Following the Discovery of an Amusing Friendzone Definition Online, a Lady Elaborates on How Men and Women View Friendship

Tumblr can turn the smallest internet joke into a surprisingly big conversation. That is exactly what happened when one user came across a funny take on the friendzone and decided to unpack why it landed so hard.

In her post, she connects the reaction to how men and women are often taught to handle feelings, friendship, and romance differently. The result is a messy but familiar mismatch, where one person expects emotional closeness and the other sees a friendship instead.

That simple idea was enough to send the post viral, and the comments only added to the debate.

Alara J. Rogers, a Tumblr user, saw this tweet about the friendzone, and a lightbulb moment occurred

Matthew Bland (not the actual photo)

Here's the online post Alara saw...

Tumblr user Alara J. Rogers, with the username 'alarajrogers', coincidentally found a Tumblr post that included a screenshot of two tweets. One is the original tweet, and the second is a reply to that tweet.

For most people, this is a humorous interpretation of the act of friendzoning someone, but for Alara, it was a lightbulb moment.

alarajrogers

She proceeded to clarify how this entertaining interpretation of friendzoning and the reaction to it really makes sense.

alarajrogers

That is where the conversation starts to shift.

alarajrogers

She continues to say...

alarajrogers alarajrogers

Currently, there is a distinction in how men perceive sharing feelings as part of a romantic relationship, while women view it as part of a romantic relationship and, more importantly, a part of friendship as well. This misconception leads men to believe that there should be a romantic connection when there isn’t one.

In the end, both parties become confused and perhaps even hurt. Men suffer from being conditioned in this way, while women struggle because they cannot connect with male friends for basic friendship.

Moving on...

alarajrogers alarajrogers

An example of patriarchy...

alarajrogers

It gets even more pointed from there.

This is similar to the AITA situation where someone asked a friend to stop bringing her SO to every hangout.

alarajrogers

So...

alarajrogers

In turn, both parties end up confused and perhaps even hurt, at the very least. 'So men suffer terribly from being conditioned in this way. But women suffer in that they can’t reach out to male friends for basic friendship.'

Both end up suffering in different ways...

alarajrogers alarajrogers

For that reason...

alarajrogers

That is the part that really sticks.

alarajrogers

Alara states that the best way to address this issue is to teach young men that it is okay to express their feelings, to care for their friends, to communicate their needs, and to share their issues with friends. Moreover, both genders will benefit when this social practice is changed.

Fixing it...

alarajrogers alarajrogers

It didn’t take long for the post to go viral on Tumblr. It received more than 420,000 notes, which is Tumblr’s method of collecting likes and reblogs.

Before you go, what is your take on this 'friendzoning' definition? Why not share your opinion on this in the comments below?

The comments section had plenty to say.

Want the friendzone twist taken further? Read how an AITA poster refused to fund a friend’s dream.