Dealing with Discomfort: A Teen Asks for Advice on Navigating Issues with Girlfriend’s Overly Clingy Dog

Some couples have cute meet-cute stories, and some couples have to negotiate bathroom access with a clingy dog who acts like it pays rent. This one started simple, then quickly turned into a daily “how do I survive being in the same house as this animal” problem for a 16-year-old girlfriend.

OP says she’s not used to pets, since she grew up with fish, so the adjustment is already rough. But her girlfriend’s dog is not just affectionate, it’s described as constantly stinking, licking everything in sight, and whining nonstop, especially when OP and her girlfriend are just trying to exist in the same space after school and on weekends.

And the worst part? The dog’s behavior is so constant that OP feels trapped in her own boundaries, even when she’s just trying to sit down or use the bathroom.

Original Post

I (16F) have been having trouble with my girlfriend (16F)'s dog. Here’s what you should know before I start: I’ve never had a pet like a dog or cat; I grew up with fish, lol, so I’m not really used to animals like that.

Lately, I’ve been struggling to enjoy my time with my girlfriend because of her dog. I spend a good amount of time with her, going to each other's houses after school since we ride together, and we also spend weekends at each other's places.

This means I’m often around her dog. Honestly, her dog is very… annoying.

She’s overly clingy, stinks, and has no boundaries. I know that dogs are loving and clingy animals and they have a scent, but her dog is that and MORE.

First, about her smell: due to her age (17 in human years) and breed, she has rotting teeth, and the surgery to fix that costs thousands of dollars, so that’s not happening. Another issue is that the dog has medical problems with her anal area, which means she’s always licking and messing with her butt.

This makes her breath smell ten times worse, and it’s a big reason I don’t like being around her. Second, her clinginess: this dog is just way too clingy.

I’ve never liked it when anyone or anything is overly clingy with me (unless it’s my significant other, like my girlfriend). I really value my personal space, and that’s a boundary I’ve had for a long time.

The dog has no sense of independence. If you’re going to the bathroom, she’s right there with you.

If you’re in the kitchen, she’s right at your feet. Want to lay down?

She’s right behind you! And don’t think you can just shut the door!

She WHINES and WHINES. I don’t mean the little puppy dog eyes and the “hmm, hmm.” I mean a loud, screeching whine that you can’t drown out, and she just gets louder and won’t stop.

So what does my girlfriend do? She lets her in, so now the dog is literally whining to be right up our butt.

Don’t forget her smell… and the licking of feet and butt. I almost forgot about the begging for food.

She’ll sit and stare at you while you’re eating, all up in your face, with her breath. There have been times when I’m lying on the couch or chair with my girlfriend in her room, and her dog won’t leave us alone.

I even suggested bringing the dog’s bed into her room so she could be with us but not so close, so we could have our own time. But the dog literally whined and whined until she found a way to jump up and lay directly on me.

I was so frustrated that I tried to move, but my girlfriend held me down and said she wanted me to stay. They let her do whatever she wants; she’s allowed on every couch, every bed, pillows, and even in the bathroom.

There’s nowhere you can be that this dog isn’t allowed. I’ve been around family members with pets, and a lot of this behavior isn’t allowed—maybe one specific couch, but no beds, etc.

Why does she need to be with me while I’m in the bathroom? Sometimes we can’t hang out because the dog has to stay with her.

So what do I do to accommodate? I go over there, but I feel irritated, even though at least I’m with my girlfriend.

I understand this has been her home for years, and I’m the new one stepping in, but I feel like it’s causing a separation between me and my girlfriend because I’m uncomfortable, irritated, and annoyed. I’m always accommodating this dog for her, but I feel like there are no accommodations for me.

AITAH? What should I do?

Attachment theory offers a valuable lens through which to examine the dynamics at play in this teenage relationship.

Comment from u/barsoap___

Comment from u/Confident-Bet-808

When OP says the dog is right there during every bathroom trip and kitchen moment, it’s clear personal space is basically gone the second the door opens.

Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology indicates that attachment styles significantly influence relationship dynamics.

Comment from u/Individual-Spot2700

Comment from u/Relevant_Mirror_4206

Then there’s the smell situation, with OP linking it to rotting teeth and the dog’s medical issues, which makes every cuddle feel like a full sensory attack.

Pets often become integral parts of our lives, and conflicts over their behavior can lead to stress in relationships. Psychologists recommend engaging in open discussions about expectations and boundaries regarding pet behavior.

Utilizing techniques such as active listening can help both partners express their feelings and work towards a collaborative approach to managing challenges with pets.

It’s a lot like the inheritance situation, where family used the teen’s money for luxury.

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Comment from u/Cocklecove

The whining is what really seals it, because OP isn’t dealing with quiet puppy eyes, she’s dealing with a screeching, won’t-stop noise that her girlfriend keeps enabling by letting the dog in.

Seeking couples therapy can also provide valuable support during these discussions.

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We're curious to hear your perspective. Share your thoughts in the comments.

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Comment from u/ocean_lei

In the delicate balance of relationships, the clash between differing attachment styles and pet ownership can lead to significant tension. The young poster's struggle with her girlfriend's clingy dog highlights the need for awareness of these dynamics. The discomfort she feels as a self-identified fish person in a dog-centric environment underscores the importance of communication and empathy in addressing such conflicts.

As the OP navigates this canine conundrum, it becomes evident that fostering understanding between partners can pave the way for healthier interactions. By openly discussing their feelings about the dog, both she and her girlfriend can work towards a resolution that respects their emotional needs while strengthening their bond.

Nobody wants to feel like they’re dating a dog’s personal assistant.

Want another relationship-level blowup? See what happened when a roommate gambled away rent money.