Family Furious At Grandchild For Refusing To Attend Family Gatherings Due To Their Persistent Chain-Smoking Habit
When family gatherings harm more than they heal.
Family gatherings are supposed to feel warm and festive, but for some, they’ve become unbearable.
One Reddit user shared that they’ve recently stopped attending Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners at their grandparents’ house, and the reason is simple: secondhand smoke.
Their family has always been made up of chain smokers, and the house itself is tiny. Every time they visit, the smoke fills the air, leaving them coughing, their sinuses irritated, and feeling physically awful within minutes.
Despite repeatedly asking their relatives to smoke outside, the habit has continued indoors, without a care in the world.
Over the years, they’ve watched family members ignore their health concerns, leaving them with the impossible choice between showing up to family dinners or protecting their well-being.
This year, they simply decided not to go, and the backlash has been intense. Their parents and other relatives have called them disrespectful, insisting that family obligations should outweigh personal comfort and health.
The situation raises questions about respect and boundaries. When does loyalty to family stop being about togetherness and start being about sacrificing your own health?
At what point is it okay to step back from gatherings that cause real physical harm?
This story has sparked a lot of debate online, with commenters weighing in with their personal opinions.
Scroll through the screenshots below to read the full story yourself and see exactly how this conflict unfolded.
Let’s dig into the details
Reddit.comOP decided to stop going to family dinners due to the persistent smoking of family members
Reddit.comThe constant smoking affects OP’s health negatively, and they’re putting their foot down on this decision despite pressure to attend
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We gathered some interesting comments from the Reddit community
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“NTA Stand up for your health.”
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“I’m a smoker and even I couldn’t stand to be in that environment, that sh*t is nasty.”
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“Maybe you should go and put a little card table out on the deck with your non smoking cousin and have a party out there.”
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“My brother died to lung cancer due to second hand smoking (uncle) since he worked for the f**ker.”
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“NTA your lungs aren't used to the smoke so you're going be hurting big time every time.”
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“When your parents call you disrespectful just tell them you'll be back as soon as they stop smoking in the house.”
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“Don't worry about them, they clearly aren't worrying about you.”
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“You are just doing what’s best for your health in the long run.”
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It’s clear that personal boundaries and health concerns are at the heart of this story. While family traditions often carry weight, it’s also important to acknowledge when those traditions cause harm or discomfort.
Deciding not to attend doesn’t automatically make someone disrespectful; it’s a choice rooted in self-care. Families may struggle to understand, but open conversation about limits can prevent resentment and repeated conflict.
What do you think? Was OP right to stay away from their family gatherings to protect their health, or could they have handled this in a better way?
Share your thoughts in the comments.
