Dad Wants To Know If He Was Wrong For Not Buying His 3-Year-Old Daughter A Phone

A father’s refusal to hand his 3-year-old daughter a phone has sparked a familiar parenting debate, and this one comes with a messy family dynamic attached.

He and his fiancée are already juggling toddler tantrums, borrowed phones, and a compromise that leans toward a learning tablet instead of a smartphone. But once the child started pushing for more screen time, the disagreement turned into a bigger question about boundaries, parenting styles, and who gets the final say.

Now the internet has weighed in, and the answer is not as simple as it first sounds.

Although the account has been deleted, this dad sent a query (if he was wrong for not allowing his daughter to have a phone) to the "Am I The Assh*le" community.

My fiancée (28F) and I (29M) have a daughter who just turned 3.

That age is doing a lot of work in this argument.

So yesterday, my fiancée told me that she hates having to keep giving up her phone to our daughter and that we should give her a phone, to which I replied, “Absolutely not! She’s just turning three. However, we could get her those learning tablets since she will be starting preschool soon.”

As a compromise, the child is given a learning tablet instead of a phone.

My fiancée told me, “Loosen up! You’re acting like one of those helicopter parents, and most toddlers have phones. She always throws fits when I don’t give her my phone, so what if we just give her my old phone, maybe?”

Now the child has been throwing tantrums, and the fiancée is left to deal with it solely.

I told her, “Maybe when she’s 12 or 13, but for now, let’s just get her that educational tablet.” And we just left it at that.She’s been giving me the silent treatment, and now it’s making me wonder, AITA?

Check out the edit: this clarifies everything.

Edit: I’ve always given up my phone to her, but when she has fits, I would say no. Because she told our daughter that I’m the boring parent who ALWAYS says “No,” and she’s the fun parent who always says “Yes,” our daughter would go to my fiancée whenever she wants things such as sweets before bed and, of course, her phone.

This also echoes the AITA fight where one partner objected to adopting a puppy without discussing it first.

Phones should not replace social interactions.

tepp0619

Gadgets harm children's brain development.

Gadgets have been shown to severely affect kids negatively, from harming their brain development and learning skills to influencing obesity, etc.There is a certain age mark where it is safe to offer kids specifically designed learning games on tablets, but allowing them to watch videos and play games without guidance at 3 years old is just outrageous.All parents need to educate themselves on the effects of gadget use.

ImFinePleaseThanks

Toddlers should not have smartphones.

radfordra1

Books, not a phone.

Thejmax / Zealousideal-Set-592

Don't give that young, moldable brain something to get hooked on.

NTA. WTAF. My three-year-old asks to see pictures on my phone but doesn’t need her own! She has an educational tablet that she LOVES, and we limit her time on it. Do not give that young, moldable brain something to get hooked on.

gillygillyj

In conclusion, most have taken sides with this dad.

Tantrums do expire in a way, and they are not forever. What is important is that you save your kids from the destruction that owning a single phone can bring about.

Do you feel the same way too? I hope you do.

Now he’s wondering if he really is the problem.

Want another parenting standoff? See what happened when a dad blocked his daughter’s dog adoption after cat neglect.