University Student Feels Bad Kicking Out A Homeless Person From Shared Kitchen In The Middle Of The Night

While it's admirable to help people, there are times when our own safety must take precedence. This story from the "Am I The A**hole?" (AITA) subreddit serves as a good example.

The original poster (OP) is a university student residing in private student accommodation. During the early hours, OP went into the shared kitchen, which is used by seven other students, and noticed a person he hadn’t seen before sitting in the corner.

The individual, appearing to be in their late 30s or early 40s, was dressed in worn-down clothes, raising OP’s suspicion that they might be homeless. The stranger then asked OP, “Do you know when the light will turn off?” confirming that they didn’t belong there.

Feeling uneasy, he texted his flatmates. Those who were still awake were also alarmed and decided to report the intruder to security.

Security soon arrived and escorted the person out, revealing that they were indeed a homeless individual who had sneaked in after a student opened the door when security wasn’t looking. The OP later shared the incident with other friends, and while most agreed with his decision, one friend surprisingly criticized OP for kicking the homeless person out.

This left OP wondering if he was in the wrong, though the general consensus among his flatmates was that reporting the intruder was the right call for everyone's safety.

After security kicked out a homeless person he discovered, the OP felt guilty.

Reddit

The OP went to the kitchen and saw a stranger who looked homeless.

Reddit

The Emotional Toll of Conflict

Conflict situations, like the one described, often evoke strong emotional responses. As noted by Dr. Dan Ariely, behavioral economist, "When we face moral dilemmas, our emotions can lead us to feel guilt and anxiety, especially when our decisions impact vulnerable populations." These feelings arise from a fundamental human desire to feel good about our choices and to be perceived as compassionate by others. Understanding this can help individuals navigate their feelings of guilt more constructively, allowing for reflection rather than self-condemnation, as emphasized by Dr. Shawn Achor, positive psychology researcher, who states, "Embracing our emotional responses can lead to personal growth and better decision-making."

The stranger asked him a question, which confirmed his suspicion.

Reddit

After the OP texted his flatmates to let them know about the situation, they reported the stranger to security.

The stranger was then escorted out of the premises.

Reddit

Moreover, the act of kicking someone out of a shared space can trigger feelings of powerlessness in both parties involved. Research from the University of California, Berkeley, highlights how social hierarchies influence our behavior in communal living situations. When an individual feels that their authority is being challenged, they may resort to actions that appear harsh or unfeeling.

It is important for individuals to reflect on the motivations behind their actions and consider alternative, empathetic responses that align with their values.

The OP and his flatmates had a discussion about it.

Most agreed that calling security was the right call, while one person believed that the stranger shouldn't have been kicked out.

Reddit

There was no way of knowing the stranger's intentions.

They were trespassing, to boot. The stranger had to be kicked out.

Reddit

Building Empathy Through Understanding

In scenarios involving homelessness, building empathy can be a powerful tool for social connection. A study from Yale University found that when individuals are exposed to narratives about the lives of homeless people, their levels of empathy and willingness to help significantly increase. This suggests that sharing stories and experiences can foster a deeper understanding of the complexities surrounding homelessness.

Encouraging open dialogue about the homeless experience can also lead to community initiatives that address the root causes of homelessness, rather than simply reacting to its symptoms.

The OP would've been the a-hole if he had simply left the stranger in the kitchen. Who knows what they could've done?

Reddit

Watching true crime documentaries will make the OP realize he did the right thing.

Reddit

There was no way the OP could know what this stranger's intentions were. Maybe he only needed a place to spend the night.

But at the same time, he could have stolen the students' belongings or, even worse, done something more harmful. Leaving him in the kitchen could have been dangerous for the students in the premises.

Calling security was indeed the right call. This is one of those situations where safety needed to be the priority.

If they really felt bad for the stranger, the OP and the flatmates could always provide food if they see this homeless person again.

Letting the stranger stay is potentially dangerous for the OP and his flatmates.

Reddit

Sneaking in was a creepy thing to do. The homeless person had to be escorted out because he wasn't supposed to be there.

Reddit

Practically, individuals facing similar dilemmas may benefit from engaging in perspective-taking exercises. Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology indicates that actively attempting to see a situation from another person’s viewpoint can significantly reduce feelings of guilt and increase compassionate responses.

Simple practices such as volunteering at local shelters or participating in community forums can also enhance understanding and empathy, leading to more humane decisions in challenging situations. These actions not only benefit the community but also contribute to personal growth.

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the complexity of decision-making when faced with conflicting values. Feeling guilty for taking action against someone in need reflects a deep-seated desire to be compassionate. It's important to recognize these feelings as valid and to use them as a springboard for making more thoughtful, empathetic choices in the future.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, navigating conflicts involving vulnerable populations requires an awareness of both emotional responses and social responsibilities. Experts suggest that fostering empathy and understanding is key to making compassionate decisions that reflect our values. By engaging with the wider community, individuals can find constructive ways to address their concerns while promoting positive change.