Man Fixes Brother’s Wrecked Car Only To Be Told He Now Owes The Remaining Payments

Money is something that has been known to tear friendships and families apart. And when not handled properly, especially where agreements are not properly stipulated in a contract, it can turn explosive.

In this story, a couple tried to do something generous. The girlfriend owned a car worth roughly eight grand and decided to help her boyfriend’s (OP’s) younger brother by selling it to him for six thousand on a simple payment plan.

For a while, the brother paid as agreed. Then life happened, and he eventually totaled the car in a front-end collision.

The front was destroyed, the radiator was cracked, and it had numerous electrical problems. Things were definitely not looking good.

Rather than fixing it, he decided to buy a new car and left the damaged one sitting until it was going to get junked.

OP approached his brother and offered him a few hundred dollars as a courtesy to take the car, but the brother refused and preferred to let him have it and keep any future sale money.

After OP put time and money into getting the car running again, things took a different turn. The brother suddenly announced he would not finish the remaining two thousand dollars on the loan and expected OP to take over the payments.

OP rejected this new development, insisting the debt was not transferable to him. Worst of all, they never discussed such while negotiations for the car were ongoing back then.

Unfortunately for OP, the family sees things differently and has sided with their younger brother on this matter.

Screenshots below show how this conflict spiraled into a full-blown family feud. Grab a seat, because this one got heated very fast.

Let’s dig into the details

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OP’s brother purchased a car from his girlfriend on a payment plan and ended up totaling the car in a crash

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OP’s brother went on to buy a new car, while OP fixed and took over the wrecked car

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Understanding Financial Agreements

Financial experts emphasize the importance of clear agreements when dealing with family transactions. Dave Ramsey, a personal finance expert, suggests that any financial agreement should be documented thoroughly to avoid misunderstandings.

He notes that informal agreements can lead to discontent and resentment, especially when money is involved. To mitigate these risks, it’s advisable to have written contracts, even among family and friends, detailing the terms of payment, interest rates, and responsibilities.

The emotional fallout from financial disputes can be profound. Dr. Terri Orbuch, a relationship researcher, emphasizes that money often symbolizes deeper issues like trust and respect. When financial agreements go awry, it can lead to feelings of betrayal and anger.

She suggests that families engage in proactive communication, discussing not just the financial expectations but also the emotional implications of these agreements. This approach fosters empathy and understanding, which are vital for maintaining healthy familial relationships.

Now OP’s brother has shifted the remaining car debt to him, which has caused a fracas within the family, as OP has refused to accept such debt

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Important edit

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We gathered some interesting comments from the Reddit community

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Relationship experts highlight the emotional complexities that can arise from financial dealings within families. Dr. John Gottman, a renowned psychologist, explains that money can serve as a significant stressor in relationships, especially when expectations aren't aligned.

Open communication is crucial in these scenarios, allowing family members to express their feelings about finances without fear of judgment. Establishing regular check-ins can help ensure everyone is on the same page, reducing the likelihood of misunderstandings and fostering trust.

“Your brother is just trying to use your girlfriend’s money without having to pay it back.”

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“Nta. Your brother agreed on a purchase price and is responsible for the debt related to that.”

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“The payment plan was between the girlfriend and the brother. That’s their deal, and OP was never part of it.”

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Steps to Maintain Healthy Financial Relationships

Financial planners recommend setting clear boundaries and expectations from the start. This includes discussing how payments will be made and what happens in case of a default. Michael Kitces, a financial planner and commentator, advises families to use formal agreements that outline repayment timelines and interest agreements, even among loved ones.

This precaution can prevent potential conflicts and protect relationships. Additionally, utilizing budgeting tools can help track the payments and maintain transparency.

“If you don't need the car, give it to gf. She can then sell it and still sue brother for any remaining balance. NTA”

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This Redditor’s dad has a golden rule, “Never sell or buy a car to or from a family member or a friend.”

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The Reddit community is fully on OP’s side. They have made it clear that the agreement was between his brother and his girlfriend. In addition, there was no agreement for the transfer of debt.

One Redditor even suggested that OP pay off his girlfriend and sue his brother in a small claims court for the balance.

We do hope both siblings can find a way to resolve this amicably, and in a way that doesn’t destroy their relationship.

What’s your take on this matter? Tell us in the comments.

Expert Opinion

This situation highlights how financial agreements can become tangled in family dynamics, often leading to misunderstandings and resentment. The brother's decision to shift the debt may stem from a desire to avoid responsibility, which can be a common coping mechanism when faced with guilt or shame about a mistake. Additionally, the family's siding with him suggests a strong loyalty bias, where emotional ties can cloud judgment and lead to unfair expectations in these types of conflicts.

Navigating financial agreements among family members can be fraught with emotional and financial pitfalls. Experts like Dave Ramsey and Dr. John Gottman emphasize the importance of clear communication and formal agreements to avoid misunderstandings.

Incorporating structured discussions about expectations can enhance transparency, ensuring all parties feel valued and heard. Ultimately, fostering an environment of openness around finances can protect and strengthen family bonds, proving that good communication is just as valuable as financial savvy.