Teen Refuses To Make Free Slideshows For His Mom — And The Internet’s Divided Over Whether He’s “Selfish” Or Just Setting Boundaries

When one 16-year-old was asked by his mom to make some slideshow videos “with pictures and music and stuff,” he didn’t expect it to turn into a family drama. What seemed like a simple favor quickly spiraled into a debate about boundaries, respect, and whether kids owe their parents unpaid labor.

It started when his mother walked into the living room and casually asked if he’d take on “some projects” for her. Curious, he asked what she meant — and that’s when she explained she wanted him to make a few videos featuring photos and music.

But when he asked if she’d be paying him for the work, she immediately said no. Her quick refusal — and apparent shock at the question — set the tone for the uncomfortable exchange that followed.

The Reddit user told her straight: between school, figure skating, volunteer work, getting his driver’s license, editing YouTube videos, library visits, and seeing his dad, there just wasn’t time to add unpaid side projects to his plate. He wasn’t being lazy — he was just being honest about his schedule and priorities.

Still, his mother looked taken aback, almost offended that her son would even bring up the idea of payment. It clearly wasn’t the response she expected from her teenage son, especially one she might’ve assumed would jump at the chance to help.

In his mind, though, this wasn’t about defiance or disrespect. It was about recognizing that his time has value — and that he’s not obligated to drop everything just because a parent asks.

The OP later reflected on it and admitted he was already behind on schoolwork and driving practice. He felt a wave of guilt for saying no, but at the same time, he knew it wasn’t fair to add yet another unpaid task to his growing list of responsibilities.

He figured that if his mom really wanted those slideshow videos done, she could easily pay someone else to make them. After all, she wouldn’t expect a professional editor to work for free — so why should she expect that from her own son?

Even so, the guilt crept in. He couldn’t help but wonder if saying no made him selfish or ungrateful, especially since his mom likely viewed it as a harmless request.

Now, the teen’s torn between feeling proud of himself for setting boundaries and feeling like he might’ve let his mom down. He posted his story online to ask if he was being the “bad guy,” and the responses were surprisingly split.

Some people applauded him for recognizing his own limits and standing firm. They pointed out that many parents unintentionally take advantage of their kids’ skills — especially when it comes to tech-related favors — without realizing how time-consuming those requests really are.

Others, though, argued that family is about helping each other out, not nickel-and-diming every favor. They said his mom might have just been hoping to bond over something creative and didn’t deserve to be met with a price tag.

But plenty of commenters came to his defense, insisting that his stance wasn’t about money — it was about respect. One person wrote that asking for payment wasn’t rude; it was a way to communicate that his time and energy aren’t infinite.

Many agreed that kids, especially teens with busy schedules, deserve to prioritize their own commitments. Saying “no” doesn’t make someone selfish — it just means they’re aware of their bandwidth and unwilling to burn out for someone else’s convenience.

Still, others empathized with the mom, noting that she might have felt hurt because she saw the request as something simple and personal. Maybe she just wanted to feel included in her son’s world — especially if she sees him pouring energy into his YouTube channel but not her projects.

Either way, the conversation sparked a much bigger question: when does helping family cross the line into unpaid labor? And at what point do teenagers have the right to start treating their time as their own?

In the end, the teen stood by his choice but admitted he still felt conflicted. He wants to maintain a good relationship with his mom, but he also wants her to understand that his plate is already overflowing.

He summed it up perfectly — it’s not that he doesn’t care, it’s that he’s learning to care for himself too. And sometimes, that means saying “no,” even when it feels uncomfortable.

Her quick refusal — and apparent shock at the question — set the tone for the uncomfortable exchange that followed.

AI-generated image

Here’s the original post by Reddit user ‘FarWalrus3604’.

Today my mother came into the living room and asked"if i gave you some projects would you do it for me?" I (16M) asked "like what?" and she elaborated, saying"like some slide show videos with pictures and music and stuff" I then said "Will you pay me?" and she very quickly said no. She looked shocked and somewhat offended so i explained that with school, figure skating, volunteer work, getting my driver's license, editing my own YouTube videos, going to the library, and visiting my dad i simply didn't have any free time that wasn't for me.at the time I was thinking about the fact that I was already behind on school and my license and that I don't owe her a task like that that she can pay someone else to do but now I'm worried that I'm being selfish and difficult.I feel like it's about time I stop doing whatever she wants for free, especially since I dont have the time but I also worry that I'm doing it all wrong.AITA or am I doing the logical thing?

