Lady Gets Mocked "Jokingly" Again And Again By Future BIL, Makes A Decision Regarding The Wedding

A 28-year-old woman says her future brother-in-law has been “joking” in the cruelest possible way, and it finally pushed her to make a decision about the wedding. The comments were not cute, not playful, and not the kind of thing you can just “let it go.” One line hit especially hard: “If you became a psychiatrist, you’d make your patients want to kill themselves,” said to OP, like it was harmless banter.

Here’s what makes it messy, her sister’s fiancé keeps talking like this, and then everyone acts like OP is the problem for being bothered. OP is stuck in a family loop where her education and career get mocked, her GPA and school choices get treated like a punchline, and she’s expected to show up anyway, smile through it, and support the same wedding that’s built on constant digs.

And when OP refuses to attend, the whole family suddenly wants to rewrite the story as “just humor.”

“If you became a psychiatrist, you’d make your patients want to kill themselves" - what OP's soon-to-be BIL told her

Reddit

The OP is grateful the U.S. has schools that accept students with lower GPAs

Reddit

“You know you’re supposed to know these things as a doctor"

Reddit

When the future BIL told OP she’d make patients want to kill themselves, the “joking” excuse should have died right there, but it kept coming.

Psychologists emphasize that humor can be a double-edged sword in interpersonal relationships.

Family dynamics can complicate the interpretation of humor, leading to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

The OP doesn’t want to be around people who make fun of her and then act like it’s humor

Reddit

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the AH:

I might be the AH because I refused to attend my sister’s wedding, which could make me look petty or unsupportive. My family thinks I should just “let it go” and be there for her despite the comments. I understand it’s a big day for her, so maybe I overreacted by deciding not to go instead of trying to move past it.

And the comments roll in...

Reddit

The sister's fiance is being a jerk

Reddit

Communication specialists emphasize expressing feelings without blame.

Another “don’t try to fix it” moment, this time with the lady blocking tip pooling.

The OP can go to her sister's next wedding

Reddit

He can't climb up the status ladder by bringing someone down

Reddit

They are jealous of OP's education and career

Reddit

Once OP realized her family expected her to be there anyway, she drew a line and decided not to attend the wedding her sister insisted on.

Clinical psychologists recognize that belittling comments can have long-lasting effects on self-esteem and mental health. Such remarks can create feelings of inadequacy, leading to anxiety and depression.

To address this, individuals are encouraged to practice self-compassion and assertiveness.

Building a supportive network is equally important, as it reinforces positive self-image and resilience.

The OP has a horrible family

Reddit

The OP needs to start curating her own comebacks

Reddit

The OP does not need to be around people who belittle her

Reddit

Now that OP is the “petty” one in their version of events, everyone is scrambling to convince her to show up to the next round of status-ladder bullying.

Communication experts argue that addressing hurtful humor promptly can prevent escalation and foster mutual respect.

In OP's case, her decision to not attend the wedding is a personal choice to protect herself from further hurt. It's essential to recognize that everyone deserves respect and kindness, and it's okay to prioritize one's own needs.

The family's perception of OP as dramatic or selfish is misguided. OP is only standing up for herself, refusing to tolerate disrespect and hurtful comments.

It's not about OP making the wedding about herself; it's about standing up for herself and setting boundaries. If her family doesn't understand that, it might be a sign of a larger issue.

This situation highlights how people often mask their insecurities through humor, which can come off as belittling to others. The fiancé’s comments likely stem from his own issues with self-esteem or jealousy, particularly regarding OP’s education and career ambitions. When family members dismiss OP’s feelings, it reflects a common pattern where individuals prioritize social harmony over genuine emotional support, leaving the hurt party feeling isolated and invalidated.

The challenge of navigating hurtful humor is prevalent in many relationships and can lead to significant emotional distress.

The wedding might be the big day, but OP’s peace is the real prize here.

Before you judge the wedding jokes, see how a diner demanded a 25% mandatory tip.