Choosing to Leave Toxic Hiking Group for Rival Team: AITA?
Struggling with loyalty to a toxic hiking group, a hiker contemplates joining a rival team aligned with their values, sparking conflicting judgments.
For 10 years, a 38-year-old guy treated his competitive hiking club like his second home, the place where he could be himself, train hard, and breathe. Then the vibe shifted, fast. Cliques formed, people started backstabbing, and the whole thing started to feel less like a team and more like a pressure cooker.
Now he’s made the move that’s setting off fireworks: he left and joined a rival hiking group that actually matches his values. The new crew is welcoming, positive, and even has a mentor named Rick who’s been helping him improve. But his old teammate Evan, who used to be his mentor, calls the switch “disloyal,” claiming he’s abandoning them in their time of need.
It’s not just about trails anymore, it’s about whether leaving toxic energy counts as betrayal.
Original Post
So I'm (38M), and for the past ten years, I've poured my heart and soul into this competitive hiking club. It's been my passion, my escape, my everything.
But over the last year, the team culture turned toxic. Cliques were forming, backstabbing, and just an overall suffocating environment.
It got to a point where my love for hiking was overshadowed by all the negativity. I made the tough decision to leave and join a rival hiking group.
The members there are welcoming, positive, and truly share my love for the great outdoors. They even have a mentor, Rick, who's been guiding me and helping me grow as a hiker.
However, my former teammates see my move as a betrayal. Evan, who was once my mentor in the old group, now calls me out for being disloyal.
He believes I'm abandoning them in their time of need and that I owe it to them to stick around. I'm torn between following my passion for hiking and staying loyal to the club that I've been a part of for a decade.
On one hand, I feel liberated and energized by the new group's positivity. On the other hand, I can't shake off the guilt of leaving my old team behind, especially with Evan's disappointment weighing on me.
For background, the rival group is more aligned with my values and vision for hiking, while my current team's toxicity was draining me mentally and emotionally. So AITA?
Group dynamics significantly affect individual well-being.
Comment from u/AdventureSeeker87

Comment from u/MountainExplorer22

Comment from u/WildernessDreamer
That’s when the cliques and backstabbing in the old club finally pushed him to pack up and start fresh.</p>
By actively seeking out groups that reflect one's values, individuals can cultivate a healthier sense of belonging. These supportive communities not only enhance personal growth but also contribute to a more positive collective experience in any shared activity.
Comment from u/OutdoorEnthusiast99
Comment from u/PeakClimber42
Comment from u/Trailblazer77
The moment he found the rival group’s mentor, Rick, who actually supports him, his “leave or stay” guilt got louder.</p>
Practical Steps for Transitioning Groups
Once clarity is achieved, individuals should attend a few meet-ups of the new group to gauge compatibility.
Comment from u/NatureLover2021
Comment from u/SummitConqueror55
Comment from u/HikeToTheStars
Then Evan stepped in, disappointed and calling him out for being disloyal, like he owes the toxic team loyalty forever.</p>
Research shows that the emotional impact of group experiences can be profound, influencing everything from self-esteem to stress levels. A study by the American Psychological Association highlights that group cohesion plays a vital role in enhancing personal satisfaction and well-being.
Moreover, when individuals leave toxic groups, they often rediscover their passion for activities like hiking. This not only revitalizes their spirit but also improves their overall mental health, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling outdoor experience.
Comment from u/OutdoorAdventurer365
Now he’s stuck between feeling liberated on the new trails and wondering if Evan is right about abandoning people who need him.</p>
What are your thoughts on this situation? Share your perspective in the comments below.
The article highlights how the once cherished hiking club became a source of negativity, underscoring the importance of supportive environments in any community, particularly in outdoor activities that should promote well-being and connection.
By recognizing the toxic dynamics that can develop over a decade, the user demonstrates a crucial step towards seeking out healthier alternatives. This transition not only enhances personal hiking experiences but also positively impacts the new community he joins. Finding a group that aligns with one’s values can reignite passion for the outdoors and foster a healthier mindset, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling life.
The hiking enthusiast's story underscores the complex struggle between loyalty and personal well-being that many encounter in toxic environments. After a decade of commitment to a group that turned sour, his decision to depart reveals a deep-seated need for belonging and authenticity. When these essential needs are compromised, it is understandable that one would seek out healthier spaces that encourage personal growth and joy.
By prioritizing mental health, he is not merely engaging in self-care; he is actively seeking a community that resonates with his values. This shift is crucial for lasting happiness and fulfillment, especially in a world where supportive connections can significantly enhance one’s outdoor experiences.
He might just be hiking for peace, but Evan wants him hiking in circles.
For another brutal family fallout, read about the Redditor whose parents left them millions, then disowned their sister.