Young Woman Refuses to Let Mom See Her Newborn Baby Because She Was Pushing for Abortion

We have OP, a 26-year-old woman who found out she was pregnant. When she shared the news with her mother, her mom immediately urged her to get an abortion and even offered to pay for it.

However, OP had no intention of having an abortion and chose to continue with the pregnancy. This led to a rift between them, and OP decided to cut contact with her mother for two months.

Eventually, her mother reached out to mend things, and OP, being the caring daughter, decided to give her another chance. However, things didn't improve much, and her mother criticized every idea OP had about her pregnancy.

From maternity photos to the baby shower, her mother dismissed everything, even though she had promised to plan and throw the shower herself.

As the pregnancy progressed, OP faced complications with preeclampsia and was hospitalized. Instead of showing support, her mother blamed her for the situation, claiming it was due to her not taking care of herself.

When it came time for delivery, her mother demanded to be in the room, even though OP hadn't agreed to it. This led to a heated exchange of texts and calls while OP was being induced for 12 hours straight.

Eventually, an emergency c-section was performed, and OP's mother continued to spread false information about who was in the delivery room.

After giving birth, OP experienced postpartum complications, and her mother continued her lies and manipulations, causing OP to work hard to clear her name with the family. Despite all this drama, her mother still expects to have a relationship with OP and her daughter, but OP is hesitant due to her mother's narcissism and chronic lying.

Despite the difficult situation, OP feels conflicted because her father has passed away, and her mother is her only surviving parent.

The question OP has for the internet is whether or not she's in the wrong in this situation. Be sure to scroll down and read the full story, along with some of the best comments left by other Redditors.

When OP Found Out She Was Pregnant, Her Mother Begged Her to Get an Abortion

u/Cxxchie_Man

After Two Months Without Contact, OP's Mom Reached Out to Her Again

u/Cxxchie_Man

OP Wouldn't Let Her into the Delivery Room

u/Cxxchie_Man

The Impact of Past Decisions

The decision to deny the mother access to her newborn can reflect deeply rooted issues of trust and emotional safety. Research in developmental psychology indicates that early experiences with caregivers can shape an individual's perception of relationships. In this case, the mother's history of advocating for abortion may have created a protective instinct in the daughter, leading her to prioritize her child's well-being above all else.

OP's Mom Was Furious When She Found Out That She's Not Allowed in the Delivery Room

u/Cxxchie_Man

After the Birth, OP Got a Call from Her Little Brother

u/Cxxchie_Man

OP's Mom Was Spreading Lies the Entire Time

u/Cxxchie_Man

This protective behavior aligns with attachment theory, which suggests that individuals often respond to perceived threats based on their experiences with caregivers. The daughter may fear that her mother’s past actions could negatively influence her child's emotional development. Studies suggest that when caregivers exhibit narcissistic or unstable behaviors, it can significantly impact the next generation's ability to form secure attachments.

OP Is Now Thinking That She Might Have Done Something Wrong in This Situation, So She Turned to Reddit

u/Cxxchie_Man

Monster, Not Mother

u/ThotsforTaterTots

Insane Mom

u/ElBorracho89

Navigating Complex Emotions

It's important to recognize that the emotional landscape in such situations is often complex. Research from the Journal of Family Psychology highlights that feelings of resentment, anger, and fear can coexist, leading to difficult decisions. The daughter’s reluctance to introduce her newborn to the mother reflects a desire to protect her child from potential toxicity.

OP Doesn't Need Any Additional Drama

u/3xlduck

It's essential to set boundaries to protect the child and oneself from any potential harm. A healthy relationship between grandparent and grandchild should be based on trust, respect, and love.

If OP's mother is unwilling to take responsibility for her actions or apologize, it's reasonable for OP to be cautious about allowing her into their lives.

Family dynamics can be complicated, especially when dealing with difficult relationships and past trauma. However, OP must prioritize her daughter's welfare and her emotional well-being.

In navigating these feelings, it may be beneficial for the daughter to engage in reflective practices to better understand her emotions and their origins. Additionally, seeking support from a therapist could provide her with the tools to process her feelings and explore whether a relationship with her mother could be healthy for her child.

Building Healthy Boundaries

Establishing clear boundaries is crucial for maintaining emotional safety. The daughter might consider setting specific conditions under which she would feel comfortable allowing her mother to meet her child. Engaging in open conversations about these boundaries can foster mutual understanding and respect, ultimately creating a healthier dynamic.

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the intricate dynamics of trust and emotional safety in familial relationships. It's essential for the daughter to prioritize her child's well-being and establish boundaries that protect their emotional health.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Understanding the psychological factors at play in parental relationships can provide valuable insights into personal decision-making. By fostering emotional safety and establishing boundaries, individuals can navigate complex family dynamics more effectively.