Manager Instructs Waitress To Leave The New Girl Stranded And Threatens To Withhold Her Tips, Regrets It When Things Start Getting Out Of Hand

Respect is something that should always be earned, never given. When it comes to the relationship between a manager and their employees, this is especially true. According to Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a relationship therapist, "Healthy workplace dynamics are built on mutual respect and support." Reddit user u/alexann23 recently shared a story in the Malicious Compliance subreddit about her experience working in a busy restaurant. The 17-year-old works as a server and cashier at an Italian eatery chain in the US. The OP explained that she had recently returned to work after taking some time off for health reasons. During her absence, the restaurant made some changes and hired new staff. During a particularly busy shift, the Redditor said she was happy to help out one of the new waitresses, who was only a few days into her training at that point. However, her manager had other ideas. The manager instructed the OP to stay behind the counter and leave the new girl to struggle alone on the floor. She even threatened to withhold the OP's tips if she didn't comply. The OP reluctantly did as she was told, but things quickly started to spiral out of control. The new waitress was flustered and confused, in desperate need of guidance. When the manager realized that she had made a mistake, she quickly backpedaled and expected the OP to clean up the mess. However, the OP responded by saying that she couldn't help because she couldn't afford to lose her tips. The best part of this story is that a customer later called to complain about how hard the OP and the other waitress were being worked while the manager and her friend were just "sitting on their phones" the whole time. Understandably, the whole situation has left the OP feeling deflated. "I've been avoiding work," the Redditor said. "I have my eighteenth birthday on January nineteenth, and right now, I'm a homeless 17-year-old." The OP is currently living off the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program but is struggling to make ends meet. "I called off 'sick,' and my main manager hasn't gotten back to me yet," the Redditor explained. "I have pretty severe mental health issues, so I've just been doing a lot of couch surfing at friends' houses and living off of $150/month SNAP," she said. It's a tough situation for the young woman. If you would like to give her some support, you can do so through resources suggested by Tony Robbins. Keep scrolling to see how people reacted.

The OP shared a story about her experience working as a server and cashier at a busy restaurant.

Reddit/alexann23

She explained she has only been working there for a short time but was able to pick things up quickly.

Reddit/alexann23

During a particularly busy shift, the Redditor said she was happy to help out one of the new waitresses who was only a few days into her training at that point.

Reddit/alexann23

Understanding Managerial Mistakes

Dr. Amy Edmondson from Harvard Business School emphasizes the importance of psychological safety in teams. When a manager makes a decision that undermines team members, it can create a culture of fear and resentment. This is particularly true when employees feel they’re being set up to fail, as seen in the situation described.

Research shows that when employees feel their contributions are undervalued or that they’re being unfairly treated, engagement drops significantly. This often results in a cycle of blame and disengagement, which can be detrimental to team dynamics and overall productivity.

The Consequences of Leadership Styles

The incident described reflects the profound impact that leadership styles have on team dynamics. According to Dr. Daniel Goleman's research on emotional intelligence, authoritarian leadership can lead to environments filled with fear and resentment. When managers use intimidation tactics, it can create a toxic work culture that stifles creativity and collaboration. Understanding these dynamics is crucial for fostering a positive workplace environment where all employees feel valued and motivated.

The other people on shift that day were the manager and another employee.

Reddit/alexann23

The OP explained that the managers are supposed to help serve as well.

Reddit/alexann23

But the manager and the other employee were not helping at all.

Reddit/alexann23

The manager's initial decision to leave the new girl stranded reflects a lack of empathy, which is crucial for effective leadership according to Dr. Brené Brown's research on vulnerability and trust. When leaders fail to consider the emotional consequences of their actions, it not only affects the individual employee but also the entire team's morale.

Encouraging open communication and actively seeking feedback from team members can mitigate such missteps. Managers should practice transparency and acknowledge their mistakes, fostering an environment where everyone feels valued and included.

In situations like this, the psychological principle of social learning theory becomes relevant. This theory posits that people learn behaviors through observation and imitation. If employees witness their manager behaving in a hostile manner, they may feel justified in mirroring that behavior, leading to a cycle of negativity. This highlights the importance of modeling positive behavior in leadership roles.

They were sitting down chatting and on their phones while customers waited to be served.

Reddit/alexann23

The manager then instructed the OP to stay behind the counter and leave the new girl to struggle alone on the floor. She even threatened to withhold the OP's tips if she didn't comply.

Reddit/alexann23

She wasn't really given a choice.

Reddit/alexann23

The Role of Feedback in Leadership

Research published in the Academy of Management Journal indicates that leaders who solicit feedback from their team members create a more collaborative and trusting work environment. This aligns with the concept of servant leadership, where the leader's primary role is to support and empower their team.

