Coworker Betrayal: Should I Refuse Collaboration After Being Undermined?

Some people don’t recognize a favor, they recognize leverage. In this workplace story, OP thought Alex was a dependable partner on a critical project, until one meeting turned that partnership into a public betrayal.

OP and Alex were supposed to team up on a high-stakes project with complementary strengths, but during a progress update, Alex took credit for the wins and dumped the blame on OP for anything that went sideways. Worse, OP says he has covered for Alex’s mistakes before, so this wasn’t just a disagreement, it was a “you screwed me in front of everyone” moment.

Now Alex wants to keep collaborating, and OP is stuck deciding whether to stay professional or protect themselves from another round of getting used.

Original Post

So I'm (28M) working on a critical project in my company, and my colleague, let's call him Alex (30M), is supposed to be my partner in this endeavor. However, during a recent high-stakes team meeting, Alex completely threw me under the bus.

For background, our project has been challenging, and we both have different strengths that should complement each other. But when our boss asked about progress, Alex took all the credit for the successful parts while shifting the blame onto me for anything that went wrong.

It was a shock to me and our team. I was taken aback by this betrayal, especially since I've always covered for Alex's mistakes and supported his ideas.

I feel hurt and blindsided by his actions. Now, Alex wants to continue working together on the project, but I'm hesitant and filled with doubt about his intentions and reliability.

I'm torn between maintaining a professional front and refusing to collaborate with someone who undermined me. So, Reddit, WIBTA if I decide not to work with Alex moving forward?

I honestly don't know if I'm overreacting here, but I can't shake off the feeling of being used and thrown aside. Really need outside perspective on this.

The Trust Factor

This scenario highlights a classic workplace betrayal that’s all too relatable. The OP's experience with Alex underscores a severe breach of trust that can fracture not just their working relationship but the entire team’s morale. In high-stakes projects, it’s crucial for colleagues to have each other’s backs, especially when the pressure is on. Alex’s maneuvering to take credit while pinning blame on the OP is a textbook example of undermining, and it raises an important question: how do you move forward when a colleague acts more like a competitor?

There’s also the unspoken tension here. By deciding whether or not to collaborate with Alex again, the OP is weighing their professional obligations against personal integrity. It’s a fine line to walk, and it’s no wonder this story has sparked so much debate among readers who’ve faced similar dilemmas.

That progress-meeting stunt is what makes OP question whether Alex is a teammate or just a credit collector.

Comment from u/PotatoGuru99

Oof, that's a tough spot to be in. Can't blame you for feeling betrayed by Alex's actions. NTA if you need some space to process this before deciding to work with him again.

Comment from u/CoffeeAndChill

NTA - Alex showed his true colors by throwing you under the bus.

Comment from u/starrynight_112

WIBTA if you don't express your concerns to Alex first? Could be an opportunity for clarity and to see if there's a chance to rebuild trust. Communication is key in any working relationship.

Comment from u/SleepyPanda27

Alex sounds like bad news.

The fact that OP has covered for Alex before makes the blame-pinning feel personal, not just political.

Comment from u/OceanEyes33

Alex's behavior is unacceptable. Trust is key in any professional setting. If you feel like working with him would jeopardize the project or your well-being, then it's understandable to want to distance yourself. NTA.

This feels a lot like the tech worker’s AITA question about refusing collaboration after a teammate took credit.

Comment from u/MoonlightDreamer

NTA.

Comment from u/SandAndSunset

Really sorry you're dealing with this kind of betrayal at work. It's rough when someone you trusted turns on you. NTA for wanting to protect yourself and your project by reconsidering the collaboration with Alex.

When the boss asks about progress again, OP is probably picturing Alex doing the same song and dance, just with fresher receipts.

Comment from u/MountainHiker88

NTA. Alex created a toxic dynamic by undermining you. Your decision to distance yourself from him is understandable, given the circumstances. Trust your instincts and prioritize your professional well-being.

Comment from u/CoffeeBeanLover123

NTA.

Comment from u/JazzHands_77

Sounds like Alex crossed a line by taking credit for your work and shifting blame onto you. NTA for wanting to reconsider your collaboration. Protect yourself and your project from further undermining. You're looking out for your best interests.

And Alex pushing to keep working together right after throwing OP under the bus is what really turns this from “work drama” into “trust issue.”

We're curious to hear your perspective. Share your thoughts in the comments.

The Community Reaction

What’s fascinating about the community’s response to this story is the division it’s created.

The Bigger Picture

This story serves as a powerful reminder of how fragile trust can be in professional settings.

In this situation, the OP's feelings of betrayal stem from Alex's blatant undermining during a crucial project meeting.

OP is not wrong for wondering if Alex only collaborates when he’s the one getting praised.

Still debating whether to refuse Alex after he took credit in meetings? Read the Reddit take on a difficult colleague on a career-boosting project.