Teenager's Family Badmouths Her Brazilian-Japanese Girlfriend In Another Language Not Knowing She Was Fluent In It

Some family dinners get awkward fast, especially when one guest understands every word being said about her. That is exactly what happened to an 18-year-old Brazilian-Japanese woman who asked Reddit for a reality check after her girlfriend's family kept criticizing her in Japanese.

OP has Japanese roots through her maternal side, and she grew up hearing the language at home, so she is fluent. Her girlfriend, Lara, also has Japanese heritage, and OP regularly visits Lara's parents for lunch, where the adults often switch to Japanese without thinking twice.

The problem is that Lara's parents were not just chatting, they were badmouthing OP right in front of her. Now the question is whether OP was wrong for never telling them she could understand every insult.

Now it was time for OP's parents and Lara's parents to meet

OP's mom got a phone call from her mother in the middle of dinner. When she got back to the table, she told OP in Japanese that her grandmother sends her regards, to which OP replied, also in Japanese, that she would contact them later.

Lara's parents were surprised by the exchange but didn't make any comments. OP got a message from Lara requesting a video call after OP dropped off her parents at their hotel.

Lara told OP that she embarrassed her parents when she didn't disclose that she spoke Japanese. She said her parents spoke of family matters in Japanese, thinking OP couldn't understand them.

OP said something along the lines of, "Oh, like when they badmouthed me?" She told Lara it was her fault for assuming OP couldn't speak the language, despite knowing her family is of Japanese descent.

Lara doubled down and said OP could have mentioned it and avoided the awkwardness during their dinner. OP said she didn't speak Japanese on purpose, as she was simply responding to her mother's update.

Ta2777271

Is OP an a**hole for not informing her girlfriend she was fluent in Japanese? Read the full story below:

Ta2777271 Ta2777271 Ta2777271 Ta2777271 Ta2777271 Ta2777271 Ta2777271 That first dinner already had enough tension for one family.

This is similar to the vegetarian-table dinner fight when her friend ordered meat and made her dad pay.

Oh, by the way, that dinner was the first time Lara met OP's parents.

Ta2777271

How come Lara is defending her parents in this situation? Maybe she agreed with their criticisms of OP?

alalal982

They didn't even wait for her to get out of the room and went straight into dissecting her attire and eating habits.

Daphne-is-satan

Is speaking about a person in another language a common thing for bilingual folks?

-Butterfly-Queen-

For this redditor and her family, it is. Even when you don't say anything bad about another person, it just causes unnecessary anxiety, not to mention how rude it is.

DiscoAgent13

If there's a common language, then it's just good manners to speak in that language or at least translate for the new person.

MarionberryIll228 This commenter keeps it simple.

I'm sorry I didn't tell you I can understand you while you were talking smack about me!

Heavn4Me

They could have saved their opinion until OP was out of the house.

jsodano

It's wrong on so many levels to invite a person into your home and speak badly of them while they're sitting there eating your food, regardless of whether they understand you or not.

VeriumOntaris

They assumed it, and that's their fault.

heretic8921

Lara is ashamed of her family's rudeness, and instead of apologizing, she is now blaming OP for it. Well done.

Maleficent_Mistake50 The family dinner did not end well.

Unfortunately for OP, her story isn't this cute.

Wearealreadyhere

There is no angle in this where Lara's family is absolved of their rudeness, and OP is wrong for not telling them she could speak Japanese. It's simply wrong to badmouth someone while they're sitting in front of you as a guest.

Lara is at fault here for backing her parents up and blaming OP for not telling them she could understand every insult and criticism they uttered. Best of luck to this couple; they should talk about this in every language they know just to make sure they aren't missing any more details.

Want more family fire, read about the cousin who disrespected OP’s mom at a reunion.