Nervous Student Ends Up In Tears When Criticized By Her Sister After A Performance In Front Of Their Beginner Voice Lessons Class

How you were supported when you’re young plays a significant role in how confident you’ll be when you grow up. This is why it’s important to recognize the cheerleaders you have in life.

There’s a sense of contentment when you know that those cheerleaders are the closest people to you, such as friends and family. But what if it turns out that they don’t actually support you?

In a r/AITA post, a Redditor was confused about whether she was the TA for not supporting her incredibly shy sister. She narrated that they were taking the same voice lessons at a community college. 

Her sister was the youngest in the class, so others tended to take care of her more, especially their mom’s friend’s daughter, Anna, who also drives her to and from class. 

After lessons were taught only virtually, it was time for them to perform in person. Anna went around and asked everyone to applaud OP’s sister, no matter how well she would do, since she was very nervous. 

At the end of the performance, everyone clapped except OP. She also made comments that caused her sister to cry.

Anna said a few words to OP about her comments, and when she came home, her mom yelled at her for making her sister cry for half an hour. OP doesn’t think she was wrong, but after being confronted, she was left wondering if she was the TA.

This is OP's problem

aitasistersing

OP and her sister have been taking the same voice lessons, and usually, her sister is babied by the other older students

aitasistersing

Anna is the one who usually takes care of her sister during these classes

aitasistersing

Performance Anxiety and Its Roots

Performance anxiety is a common experience among individuals participating in public displays of skill, such as singing. Dr. James Carter, a clinical psychologist specializing in performance issues, explains that this anxiety can stem from a fear of judgment or failure. Research indicates that social comparison plays a significant role in heightening anxiety levels, especially among peers, as individuals worry about how they will be perceived.

The neurobiological underpinnings of performance anxiety suggest that heightened arousal can trigger the fight-or-flight response, causing the individual to feel overwhelmed and emotionally distressed.

Performance Anxiety and Its Effects

The situation with the nervous student illustrates how performance anxiety can significantly impact one's emotional state, especially in public speaking or performance scenarios. Research shows that performance anxiety is a common experience for many individuals, often rooted in fear of judgment and negative evaluation from peers. According to a study published in the Psychological Bulletin, these feelings can lead to emotional dysregulation, manifesting as tears or panic during performances.

Understanding this anxiety is crucial, as it can affect not only performance outcomes but also self-esteem and motivation.

OP's sister was super nervous when the day of the performance came

aitasistersing

OP was confronted about her criticisms

aitasistersing

Her mom also scolded her about how she made her sister cry

aitasistersing

Studies in the field of psychology demonstrate that performance anxiety can lead to a cycle of avoidance, where individuals shy away from situations that might evoke these feelings. This cycle can perpetuate feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt, creating a barrier to improvement. In the context of this scenario, the sister's criticism may have inadvertently intensified the student's anxiety, making it difficult for her to embrace opportunities for growth.

Promoting a supportive environment where constructive feedback is delivered thoughtfully can ease such anxieties.

In addition, the concept of the 'compliment sandwich' used in feedback can be an effective strategy for reducing anxiety and promoting constructive criticism. Research has shown that when individuals receive feedback framed positively, it can enhance their receptiveness and reduce defensiveness. This approach encourages a balanced perspective, helping students feel more confident and less anxious about their performance.

Practicing this technique can strengthen relationships between peers, fostering an atmosphere of support and encouragement.

As a theatre teacher at the college level, honoring a person’s work is really important

thislsnotoveryet

There might be different rules regarding feedback, but it felt like it was more than that

thislsnotoveryet

In other situations, only the teachers are allowed to give critiques

snarkisms

Building Confidence Through Feedback

Constructive criticism is crucial for personal development, but its delivery is paramount. Dr. Lisa Nguyen, an expert in educational psychology, notes that employing a 'compliment sandwich' approach can help mitigate negative emotional responses. Research suggests that when feedback is framed positively, individuals are more likely to engage with it and use it for improvement.

