Mom Reaches Out To Adult Daughter For Christmas Dinner, Only To Get A Big Fat “No” After Lifetime Of Neglect
She built a life on her own after being forgotten, and the Christmas dinner Invite didn’t land the way her family hoped
College life comes with independence, freedom, and sometimes complicated family dynamics, and for one young woman, that was exactly what shaped her holiday season this year.
At 21, she’s living on her own in a dorm, paying her own bills, and carving out a life that’s entirely separate from the family she grew up with. Her mom, who had her at 19, moved across the country after splitting with her dad, leaving the household dynamic complicated from the start.
Over the years, her mom remarried, had another child, and she admits she grew resentful, especially when she felt invisible amid her mom’s new family.
When she got into university, she moved out with a scholarship and started her own life. Communication with her mom has been minimal, usually just a text on her birthday or New Year’s. Only this year did she get a message announcing a new baby sister.
Recently, she received an email invitation to a large Christmas dinner hosted by her mom’s new family. For someone with whom she has little relationship, it was easy to decline.
Her decision triggered an emotional response from her mom, who called, crying and hoping to see her. Her stepdad got involved and scolded her, making her feel guilty about choosing herself over the family event.
Here are the screenshots so you can digest the full story.
Let’s dig into the details
Reddit.comA bit of backstory
Reddit.comOP grew apart from her mother after she remarried and had a baby
Reddit.com
OP got invited to a family Christmas dinner by her mom, but declined. This made her mom feel terrible, and even stirred up friction with her stepdad
Reddit.com
We gathered some interesting comments from the Reddit community
Reddit.com
“Just because they want play “happy family” for the other family members doesn’t mean you need to play too.”
Reddit.com
“If your mom doesn’t feel the need to stay in contact other than holidays, you aren’t obligated to run home just because she asks you to.”
Reddit.com
“I think she's just looking to play happy family while the distant relatives are around.”
Reddit.com
“If your mom wants you to attend holiday gatherings, she needs to put in the effort to build an actual relationship.”
Reddit.com
“NTA, you aren't obligated to go to a dinner invite now after so many years of neglect.”
Reddit.com
“The choice to go, or not, is entirely yours. NTA what ever you decide.”
Reddit.com
“NTA- don’t let anyone guilt trip you into being in a place you know is toxic for you.”
Reddit.com
OP isn’t rejecting her mom entirely but is protecting herself from past tension and unresolved feelings.
At the same time, her mom’s reaction shows how important family connections are to those left behind.
However, the majority of Netizens have backed OP to stand her ground without feeling guilty.
Regardless of what OP’s decision is, we do hope she and her mom can talk things out and mend anything broken in their relationship.
What do you think about this story? Share your thoughts in the comments.
