Redditor Asks What To Do About Ex Who Left Her Dog for a Year and Now Demands Him Back
He cared for the dachshund through vet bills and job loss - now she claims he “stole” him.
Breakups can be complicated, and when pets are involved, the situation often becomes even more difficult. Animals are not just property; they are companions who depend on stability and care. When former partners disagree about who should keep a pet, emotions run high, and questions of responsibility and attachment can lead to serious conflict.
In this case, the OP described how his breakup with his ex-girlfriend happened more than a year ago. During the separation, she asked him to temporarily look after her senior dachshund, Frank, while she searched for a new pet-friendly place.
OP agreed because he cared about the dog. What was supposed to be a short arrangement stretched into months.
Although his ex occasionally asked how Frank was doing, she never visited, contributed money for food or medical bills, or made plans to take him back. Over time, her contact stopped altogether.
During this period, OP became the sole caretaker. He covered regular expenses, handled a costly vet bill, and even during financial struggles, ensured Frank’s needs were met. After ten months with no effort from his ex, OP began to view Frank as his own dog.
Fourteen months later, his ex suddenly reappeared. With a new job, apartment, and partner, she announced she was ready to take Frank back. OP refused, explaining that she had abandoned the dog and he had taken full responsibility for over a year.
She accused him of stealing her pet, and the dispute escalated with her and her new boyfriend sending hostile messages. Friends are divided on whether OP is justified in keeping Frank or if he should return him. What is clear is that when people treat pets as temporary obligations, it is the animals who risk suffering the most.
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RedditProviding care for an animal for over three months makes you its legal owner.
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If OP cares about the dog, he absolutely shouldn't give it back.
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She abandoned him.
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She doesn't deserve Frank.
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Frank is OP's dog now.
RedditOP's ex neglected the dog.
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She's a horrible
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A judge would say he is legally OP's dog now.
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OP is completely right - she did abandon the dog.
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OP should contact the police before the situation escalates.
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Leaving a dog with someone for an entire year - is abandonment, plain and simple.
Expert Opinion
This situation highlights the complex emotional dynamics that can come into play in relationships involving pets. The ex's sudden demand for the dog after a year of absence suggests a lack of understanding about the emotional and psychological bond that forms between a caregiver and an animal. It’s common for people to underestimate the impact of abandonment on both pets and their caregivers, often leading to conflict when the responsibilities of care are not equally shared or respected.
In situations like this, responsibility matters more than past ownership. OP was left to cover every cost, provide daily care, and take full responsibility for the dog over the course of 14 months.
During that time, his ex made no real effort to reclaim or support her pet. By abandoning her role as the owner, she effectively gave up her claim. OP stepped in and became the only consistent caretaker, ensuring the dachshund’s well-being.
Given the circumstances, it is reasonable to consider the dog his now. Frank’s stability and continued care should take priority, and OP has already proven he can provide both.
