15 People Share The Funniest Typical "Mom Things"
"A jacket is what you wear when your mother is cold."
Moms have a way of making the ordinary feel unforgettable. From the way they worry about your schedule to the way they repeat the same warnings forever, their habits can be funny, familiar, and oddly comforting all at once.
This roundup pulls together a bunch of classic “mom things” people recognize instantly, from nonstop check-ins to the kind of advice that somehow sticks for years. The details are different, but the energy is the same, and that is exactly why these stories land.
Some of these examples are so specific they feel universal, and a few might sound a little too familiar. Read on.
1. When mom calls…
“Mom 1 min ago: “Where are you??”
Mom 2 min ago: “Why aren’t you picking up my calls?”
Mom 3 min ago: “You are normally home at 5:32 PM on the dot. It is 5:33 PM. Are you home? Where are you?”
Then you call her back less than a minute after the last call/text, and she doesn’t answer.”
That timing is painfully familiar.
2. This one is a classic…
“Be sure to use the bathroom before you go anywhere. You never know when you’re going to find the next one.
I live 2 minutes from work and still use the bathroom before I leave.”
3. You need to sleep more.
“Hearing a ‘fact’ from an ‘expert’ on the news once and believing it forever.
i.e. My mom still thinks I should be getting nine hours and fifteen minutes of sleep after hearing that figure on the Today Show over a decade ago.”
4. Scary vacuum cleaner.
“Vacuuming when they’re angry so everyone knows they’re angry, and everyone is super uncomfortable. It’s loud and scary, and I just want to die.”
Even the vacuum gets dragged into it.
5. Adrenaline rush.
“Moms are freakishly strong when they need to be. I remember my wife running away from an angry skunk, one kid in each arm.”
6. Just in case…
“While driving with you in the passenger seat, they throw their arm across you if they have to hit the brakes.”
7. "Stop that"
“Tom! Dave! Brad! YOU! Stop that!”
That “my childhood room, my rules” fight is similar to the debate over stopping Mom from turning a childhood bedroom into an office.
8. Oh, so true…
“The temperature might get down into the 70s. ‘Make sure you bring a jacket’ - A jacket is what you wear when your mother is cold.”
Cold weather advice always comes with a backup plan.
9. And you wait for the braking noises.
“My mom would angrily wash the dishes. All you would hear was slamming cutlery. It was terrifying.”
10. You have been warned.
“OMG, a natural disaster/murder/major crime happened in a country you want to visit one day. You should never, ever go there. EVER.”
11. Old school.
“Texting with one finger while holding the phone entirely in the palm of their other hand.”
12. Immediate change…
“Mom screaming at the kids… phone rings… total personality shift! The caller would never believe we were fearing for our lives 0.3 seconds ago!”
That switch is almost impressive.
13. In public…
“Licked her fingers to straighten out your eyebrows/stray hair/etc.”
14. Keeping hydrated is important.
“Me: (describes some type of physical ailment) Mom: “How much water have you drunk today?”
Every time.”
15. Mom knows how to make you feel better…
“Mom knows why you hate that girl Shelby from high school and goes out of her way to casually let you know that last Thursday she saw Shelby at the gym, and goddamn has she gotten fat.
Love you, Mom.”
Somehow, that is both petty and sweet.
For more Mother’s Day control drama, read about a mom who calls her daughter selfish after she refuses a dress.
