Am I Wrong for Not Letting Sister-in-Law Plan Babys First Birthday?

AITA for not letting sister-in-law plan baby's first birthday? Expecting parents clash with controlling SIL over party planning dominance, seeking advice.

Davy

Published in Interesting
August 9, 2025

Am I Wrong for Not Letting Sister-in-Law Plan Babys First Birthday?

Are you the jerk for not wanting your sister-in-law to plan your baby's first birthday party? Picture this: you're expecting your first child, and the excitement is palpable.

But here's the twist - your sister-in-law, who has a reputation for being a bit of a control freak when it comes to event planning, eagerly volunteers to take charge of the big day. You, however, prefer to call the shots when it comes to organizing celebrations, maintaining your unique style and preferences.

Politely declining her offer, you express your desire to lead the planning process. But Sarah is not having it; she feels entitled as the aunt to orchestrate every detail to perfection.

Despite your attempts to explain, she takes offense, labeling you as unappreciative and disregarding her efforts to help. The situation escalates as she involves other family members, painting you as the party pooper.

As tensions rise, your husband suggests letting Sarah plan the party to prevent further conflict. Yet, you stand torn between keeping the peace and asserting your autonomy over your child's milestone celebration.

Are you really in the wrong here? Let's dive into the thread and explore the judgments and advice pouring in from fellow Redditors.

Original Post

So I'm (27F) and my husband (30M) are expecting our first child, and we're thrilled about it. Quick context, my sister-in-law, let's call her Sarah, is very controlling and tends to take over events she plans.

She means well, but her way or the highway attitude can be overbearing. For background, my husband and I have always been the ones to plan our own celebrations, and we like it that way.

Recently, Sarah excitedly offered to plan our baby's first birthday party. While it was a kind gesture, I prefer organizing things myself to ensure they align with our style and preferences.

I kindly declined her offer, explaining that we'd love for her to be involved but want to take the lead. However, Sarah seemed offended and insisted that as the aunt, she should handle all details to make the day perfect.

I reiterated our stance, but she's now upset, claiming I'm being ungrateful and not valuing her efforts. She even told other family members that I don't appreciate her help.

Now, my husband thinks we should let Sarah plan the party to avoid drama, but I feel it's our child's milestone, and we should have the final say. I'm torn between keeping the peace and standing my ground.

So AITA?