Understanding Boundaries

Child development experts emphasize the importance of setting boundaries, especially during adolescence. Dr. Michael Thompson, a renowned child psychologist, points out that this age is critical for learning to balance autonomy with familial obligations.

He explains that when teens set limits on their time and energy, it fosters a sense of self-respect and independence. This, in turn, prepares them for adult relationships where mutual respect is essential.

Thompson suggests parents engage in open dialogues about expectations to prevent misunderstandings and foster healthier family dynamics.

Here’s how the Reddit community reacted.

No_Control8031

YTA.

Fluffy-Promise-8738

Family therapists often observe that familial conflicts around chores or favors can lead to deeper issues of respect and appreciation. A relationship expert noted that unspoken expectations can create resentment, especially if the roles within the family aren't clearly defined.

Encouraging families to establish clear communication about responsibilities can help mitigate this tension. This could mean setting a family meeting to discuss each member's contributions and to express gratitude, fostering a more collaborative environment.

Pretty sure your mom pays for most of the things you mentioned.

Brother-Cane

Okay, but you do have the time.

Embarrassed-Draw109

You shouldn’t expect payment for a favor.

twelvedayslate

The Role of Communication

Dr. William Doherty, a family therapist, highlights the significance of communication in family relationships. He suggests that parents should ask their children about their comfort levels regarding tasks like creating slideshows.

By involving teens in discussions about expectations and limits, families can prevent feelings of entitlement and resentment from arising. This method not only encourages mutual respect but also strengthens family bonds, as children feel heard and valued.

Establishing a culture of open dialogue can lead to healthier relationships and greater understanding within the family.

Show some appreciation.

chaserscarlet

No explanation needed.

maybebaebea

She’s your mom!

ZomB-Boy

Experts in adolescent psychology suggest that feelings of obligation can stem from parental expectations, leading to internal conflict for teens. Dr. Janet Lansbury, a parenting expert, believes fostering independence is key to helping children navigate these challenges.

She recommends creating opportunities for children to express their feelings about chores and responsibilities. This can help parents understand their children's perspectives and adjust their requests accordingly. This dynamic encourages a collaborative family environment where everyone's needs are acknowledged.

It’s called being family.

aliceyeh001

So selfish.

Howzithangin777

Just help your mother.

Dizzy_Army_936

Teaching Financial Literacy

Financial experts often highlight the importance of teaching children about money management from a young age. This context applies to the teen's situation, as asking for payment for services can be a valuable lesson in understanding worth.

Financial planners suggest parents introduce concepts of fair compensation for work, which can help teens grasp the value of their time and effort. Encouraging discussions about money can empower children to make informed decisions about their labor and contributions in the future.

She won’t be around forever.

Cool_Layer_1190

That’s sarcasm.

DeannaMorgan

Be nice to your mom.

Far_Shop_3135

As families navigate discussions about responsibilities, it's vital to recognize the impact of societal expectations on interpersonal dynamics. Relationship experts often note that cultural norms can influence how families perceive roles and obligations.

By understanding these influences, families can work towards creating a more equitable distribution of tasks, respecting each member's contribution. Additionally, seeking feedback from family members about how they feel regarding their roles can lead to more harmonious relationships.

Whether you think he’s setting a healthy boundary or being a little too transactional, one thing’s clear: growing up means realizing that your time has value — even when the person asking for it is family.

Expert Opinion

This scenario highlights a crucial developmental stage in adolescence: the struggle for autonomy and boundary-setting. The teen's decision to ask for payment isn’t just about the money; it symbolizes a recognition of his own value and the importance of prioritizing his time amidst a busy schedule. It’s a common psychological conflict for young people to balance familial expectations with their own needs, and navigating this can lead to healthier relationships if approached with understanding from both sides.

Research-Based Understanding

In conclusion, navigating family dynamics requires an understanding of boundaries, open communication, and respect for each member's contributions. As noted by experts like Dr. Michael Thompson and Dr. William Doherty, fostering an environment where family members can express their needs and feelings is crucial.

By setting clear expectations and encouraging dialogue, families can mitigate conflicts that arise around responsibilities. Ultimately, these strategies not only lead to healthier relationships but also empower teens to develop a sense of autonomy and self-worth.