Guy Dating Girl With BPD Is Tired Of His Girlfriend's Mental Issues, Especially After She Quit Therapy; Considers Breaking Up With Her

But he gets held back when he remembers the good times they spent together.

Some relationships run on love, patience, and the occasional bad mood. This one sounds like it has been running on mood swings, arguments, and the slow burn of watching your partner spiral, then pull away from the one thing that helped.

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A guy says he’s been dating his girlfriend for a year, and when she’s calm, she’s genuinely amazing. But the moment her moods flip, it hits him hard, and lately it’s gotten so bad it’s started messing with his own mental health.

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Then she quit therapy, and now he’s stuck asking himself if he can keep doing this.

The original poster (OP) has been dating his girlfriend for a year, but he's getting tired of her issues after she quit therapy.

The original poster (OP) has been dating his girlfriend for a year, but he's getting tired of her issues after she quit therapy.Reddit
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The OP feels that his girlfriend is amazing when she doesn't have her mood swings.

However, the issues have been piling up to the point that they are now taking a toll on his mental health. Now, he is considering breaking up with his girlfriend.

The OP feels that his girlfriend is amazing when she doesn't have her mood swings.Reddit
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Redditors believe it's time for the OP to break up with his girlfriend, especially since she stopped therapy.

Redditors believe it's time for the OP to break up with his girlfriend, especially since she stopped therapy.Reddit

That “amazing when she’s fine” version of his girlfriend is what makes all of this so exhausting for OP.

The article highlights the complexities of dating someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), particularly through the lens of a man grappling with the emotional turmoil caused by his girlfriend's mental health struggles. BPD is characterized by intense emotional experiences and challenges in interpersonal dynamics, which can lead to significant strain on relationships. The situation described illustrates how fear of abandonment and emotional instability can manifest within a partnership, pushing individuals to their emotional limits.

As the boyfriend considers breaking up with his girlfriend after she quit therapy, it underscores the importance of emotional regulation in maintaining healthy relationships. The decision to step away from therapy can hinder progress and exacerbate the challenges associated with BPD, making it crucial for partners to navigate these complexities with understanding and patience.

A Redditor attests that dating someone with BPD is hard. Some people with this disorder tend to gaslight their partners.

A Redditor attests that dating someone with BPD is hard. Some people with this disorder tend to gaslight their partners.Reddit

Several Redditors have recounted their experiences with partners who have this mental condition, and those relationships were not pleasant.

Several Redditors have recounted their experiences with partners who have this mental condition, and those relationships were not pleasant.Reddit

People who have untreated BPD cannot manage a relationship. No matter how much the OP loves his girlfriend, he has to end it if she doesn't believe in therapy.

People who have untreated BPD cannot manage a relationship. No matter how much the OP loves his girlfriend, he has to end it if she doesn't believe in therapy.Reddit

After she stopped going to therapy, the mood swings did not just fade, they piled up until OP felt it in his head too.

This echoes the rescue-dog dilemma of someone debating rehoming their dog to protect their partner’s safety, even if it hurts emotionally.

This can create significant emotional turbulence and make it challenging for partners to maintain stability in the relationship.

Recognizing these patterns is vital for fostering empathy and understanding within the relationship.

He's too young to be handling this drama. He needs to move on.

He's too young to be handling this drama. He needs to move on.Reddit

A person with the mental disorder discusses how to make things work when dating a partner with BPD.

It takes a lot of effort and constant communication.

A person with the mental disorder discusses how to make things work when dating a partner with BPD.Reddit

If the girlfriend sees the OP as her therapist, then this relationship isn't going to be healthy.

If the girlfriend sees the OP as her therapist, then this relationship isn't going to be healthy.Reddit

Redditors jumped in with the same warning, untreated BPD can turn the relationship into a constant emotional roller coaster.

Supportive relationships and therapy play crucial roles in managing BPD symptoms.

Encouraging partners to pursue therapeutic support can enhance their coping strategies and strengthen the relationship.

A female Redditor reveals the bad side of sticking with a partner with untreated BPD.

A female Redditor reveals the bad side of sticking with a partner with untreated BPD.Reddit

When OP realizes she doesn’t want to stick with therapy anymore, he starts weighing whether breaking up is the only way to protect himself.

For the OP, it may be hard to let go of his girlfriend because of how wonderful she is during times when she's stable. However, in the long run, as one user has pointed out, she will drain him emotionally.

Staying in this relationship isn't doing his mental health any favors either. It's time to encourage the girlfriend to return to therapy and for him to move on from her.

Practical strategies might include attending couple’s therapy sessions to address relational dynamics.

The journey of understanding borderline personality disorder within a relationship demands immense patience and empathy.

Now he’s wondering if staying means sacrificing his peace, and leaving might be the only sane choice.

For another hard relationship call, see what happened when someone considered returning their adopted dog over pet care differences in this WIBTA thread.

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