"Women Should Not Work At All And They Belong At Home," AITA For Refusing To Quit My Job?

Many women face challenges balancing their careers and family life. They often have to navigate their emotions and expectations from their loved ones.

In some cases, their careers are a source of pride and fulfillment, but they can also be a source of stress and guilt. Women in male-dominated fields often face unique challenges and biases.

Despite these challenges, many women thrive in their careers and make valuable contributions to their families and communities. OP is a 27-year-old Petroleum Service Technician who loves her job.

She works hard and makes good money, often going above and beyond her regular hours. Her husband also works, and they have a 6-year-old daughter together.

Everything was going smoothly until OP's husband expressed his opinion about her work-life balance. He's mentioned that he thinks she should quit her job or work part-time but OP values her career and isn't sure what to do.

She's wondering if she's being selfish by prioritizing her job. You see, OP's daughter doesn’t seem to have a problem when she has to go or when she works late.

So now the problem lies with her husband. What's worse is that OP's husband seems to have traditional views about women's roles in the family.

OP revealed what these views were and you can read all about it as you scroll down.

The OP writes...

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The OP works Mondays to Fridays and sometimes late nights or on-calls on technical problems

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OP's husband believes women should not work at all and they belong at home

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Cultural Expectations in the Workplace

Dr. Michele Gelfand, a cultural psychologist, highlights how societal norms shape perceptions of women's roles in the workforce. Her research indicates that in cultures with strict gender norms, women often face heightened pressure to conform to traditional family roles.

This can lead to significant stress for working mothers who balance career aspirations with familial responsibilities. Gelfand argues that creating supportive workplace environments that value flexibility and inclusivity can help alleviate these pressures, allowing women to thrive both professionally and personally.

Empowering Women in the Workforce

Dr. Pat Love, a respected relationship therapist, notes that empowering women in the workforce requires societal change. She emphasizes that organizations should actively promote gender equality through mentorship programs and leadership training.

Love suggests that creating networks for women to share experiences and challenges can foster a sense of community and support. By investing in women's professional development, companies not only enhance their workforce but also contribute to a more equitable society.

The OP says that she feels most respected by her boss and co-workers

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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the AH:

1, normally women are not in the trades and it can be controversial having a female in a male-dominated industry. 2, some people believe women should spend more time with their kid(s) rather than being at work

We've gathered some of the most upvoted comments from other Redditors for you to read through below

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This Redditor is advicing that you should not allow your partner take away your ability to make money

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According to Dr. Sue Johnson, a couples therapy pioneer, communication is key in balancing work and home life. She suggests that couples should engage in regular discussions about their needs and expectations to prevent misunderstandings.

Johnson emphasizes that setting aside time for these conversations can lead to better support systems and reduce feelings of resentment. By establishing clear boundaries regarding work hours and family time, couples can collaboratively navigate their responsibilities more effectively.

From someone whose husband and son are proud of her career

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This Redditor wants to know if the OP works with more men than women

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He clearly wants to control the OP and she shouldn't let that happen

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The Psychological Burden

Dr. Barbara Fredrickson, a leading researcher in positive psychology, explains how the stress of balancing work and family can influence mental health. Her studies suggest that chronic stress diminishes emotional well-being, leading to feelings of inadequacy.

To combat this, she recommends adopting a practice of self-compassion. By acknowledging one's struggles without judgment, individuals can cultivate resilience. Fredrickson's research indicates that small acts of kindness toward oneself can enhance overall life satisfaction and improve relationships.

OP's husband does not respect her

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The OP should keep on working

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What OP's husband seems to be admitting

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In navigating workplace challenges, Dr. David Allen, a productivity expert, advocates for the 'Getting Things Done' methodology. He emphasizes the importance of organizing tasks and priorities effectively to manage both work and home life.

By breaking tasks into actionable steps and ensuring regular reviews, individuals can reduce overwhelm and increase productivity. Allen suggests that setting specific goals for both professional and personal domains can help maintain a balanced life, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling experience.

OP's situation raises questions about the balance between career and family. Will she choose to prioritize her job or her husband's wishes?

OP's love for her career and her desire to contribute to her family's well-being are both valid. Her husband's traditional views may stem from his own upbringing or societal expectations, but as OP navigates this challenge, she'll have to consider what matters most to her.

For this story, OP was declared not the AH, and that is where we draw the curtains.

Expert Opinion

This situation really highlights the clash between traditional gender roles and modern values. OP's husband might be expressing insecurity or a need for control, which can often stem from societal pressures or deep-seated beliefs about masculinity and femininity. Meanwhile, OP's commitment to her career reflects a desire for autonomy and fulfillment, showing how complex the balance between family expectations and personal aspirations can be.

Understanding the Deeper Patterns

The challenges women face in balancing work and family life are complex and deeply rooted in societal norms. Experts like Dr. Michele Gelfand and Dr. Sue Johnson stress the importance of communication and understanding within relationships to navigate these pressures effectively.

Moreover, adopting strategies recommended by productivity experts like Dr. David Allen can help manage overwhelming responsibilities. By fostering supportive workplaces and empowering women through mentorship, we can create environments where all individuals can thrive both professionally and personally.