant demands?"
Some people don’t recognize a favor, even when you’ve been doing it for years. In this Reddit post, a 27-year-old woman tries to set limits with her longtime friend, Anna, after Anna’s pregnancy turns into a nonstop hotline for everything from what to eat to which prenatal vitamins to buy.
At first, OP was happy to help. Then it escalated into constant messages, pregnancy updates, and requests that make it feel like Anna expects 24/7 availability. The complication? OP has dealt with fertility struggles for years, so watching Anna conceive easily hits way too close to home.
Now the question is whether OP is “unsupportive and selfish,” or if Anna is the one pushing too hard.
Original Post
So, I'm a 27-year-old woman, and I've been friends with 'Anna' for over a decade. Anna recently found out she's pregnant, and since then, she's been bombarding me with requests for pregnancy advice.
She's constantly messaging me about what to eat, how to deal with morning sickness, even which prenatal vitamins to take. At first, I was happy to help, but it's gotten out of hand.
It's like she expects me to be available 24/7 for all her pregnancy queries. For background, I've struggled with fertility issues for years, and seeing Anna easily conceive has been tough for me.
Her constant stream of questions and updates about her pregnancy feels like rubbing salt in the wound. I've politely told her that I need some space and that I'm not comfortable giving her advice anymore.
However, she's now upset, calling me unsupportive and selfish for not being there for her during this crucial time. She says that as her friend, I should be more understanding and willing to help.
But it's taking a toll on my mental health, and I feel like I need to prioritize my own well-being. So, AITA for setting this boundary with her?
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This is similar to the best friend debate over unsolicited pregnancy advice, where the real question is whether to push healthy habits.
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OP tried to stay kind at the beginning, but Anna kept sliding into her DMs with morning sickness tips and vitamin questions like it was her personal pregnancy group chat.
The real gut punch is that OP’s own fertility issues make every new pregnancy update from Anna feel like a fresh reminder.
OP finally said she needed space, and that’s when Anna flipped it into a guilt trip, calling her unsupportive for not showing up “during this crucial time.”
Now OP is stuck wondering if setting boundaries is actually selfish, or if Anna is treating her like an always-on support system.
What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments.
OP might be the problem in Anna’s eyes, but her boundaries sound a lot more reasonable than Anna’s nonstop demands.
Wondering if you’re the jerk for setting boundaries with Anna’s nonstop pregnancy demands? Read this AITA about a demanding pregnant friend.
