Woman Figures Out Her Future Mother-In-Law Is a Notorious Snoop, So She Leaves Embarrassing Self-Affirmations for Her to Find
"My teeth will regrow! I am sharklike and powerful!"
In a serious relationship, you can only hope that you will get along with the family of your significant other. You may not be dating them, but you have to accept that they will be a part of your life sooner or later.
Your first introduction will most likely be to your future in-laws. Meeting them for the first time is a big deal, but maintaining some sort of cordial relationship with them is even tougher.
OP (original poster) has been seriously dating her fiancé, Al, for four years. They only decided to move in together in OP's house this year.
Despite this decision, Al hasn't moved much of his stuff into OP's house. She says that about 95% of the furniture and belongings in their home are hers.
Al's mom is a regular visitor to the couple's home; unfortunately, she is also a snoop. When she comes over, she goes through their things. Al is used to this, but OP is not.
Due to the fact that most things in the house are OP's, Al's mom is actually snooping on OP's belongings. When OP vocalized her concern, the mom's response was, "I was just helping with chores."
On the other hand, Al tells OP to let it slide because his mom has a lot of "nervous energy." As people who stick their noses in places where they don't belong will tell you, they will eventually find something they won't like.
Al's mom stumbled upon a note in OP's home office. Placed on OP's monitor, a tiny affirmation note reads, "I am smart, I am skilled, I am deserving of great things," a trick her therapist told her would help OP before interviews.
Instead of ignoring the note, Al's mom made a comment about OP's ego. To OP's credit, she took the side comment in stride but decided to play a little game with Al's mom.
With the help of her friend, OP made a bunch of fake affirmation notes and left them around the house for Al's mom to find during her next snooping adventure.
jemmi44
jemmi44"She's just going through my stuff."
jemmi44
jemmi44
Here are some of the best affirmation notes OP and her friend wrote:
jemmi44
It worked because Al's mom definitely found them; she started to act strangely around OP.
jemmi44
When OP went out to run some errands, OP's future mother-in-law talked to Al about OP's egotistical and unstable nature.
She told Al it was a bad idea to move in with OP and showed him the prank affirmation notes. Al didn't have a clue how to react and asked OP what they were.
OP explained that they were just silly notes to boost her self-esteem and to make herself laugh. She asked Al how his mom got them and if she had been poking through her things.
jemmi44
Al said his mom was cleaning when she found them and thought they were weird.
OP defended herself by saying that Al should know by now that she's just an odd person, and if he didn't want his mom finding OP's "weird stuff," then he should stop her from going through her things.
jemmi44
Al asked if OP left the notes to annoy his mom.
She admitted that they were a silly joke, but she actually had issues with her going through her private things and that he should stop her before she finds something that is truly weird. Al said that OP is putting him in an awkward position.
He excused his mom's behavior by saying she's just really protective of him and needs to adjust to the idea of him moving in with a girlfriend for the first time. He said OP's prank was giving his mom the impression that OP wouldn't be a good partner for him when he's trying to make them get along.
jemmi44
Is OP at fault here? Reddit certainly doesn't think so, and they believe she should have gone bolder with the notes.
Aunty_Fascist
OP almost went for it with the ~interesting~ items Al's mom could find, but she admits she did get frustrated with the invasion of privacy.
jemmi44
She's seriously considering just having a conversation to lay it all out to Al's mom.
jemmi44
Commenters think OP has an opportunity to re-evaluate the situation here.
metalmorian
Going forward with this marriage to Al (and his mom) doesn't seem like a sound decision.
metalmorian
Al is not ready to leave the nest, and his mother is unlikely to let him.
ofcbrooks
Neither makes Al look good by any standards.
Throw-a-Ru
The last quote from the other subreddit is definitely sobering, and OP should read it.
Cantarella702
Al's mom is a prime example of a person who should be told NO.
justchillinghbu87
OP can try to play it this way if the snooping doesn't stop.
BabyAlibi
If Al's mom doesn't respect OP's boundaries, she's bound to find the fun drawer.
jemmi44
It's confusing that he doesn't.
urson_black
But after reading this answer from OP, we are getting a better picture of Al.
jemmi44
The problem here is beyond the invasion of privacy, and OP should really think twice before getting sucked into Al's (and his mom's) issues.
thistheremixhere
Al is a 25-year-old man.
cinnnamonstixx
OP will eventually realize she was right all along; let's hope she doesn't act on that too late.
cardinal29
Setting boundaries is normal and healthy, OP!
cardinal29
Tell her to stop snooping, and if she doesn't, ban her from your house, OP.
gw2kpro
It's obvious that his mom is his priority.
0biterdicta
The real lesson here is: OP is hilarious and can do so much better than Al and his mom (let's face it, they're a package deal).
Darkrai_35
Write these down, friends.
[deleted], MaeBelleLien
On a bad day, repeat that you are sharklike and powerful! OP truly did nothing wrong in this situation; she was being spied on in her own home, and her significant other refused to back her up.
OP should stand firm on this because this issue could definitely be a deal-breaker. With affirmations like that, OP will eventually realize that she's too good for the likes of Al (and his mom)!