When employees feel heard and respected, their commitment to the team's goals increases, leading to greater overall success. Strategies like regular check-ins and anonymous feedback mechanisms can help leaders gauge team sentiment and adjust their approaches accordingly.

The Importance of a Supportive Work Environment

A supportive work environment is essential for employee well-being and productivity. Research from Gallup has shown that employees who feel supported are significantly less likely to experience burnout and job dissatisfaction. Creating a culture of support involves encouraging open communication and recognizing employee contributions, which can mitigate feelings of isolation and resentment. This approach not only enhances morale but also promotes a sense of belonging within the team.

The OP reluctantly did as she was told, but things quickly started to spiral out of control.

Reddit/alexann23

When the manager realized that she had made a mistake, she quickly backpedaled and expected the OP to clean up the mess.

Reddit/alexann23

But the OP responded by saying that she couldn't help because she couldn't afford to lose her tips.

Reddit/alexann23

Furthermore, Dr. Daniel Goleman’s work on emotional intelligence highlights that effective leaders must cultivate self-awareness, empathy, and social skills. By understanding their own emotional responses and those of their team, leaders can navigate challenges more effectively and maintain a positive team dynamic.

Training in emotional intelligence can equip managers with the tools needed to handle difficult situations with grace and understanding, reducing the likelihood of conflict and miscommunication.

Furthermore, addressing conflicts promptly is crucial for maintaining team cohesion. Studies indicate that unresolved conflicts can lead to decreased productivity and increased turnover rates. Organizations should implement conflict resolution frameworks that empower employees to address issues constructively. This can include mediation services or conflict management training that equips employees with the skills to navigate disputes effectively.

But the manager still didn't bother to help either of the waitresses.

Reddit/alexann23

The best part of this story is that a customer later called to complain about how hard the OP and the other waitress were being worked when the manager and her friend were just "sitting on their phones" the whole time.

Reddit/alexann23

TL;DR.

Reddit/alexann23

Practical Solutions for Managers

To prevent incidents like the one described, managers should undergo training in emotional intelligence and effective communication. Dr. Brené Brown’s research emphasizes the importance of vulnerability and trust in leadership. By allowing themselves to be vulnerable and approachable, leaders can foster an environment where employees feel safe to voice their concerns. Additionally, regular feedback sessions can help identify potential issues before they escalate, promoting a proactive approach to conflict management.

The OP later updated her original post.

Reddit/alexann23

She apologized for her "odd" English (not that we even noticed it).

Reddit/alexann23

She also mentioned that she is desperately looking for another job and wants to report her situation to the authorities.

Reddit/alexann23

Here's how people reacted.

Reddit/Chelular07, Reddit/alexann23

The cameras magically "stop working."

Reddit/Jordangander, Reddit/alexann23

Report them!

Reddit/Truuuuuumpet, Reddit/alexann23

"That's illegal."

Reddit/SkyLegend1337, Reddit/alexann23

"What the hell kind of bull**** is that?"

Reddit/Turtlelover73, Reddit/alexann23

"Restaurant managers are the worst!"

Reddit/Snoo49732, Reddit/alexann23

They can't do that!

Reddit/The1983Jedi, Reddit/alexann23

"Get a job literally anywhere else."

Reddit/FrozenEagles, Reddit/alexann23

Someone, please explain this.

Reddit/Platypus-Man, Reddit/alexann23

The DMV area?

Reddit/AgonizingFury, Reddit/alexann23

The cellphone curse.

Reddit/duffelbagpete, Reddit/alexann23

What's your take on this situation? Do you think the OP is overreacting, or is she well within her rights to be upset about the way she has been treated?

Everyone deserves to be treated with respect, whether you're a manager, employee, or customer. So, it seems the OP's manager is the one who has some lessons to learn in this scenario.

We would love to hear your opinions on this. You can share your thoughts with us in the comment section.

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the detrimental effects of poor leadership on team dynamics. When managers resort to intimidation, it can create an environment of fear that stifles cooperation and breeds resentment among employees.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, leadership approaches significantly shape workplace culture and employee experiences. By fostering supportive environments and promoting open communication, organizations can mitigate conflicts and enhance overall satisfaction. It's essential for leaders to recognize their influence and commit to creating positive, inclusive workplaces.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, leadership mistakes can have far-reaching consequences on team morale and productivity. Studies indicate that fostering an environment of psychological safety and open communication is essential for mitigating misunderstandings and enhancing team cohesion. By adopting these practices, managers can create a workplace culture that values cooperation and respect, ultimately leading to improved outcomes for everyone involved.