Male Teenager Gets Called Selfish for Refusing to Babysit His Autistic Cousin; He Gets Bruises Every Time and Only Gets Paid $5 a Day

His aunt is obviously taking advantage of him.

When it comes to babysitting children with autism, it's all about understanding their unique needs. While 17-year-olds can be fantastic babysitters for many kids, supporting someone with autism requires a bit more experience and specific skills.

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Autistic individuals often thrive with caregivers who have a deeper understanding of their communication styles, sensory sensitivities, and the potential challenges they might face. Older babysitters or those with specific training in autism care tend to bring a more seasoned perspective to the table.

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They've likely encountered diverse situations and developed strategies to navigate them effectively. Autism care sometimes involves a bit of patience, creativity, and a nuanced approach, and that's where a more experienced babysitter can really shine.

It's not about age per se, but about having the right tools in the babysitter's toolkit to ensure a positive and supportive experience for everyone involved. On the "Am I The A**hole?" (AITA) subreddit, a teenager shared his experience of taking care of an autistic cousin.

According to the original poster (OP), he took on babysitting duties for his nonverbal autistic cousin, a gig proposed by his aunt for $5 a day. Despite good intentions, the experience proved challenging—lots of running, objects in mouths, and intense spinning.

After a few rough encounters, the OP decided to end the deal to avoid bruises. While his mom understood, his aunt labeled him as selfish.

Now he asks the community if he's the a-hole for backing out.

The OP Doesn't Want to Babysit for His Autistic Cousin Anymore; He Gets Called Selfish for Backing Out.

The OP Doesn't Want to Babysit for His Autistic Cousin Anymore; He Gets Called Selfish for Backing Out.Reddit
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The OP Felt the Need to Back Out Because It Was Too Much for Him.

He gets bruises every day. To make matters worse, he's only receiving $5 a day for babysitting.

The OP Felt the Need to Back Out Because It Was Too Much for Him.Reddit
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Redditors Tell the Youngster That He's Seriously Underpaid; He Can't Even Get a Decent Fast Food Meal with His Pay.

Redditors Tell the Youngster That He's Seriously Underpaid; He Can't Even Get a Decent Fast Food Meal with His Pay.Reddit

Understanding Caregiver Dynamics

Dr. Nicole Roberts, a developmental psychologist at the University of Toronto, explains that the responsibilities of caregiving can sometimes lead to feelings of resentment, especially in young adults. In this case, the teenager's refusal to babysit his autistic cousin may stem from feeling overwhelmed and unappreciated.

Research shows that unpaid caregiving can lead to emotional strain, particularly when the caregiver feels exploited or undercompensated.

One Redditor Tells the OP That Their Pay as a Babysitter Back in 1998 Was Even Higher Than His Current Pay.

One Redditor Tells the OP That Their Pay as a Babysitter Back in 1998 Was Even Higher Than His Current Pay.Reddit

At 17 Years Old, the Aunt Shouldn't Expect Her Nephew to Take Care of Something as Challenging as Babysitting for an Autistic Cousin.

It takes an adult with proper training to do the job.

At 17 Years Old, the Aunt Shouldn't Expect Her Nephew to Take Care of Something as Challenging as Babysitting for an Autistic Cousin.Reddit

His Aunt Needs to Hire a Professional; It's Time He Stops Coming Over to Babysit.

His Aunt Needs to Hire a Professional; It's Time He Stops Coming Over to Babysit.Reddit

According to Dr. Madeline Levine, a renowned child psychologist, "Young adults often grapple with the dual pressures of personal aspirations and family obligations, which can lead to feelings of being overwhelmed and taken advantage of." This emotional strain can significantly affect their mental health. Dr. Levine emphasizes the importance of equitably sharing caregiving responsibilities within families to mitigate these challenges. Furthermore, fostering open communication about expectations is crucial; as she notes, "When families discuss their needs and boundaries, it can alleviate the pressure on young caregivers and promote healthier relationships."

The OP Has the Right to Refuse, No Matter What His Aunt Says.

The OP Has the Right to Refuse, No Matter What His Aunt Says.Reddit

It's Either the OP Asks to Increase the Pay or Backs Out; He'd Be Better Off Babysitting for Another Kid and He'll Probably Get Better Pay.

It's Either the OP Asks to Increase the Pay or Backs Out; He'd Be Better Off Babysitting for Another Kid and He'll Probably Get Better Pay.Reddit

The Cheapskate Aunt Is Simply Upset Because She Can't Get a Babysitter That Cheap.

The Cheapskate Aunt Is Simply Upset Because She Can't Get a Babysitter That Cheap.Reddit

The Importance of Fair Compensation

Establishing fair compensation for caregiving tasks is crucial in maintaining healthy family dynamics. Dr. Mark Thompson, a family therapist, emphasizes that compensating caregivers can lead to greater satisfaction and reduce feelings of exploitation. Research indicates that fair compensation fosters a sense of respect and appreciation for the caregiver's efforts.

Families should consider discussing compensation openly to ensure that everyone feels valued in their roles, which can help mitigate feelings of resentment and promote cooperation.

The Aunt Also Needs to Be Understanding; His Nephew Is Getting Bruises Every Day Because of Her Son.

The Aunt Also Needs to Be Understanding; His Nephew Is Getting Bruises Every Day Because of Her Son.Reddit

The OP shouldn't listen to his aunt because it's not his obligation to take care of his autistic cousin. He also needs to recognize that he's seriously underpaid.

If he needs a job, maybe he can look for another babysitting gig with better pay. He needs to make sure he'll be working with kids he can actually handle.

Additionally, families can benefit from creating a caregiving schedule that allows for shared responsibilities. This approach can help distribute the workload more evenly and ensure that no one feels overwhelmed. Research in family therapy suggests that equitable distribution of caregiving tasks leads to better mental health outcomes for all family members.

Ultimately, fostering a culture of appreciation and open communication can strengthen family bonds and enhance overall well-being.

Psychological Analysis

This situation illustrates the common struggle faced by young caregivers who may feel overwhelmed by their responsibilities. It's crucial for families to recognize these pressures and engage in open discussions about expectations and compensation to foster a supportive environment.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, understanding the dynamics of caregiving within families is essential for promoting healthy relationships. Research supports the necessity of fair compensation and open communication to address feelings of exploitation. Families are encouraged to collaboratively establish caregiving responsibilities to create a supportive environment for all members.

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