Mom Protects Her Pre-Teen Daughter From Her Body-Shaming Grandma Who's Asking For Her Measurements

Body shaming is unacceptable. Gone are the days when people freely and boldly commented on another person's size, shape, and weight; well, mostly anyway, but it's a start.

Sadly, many body issues and eating disorders can be traced back to our childhood. We were told to finish what's on our plates despite feeling too full, and when we gain or lose weight, people comment on it.

A story much like this one was shared recently on Reddit. OP (original poster) opened the post by describing her mother as very thin and blonde, while OP is not.

She cited this as one of the reasons why their relationship is a challenging one at best. OP is also more like her father, which her mother takes as a personal affront.

OP has a family of her own and lives far away from her mother. OP candidly shared that her mother was unkind to her body while she was growing up.

It was the perfect environment for OP to develop body issues and eating disorders early on. Her mother used backhanded compliments to shame OP.

She also bought unflattering clothes that were either too small or too big for teenage OP and then blamed her when they didn't fit right. She used this as an excuse to make OP try the latest diet craze.

Now, as an adult, OP uses the Grey Rock Method to deal with her mother's invasive suggestions. This method involves communicating as boringly as possible when dealing with a manipulative person until they get bored and move on.

This worked when OP's mom tried her usual horrible tactics on OP after she moved out. OP told her mom that she could either stop being awful to her, or OP would leave, and voilà, it worked!

The thing is, OP's eldest daughter is going through puberty, and OP's mom is sensing another opportunity to dictate someone else's life.

OP is gritting her teeth as her mom realizes that OP's daughter is going through, according to OP's own words — the "chubby tween about to go through a growth spurt stage."

The eldest daughter is taller than OP, and she exercises daily. They eat healthy food, and OP is teaching her to listen to her hunger and fullness cues. Their doctor has also confirmed that the daughter is doing well.

However, knowing her own mother, OP is sure that her mom will say something unkind about the eldest daughter's appearance. Then she received a text.

OP's mom is asking for OP and her eldest daughter's measurements to buy them something. Based on their history, this is not a simple grandmotherly gesture.

OP knows that this question will lead to nowhere good. The Redditor admits that the clothing item to be gifted to them is useful, despite the mother's intentions.

The mom wanted to video call them about this, but OP said, "Maybe later." She and her eldest daughter did some online shopping and ordered the item themselves.

She then sent her mom a message thanking her for reminding them about the clothes and informing her that they had purchased them in the size and color they wanted.

As you probably guessed, this did not go well, and OP's mom replied that they "need to have a chat." To which OP's only thought is, "No, Mother, I don’t think we do."

Oniknight

You can read OP's entire original post below:

Oniknight Oniknight Oniknight Oniknight Oniknight Oniknight Oniknight Oniknight

OP handled it with so much grace. Really top-notch work!

Flashy_Current2284

OP's positive mother figure was her mother-in-law, who unfortunately passed away recently.

Oniknight

This kind of body and weight shaming is common for many women while growing up.

Fit_Ad_4455

The perfect measurement

katiegirl-

Concise yet super effective

vvictoriaclare

DD stands for dear daughter in this forum, and yes, OP was playing like Bobby Fischer.

TheDocJ

OP experienced it herself and knew how truly damaging it was; she understood there was no point in subjecting her daughter to the same ordeal.

Still_a_little_feral

If you've met any teenagers, you know how erratic their eating patterns are. You only need to think back on your own puberty to understand.

megaworld65

It's how our bodies are.

moderately_neato

Of course, we all need guidance.

dragonbud20

Yes to all of these.

moderately_neato

The mom shouldn't interact with any growing kids.

Here_for_tea_

It's time to show where she stands exactly.

secondhandbananas

Set some boundaries and enforce them.

goldiecarlisle

Continuation of the comment above.

goldiecarlisle

This is alarming!

fugensnot

Maybe it's time to have a chat with dear old mom.

chung_my_wang

There's a pattern that needs to be stopped.

chung_my_wang

Apparently, OP has tried this in the past without much success...

Oniknight

... given that she's still trying to pull the same trick with OP's own daughter...

Oniknight

... and dear old mom is on a well-deserved timeout.

Oniknight

We've all been through our awkward teenage phase. Our hormones were going insane, and in response, our bodies were quite literally changing overnight.

For those of you who experienced bullying and unkind comments (from your peers or your own family) about your physical appearance while growing up, I'm sorry you had to go through that.

To the teenagers who are experiencing these changes right now, it's okay. It's normal to gain weight or to look too thin because you suddenly grew 3 inches taller; it's all part of growing up. Be kinder to yourself.