Redditors Roast A User Who Isn't Willing To Perform Household Chores Now That He's Retired While His Wife Is Working

Whether women like it or not, men will always complain about doing chores at home. Aside from being repetitive, there's no real accomplishment because what gets cleaned eventually gets dirty.

Despite women's achievements in school and work, they still perform a larger portion of household tasks than men. On average, women spend around one hour and 20 minutes a day on housework.

In contrast, men only spend 30 minutes doing these duties. If you look at it, that's roughly one-third of the time women spend on household tasks.

But what if the roles of a married couple were reversed? Specifically, what if the man doesn't have a job, and the woman is currently in the workforce?

Would the man be willing to perform all of those tasks? Unfortunately, a Reddit user named Ashamed_To_Say_ does not want to.

Even though his wife did everything for him for the past 47 years, he's not willing to learn anything. And even if he's unemployed, he still wants to split the tasks between himself and his working wife.

This user eventually decided to ask the AITA subreddit if he's an asshole for not being able to do what his wife did for 47 years. Let's see how Redditors responded.

He's not even trying.

Reddit

He explains the situation further.

Reddit

The expectation is only natural. After all, he doesn't have a job.

Reddit

Understanding Resistance to Household Chores

The reluctance to share household responsibilities, especially after retirement, can often stem from long-standing behavioral patterns.

Research indicates that ingrained habits from decades of traditional gender roles can create friction between partners.

Dr. Ellen Smith, a marriage and family therapist, notes that when one partner transitions into retirement, it can lead to a reevaluation of previously established roles, causing stress and tension in the relationship.

The Dynamics of Chores in Relationships

The conflict surrounding household responsibilities, particularly in long-term relationships, often stems from deeply ingrained societal norms. Research highlights that traditional gender roles frequently dictate the division of labor within households, which can lead to frustration when expectations aren't met. A study from the National Institute of Health indicates that couples who adhere to rigid gender roles may struggle to communicate effectively about their needs and contributions.

This disconnect can create resentment, particularly if one partner feels overburdened or taken for granted, as appears to be the case in this scenario.

Most users on Reddit find his reasoning utterly absurd.

Reddit

In a traditional home, this is what men do.

Reddit

Anybody can learn how to do household chores. This man just wasn't willing to.

Reddit

According to a study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family, the division of household labor remains a significant source of conflict in many relationships.

When one partner does not adjust their contribution to align with changing circumstances, it can lead to feelings of resentment and imbalance.

Addressing this requires open communication and a willingness to renegotiate roles based on current realities rather than historical norms.

From a psychological perspective, the reluctance to share household chores can often reflect deeper issues of power dynamics within the relationship. Research in the field of social psychology suggests that when one partner consistently avoids responsibilities, it can lead to feelings of inequality and frustration for the other. Such dynamics can exacerbate feelings of anger and dissatisfaction, potentially leading to larger conflicts.

Establishing clear communication and expectations around chores can help mitigate these issues, fostering a sense of teamwork and partnership.

Entitled men indeed pervade his generation.

Reddit

Sometimes, only women are willing to sacrifice.

Reddit

It really is a poor excuse.

Reddit

The Psychology of Resentment in Relationships

Resentment often builds when expectations are not met in relationships, particularly regarding shared responsibilities.

Research shows that when individuals feel their contributions are undervalued, it can lead to emotional withdrawal and conflict.

Implementing regular check-ins about household responsibilities can help mitigate these feelings, ensuring both partners feel heard and valued.

The Role of Retirement in Household Dynamics

Retirement can significantly alter the dynamics of household roles, as one partner may suddenly have more time and flexibility while the other continues to work. This shift can create an imbalance in perceived contributions, leading to conflict. Studies show that retired individuals often experience a change in identity, which can influence their views on household responsibilities.

Encouraging retirees to engage in shared household duties can help establish a new sense of purpose and involvement, ultimately benefiting the relationship.

Then he has to learn everything. You can't expect wives to do everything.

Reddit

His wife didn't split the tasks when she was the one doing the chores. Expecting her to do half of the tasks while she has a full-time job isn't fair at all.

Reddit

You tell him!

Reddit

Additionally, it's essential to recognize that resistance to performing household chores may be tied to underlying psychological factors, such as fear of losing autonomy or a desire to maintain traditional roles. Research indicates that individuals may cling to certain behaviors as a way to assert their identity, especially during significant life changes like retirement.

Encouraging open dialogue about feelings surrounding these changes can provide clarity and foster a more cooperative approach to household responsibilities.

Lazy is the best word to describe this man.

Reddit

The husband's reasoning is illogical.

Reddit

It's a matter of adapting to the current situation, according to this redditor.

Reddit

All he needs to do is start learning.

Reddit

He was never fair in the first place.

Reddit

The husband needs to put himself in his wife's shoes.

Reddit

Google is the answer, even for lazy, entitled men.

Reddit

Even other men his age know how to run the house.

Reddit

It seems that the original poster isn't aware of what's fair.

Reddit

The internet has loads of household work tips that he can use.

Reddit

Tips for organizing one's home

Reddit

There are also tips for cooking. Literally every topic can be found online.

Reddit

It's never too late to start learning about performing household chores effectively.

Reddit

With his reasoning and other excuses, he's truly the mega-AH.

Reddit

Weaponized incompetence is real. The original poster is living proof.

Reddit

We all agree.

Reddit

Nobody is siding with the original poster at this point.

Reddit

It's true that women have higher standards when it comes to household chores.

But everything can be learned, just like what most Reddit users agree on. The internet isn't just a place for complaining.

It's a great tool for learning. If the husband is worried that he isn't as good as his wife in terms of household duties, then all he needs to do is watch tutorials online and apply what he has learned.

Psychological Analysis

The situation described highlights common issues related to power dynamics in relationships, especially as they shift during retirement. It's not unusual for one partner to feel overwhelmed when the other is resistant to contributing equally. Addressing these feelings through open communication can lead to healthier dynamics and greater satisfaction for both partners.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Understanding the interplay between societal norms, personal identity, and relationship dynamics is crucial in addressing conflicts around household responsibilities. By fostering open communication and a spirit of collaboration, couples can work towards a balanced partnership that honors both partners’ contributions. Ultimately, recognizing and addressing these underlying issues can lead to a more harmonious living environment.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Conflict over household chores can be a reflection of deeper relational dynamics.

Psychological research consistently emphasizes the importance of communication and adaptability in resolving these issues.

Couples who actively engage in discussions about expectations and responsibilities are more likely to find harmony in their relationship.