Am I Wrong for Not Sharing My Apartment with Sister-in-Law?

Some people don’t recognize a favor, and this family might be about to learn that the hard way. OP (23) finally got their own apartment and started living alone in January, and for once, it’s not a “borrowed space” situation or a “just until” situation. It’s theirs.

Then the sister-in-law plot twist hits. SIL (25) got a new job, it’s closer to OP’s apartment, so she asked OP’s sister to talk to their dad, and somehow OP never gets a direct conversation. OP’s parents bring up the idea during a visit, OP dodges, says “no” when they get home, and now OP is sitting there confused and annoyed that SIL seems to have heard everything secondhand.

OP reached out to SIL to explain, and radio silence followed, so now they’re wondering if refusing to share their apartment makes them the villain, or if the family just overstepped.

Original Post

I(23) got an apartment and started living alone January this year.

They’re doing quite well so living with them is almost a luxury but it’s a little bit like a dictatorship and I just wanna be an adult lol. And no, I have no issues with my parents as I visit regularly.

Just a little context. So my SIL(25) got a new job and it’s closer to where I live than where she lives currently with her Parents so she spoke to my sister and she reached out to our Dad.

My sister didn’t talk to me herself because she never liked the idea of me living alone so asking me herself would be like she’s finally seeing an advantage of me living alone lol so she had Dad do it. Last weekend when I visited, my parents brought up the idea of letting my SIL share my apartment, I avoided the conversation as much as I could and only told them I’ll think about it when I was leaving.

When I got back home I called and told them I had no intention of sharing my apartment with anyone. That conversation went just ‘as well’ as I thought it would.

Mind you everyone knows why I decided to live alone so I feel like my SIL speaking to every other person about this except me is a bit insulting. We talk, not very often but we do so I think she should’ve spoken to me directly about this and honestly I’d consider but having my parents do that when all I’m trying to avoid is them dictating what I do and don’t doesn’t sit well with me.

I reached out to her on Sunday evening to explain my reasons as I’m sure they must have relayed to her that I said No, I got no response. Sent another text on Monday and still no response.

So I’m here wondering if I’m the a*****e for refusing to share my apartment because she didn’t speak with me directly.

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Also, if you think splitting assets always works, see the siblings fighting over Grandma’s piano in an AITA equal-split showdown.

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OP’s whole “living alone is my luxury” vibe gets interrupted the moment SIL’s new job becomes the reason everyone thinks the apartment should be shared.

The real problem is how OP’s sister went through dad instead of talking to OP directly, like OP is supposed to accept orders for their own space.

After OP said “no” over the phone, OP tried to clear things up by texting SIL, and the lack of any reply makes it feel even more insulting.

Now the family dinner energy is gone, and OP is left staring at unanswered messages from SIL, wondering if everyone else already decided how this story ends.

How would you handle this situation? Let us know in the comments.

OP might not be wrong, but this family sure is acting like their apartment is community property.

Before you decide, read the OP who had to choose between a family heirloom watch and charity.