Redditor Asks For Advice On How To Deal With His "Massively Overweight" Father

Family relationships can become strained for a myriad of reasons. After all, life presents us with plenty to deal with, both good and bad.

Reddit user u/catsinthecradleandth recently shared a story in the AITA (Am I The A**hole?) subreddit about the damaged relationship he has with his food-addicted father. The original poster explained that his dad is "massively overweight," and although he has lost almost 100 lbs over the past six months, he still weighs more than 300 lbs.

The OP says his father has been overweight his whole life, and up until recently, he has been in denial about it. The Redditor's parents were in the process of getting divorced when his mother sadly passed away.

Thus, his father was all the OP had left, and he says, "it sucked" because his dad was always too overweight to do anything with him as a child. The OP states he had to create his own life, and skateboarding became his passion.

The Redditor is graduating high school soon and plans to move away from home to work in a friend's skate shop. He mentions that his father is upset because, now that he is getting better, he wants the OP to get to know him as a non-addict.

However, the OP says that although he loves his father, he feels his efforts are too little, too late at this point. Keep scrolling to see how people reacted.

The OP posted about the damaged relationship he has with his food-addicted father.

Reddit/catsinthecradleandth

The Redditor says he had to create his own life, and skateboarding became his passion.

Reddit/catsinthecradleandth

The OP is graduating high school soon and plans to move away from home to work in a friend's skate shop.

Reddit/catsinthecradleandth

Understanding the Impact of Family Dynamics on Health

Dr. Samuel Lee, a health psychologist, explains that family dynamics can significantly influence individual health behaviors.

Research shows that children often model their behaviors after their parents, which can lead to unhealthy patterns if not addressed.

This scenario illustrates how a father's struggles with weight may have impacted his relationship with his son, leading to feelings of disappointment and frustration.

But his father is upset because, now that he is getting better, he wants the OP to get to know him as a non-addict.

Reddit/catsinthecradleandth

But, the OP says that although he loves his father, he feels his efforts are too little, too late at this point.

Reddit/catsinthecradleandth

Here's how people reacted.

Reddit/After-Blacksmith-711

The Redditor's feelings of resentment towards his father reflect broader issues related to expectations and disappointment.

According to Dr. Terri Orbuch, a relationship researcher, "Unmet expectations in family relationships can create a cycle of disappointment that leads to emotional distress." Understanding these dynamics can help individuals process their feelings more effectively.

"It's too little, too late."

Reddit/Impressive-Amoeba-97

"You need to live your life."

Reddit/Shiney2510

"If he can't put your needs first after a lifetime of neglect, he has bigger issues than food."

Reddit/capmanor1755

The Role of Compassion in Family Health

Compassion is essential in navigating family relationships, particularly when dealing with health-related issues.

Research indicates that fostering compassion can improve family communication and reduce conflict.

By approaching health discussions with empathy, family members can create a more supportive environment for change.

"Make your own choices."

Reddit/diminishingpatience

"You love him in your own way."

Reddit/LuckyJackAubery

"Do not miss your chance to follow your dreams."

Reddit/Huge_Industry_1259

To address health concerns within the family, open discussions about lifestyle choices are critical.

Experts recommend creating a supportive atmosphere where family members can express their concerns without judgment.

Research shows that families who engage in open discussions about health report greater satisfaction and improved behaviors.

"Explain to your father you are your own man due to his actions."

Reddit/nameofcat

NTA.

Reddit/kimariesingsMD

"It sounds like you still hold a lot of resentment toward him."

Reddit/chxxnclxxs

Emotional Responses to Family Health Issues

Emotional reactions to family health issues can stem from deep-seated fears and anxieties about mortality and well-being.

Studies suggest that when individuals confront health challenges within the family, it can trigger feelings of helplessness and frustration.

Understanding these emotional triggers can help family members navigate their responses more effectively and foster a more positive dynamic.

"Embrace your adulthood."

Reddit/loriteggie

ESH.

Reddit/RefrigeratorRich9007

"It's never too late."

Reddit/RaysUnderwater

"His issues are his."

Reddit/AdelleDeWitt

"Live your life."

Reddit/ComputerCrafty4781

What's your take on this situation? Do you think the OP is being insensitive towards his father, or are his feelings of resentment reasonable under the circumstances?

Either way, it sounds like there has been a lot of pain over the years from both sides. This father and son both have a lot of healing to do, and we hope they're able to find their peace.

Psychological Analysis

This scenario highlights the complexities of familial relationships when health issues are involved.

Encouraging open discussions about health can help mitigate feelings of frustration and foster a more supportive family environment.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Family dynamics play a crucial role in shaping health behaviors and emotional responses.

According to Dr. William Doherty, family therapist, "Addressing family health issues with empathy fosters stronger relationships and promotes better outcomes." By fostering open communication and support, families can navigate health challenges together, as emphasized by Dr. Terri Orbuch, relationship researcher, who states, "Healthy communication is the foundation for overcoming obstacles in family dynamics."