Encouraging family members to practice this method can create a more supportive dialogue around performance, helping individuals build confidence while addressing areas for growth.

The Role of Self-Compassion in Performance

Self-compassion can play a vital role in reducing performance anxiety and enhancing emotional resilience. Studies indicate that individuals who practice self-compassion are better equipped to cope with failures and setbacks, allowing them to approach challenges with a growth mindset. By encouraging self-kindness and understanding rather than self-criticism, students can build resilience against performance-related stress.

This shift in mindset can significantly improve their overall experience and performance outcomes.

It is better if the critiques are given privately just in case the performer doesn’t take them well

Weird-Roll6265

This Redditor shared that their art class is different, but that might be because OP’s class is for beginners

jesuisserpent

OP’s comments might be fueled by more than her not liking her sister’s performance

Due-Elderberry7441

Additionally, engaging in mindfulness practices can help individuals manage their anxiety before performances. Techniques such as deep breathing, visualization, and positive affirmations can be effective in reducing pre-performance jitters. A study published in the Journal of Applied Sport Psychology emphasizes that athletes who incorporate mindfulness techniques often experience lower levels of anxiety and improved performance outcomes.

Integrating these practices into pre-performance routines can empower individuals to approach their performances with greater calm and confidence.

To help the nervous student cope with anxiety, establishing a supportive environment is essential. Teachers and peers should create a culture of understanding, where sharing vulnerabilities is encouraged. Research indicates that supportive relationships can buffer against anxiety and improve performance outcomes, making it crucial for students to feel safe when expressing their fears.

Encouraging open discussions about performance anxiety can normalize these feelings and help students feel less isolated.

OP didn’t say anything more about their family, but there are doubts if she wanted people to know that they are related

lenny_ray

Not dragging someone after a nerve-wracking performance or a beginner’s performance is common knowledge

lenny_ray

What OP did could have disregarded the true purpose of their class

LF3000

Coping Strategies for Performance Anxiety

Implementing coping strategies can significantly help students manage performance anxiety. Techniques such as deep breathing, visualization, and mindfulness have been shown to reduce feelings of anxiety before performances. According to research published in the Journal of Abnormal Psychology, these practices can activate the body's relaxation response, countering anxiety symptoms.

Integrating these techniques into pre-performance routines can empower students to approach their performances with greater confidence.

Compliment sandwich

agillila

OP was regarded as the TA in this situation. It was because the way she gave her critique wasn’t appropriate according to most people in the comments. 

There were also theories that OP was driven by different motives; that’s why she chose to tell her sister what she thought at the time and place that she did. Other Redditors encouraged her to cherish her time with her sister instead of being resentful about it. 

Finally, it’s critical to understand that performance anxiety is a common issue and that many individuals experience it at some point in their lives. Acknowledging this reality can help normalize the experience for students and reduce the stigma associated with anxiety. Studies suggest that normalizing these feelings can empower individuals to seek help and develop effective coping mechanisms.

Creating an environment that acknowledges and embraces vulnerability can foster growth and resilience among students.

Psychological Analysis

This situation illustrates the profound impact that performance anxiety can have on students. Emotional responses such as tears often indicate deeper feelings of vulnerability and fear of judgment.

Creating a supportive environment where students feel safe to express their anxieties can significantly enhance their emotional resilience and performance outcomes.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, addressing performance anxiety requires a multifaceted approach that includes self-compassion, supportive environments, and effective coping strategies. By fostering a culture of understanding and encouragement, individuals can navigate performance challenges more confidently. Implementing these strategies not only enhances performance outcomes but also contributes to emotional well-being.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, addressing performance anxiety requires a multifaceted approach that combines constructive feedback with mindfulness techniques. By fostering a supportive environment and encouraging open communication, individuals can overcome their fears and embrace opportunities for growth.

As research suggests, the journey to confidence in performance is a gradual process that benefits from understanding and compassion.