Pregnant Woman Decides Not To Tell Her Husband That Their Baby Was Kicking, Husband Finds Out In The Most Shocking Way

It's normal to be afraid of situations that make you feel unsafe or uncomfortable. For many individuals, this includes pregnancy and childbirth.

However, these feelings hardly ever interfere with everyday life. When you have phobias, you experience intense fear and take extra precautions to escape certain situations.

You might struggle to control your irrational thoughts and actions. Phobias can occasionally prevent people from achieving their life objectives, such as starting a family or expanding one.

People who become pregnant may not be happy about it and may attempt to conceal their developing child. There is no reason to feel ashamed of getting pregnant, and you shouldn't have to go through these emotions by yourself.

One of the first actions you can take to find relief is to speak with your healthcare practitioner or a therapist, as the OP and her husband did. Yes, the OP in today's story has had a fear of pregnancy her entire life.

She and her husband were going to get a surrogate, but she ended up pregnant. They went to therapy, where they decided to go through it together.

The OP doesn't want people touching her stomach, so she never told her husband when the baby started kicking. The husband found out the hard way, and he wasn't happy about it.

Keep scrolling to read the entire story for yourself. 

The Headline

u/No-Holiday-8703

They compromised and decided to use a surrogate, but the OP ended up pregnant

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He was worried that I was so late in pregnancy without feeling any movement

u/No-Holiday-8703

The Psychology of Secrecy in Relationships

Dr. Amy Cuddy from Harvard University emphasizes that secrecy in relationships can create a significant emotional divide. When one partner chooses to withhold information, such as the baby’s kicking, it can lead to feelings of betrayal and mistrust.

Research suggests that transparent communication is essential for fostering intimacy and connection, which can be jeopardized when secrets are kept.

Communication and Boundaries in Relationships

This situation reflects the complexities of communication and boundary-setting in relationships. According to Dr. Harville Hendrix, a renowned relationship expert, "Effective communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship." When individuals fail to express their needs or feelings, misunderstandings can arise, leading to conflict and emotional distance. As noted by Dr. Michele Weiner-Davis, a marriage therapist, "Open dialogue is essential to maintain intimacy and connection in a partnership."

The OP talked it over with my mom and she agreed that she was harsh to him

u/No-Holiday-8703

Let's head over to the comments and read what other redditors had to say

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This Redditor needs some additional info

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According to Dr. Daniel Goleman, a leading expert on emotional intelligence, "Keeping secrets can lead to heightened anxiety and stress, which can erode trust in relationships." This anxiety often arises from fears of judgment or rejection, causing emotional distancing between partners. Building a foundation of trust and openness is essential, as Dr. Goleman emphasizes that "open communication fosters healthier interactions and strengthens bonds." By addressing concerns openly, couples can mitigate feelings of anxiety and enhance their relationship.

The choice of the pregnant woman to withhold information about her baby kicking may indicate underlying fears around vulnerability and trust. Research indicates that individuals often struggle with sharing personal experiences when they fear judgment or rejection.

Understanding these fears can help partners cultivate a more supportive environment where open communication is encouraged and valued.

Is he not meant to be your husband?

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Using that to expand his non-involvement

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How this Redditor believes the marriage will end up

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Understanding Boundaries in Relationships

Setting and respecting boundaries is crucial in intimate relationships, especially when it comes to sharing personal experiences. Dr. Harriet Lerner, a clinical psychologist, emphasizes that boundaries are essential for maintaining self-respect and healthy dynamics.

Her research highlights that partners must communicate their boundaries clearly to foster mutual respect and understanding, preventing misunderstandings and emotional pain.

The Role of Emotional Connection

Emotional connection is fundamental to relationship satisfaction, particularly during significant life changes such as pregnancy. A psychologist from Harvard Medical School explains that sharing experiences fosters intimacy and strengthens bonds between partners.

Studies show that couples who actively engage in emotional sharing experience higher levels of satisfaction and resilience in their relationships.

What is wrong with letting him bond with your child?

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You have to trust in a relationship, and you didn't

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Not trusting him to respect your boundaries

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To navigate situations involving secrecy, couples can benefit from establishing regular check-ins to discuss feelings and experiences openly. Techniques from couples therapy, such as active listening, can enhance understanding and reduce the emotional distance that secrecy often creates.

Research indicates that creating intentional moments of connection can help couples build trust and intimacy over time.

To promote healthier communication, partners can benefit from creating safe spaces to discuss their feelings and experiences. Techniques such as active listening and validation can encourage openness and enhance emotional intimacy.

Additionally, establishing regular check-ins to discuss emotional well-being can help both partners feel connected and understood, fostering greater empathy.

This Redditor's husband's way of being included

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Never withhold information because you don't want to discuss it

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You need to sort yourself out

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Cultural Influences on Parenting Practices

Cultural norms heavily influence parenting practices and expectations about sharing experiences within a relationship. Dr. Joan Grusec from the University of Toronto emphasizes that varying cultural backgrounds can shape how couples navigate their roles and responsibilities.

Understanding these influences can provide insight into differing perspectives on sharing experiences, fostering greater empathy and communication between partners.

Addressing Emotional Vulnerability

The reluctance to share significant experiences can stem from fears of vulnerability. A clinical psychologist notes that individuals often associate vulnerability with weakness, which can hinder emotional expression within relationships.

Research indicates that embracing vulnerability can lead to deeper connections, as it creates opportunities for authenticity and trust.

You should not be married or having a kid

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Your husband is not your college buddy

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You are possibly insecure and freaking out

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To encourage openness in a relationship, partners should create a safe space for sharing experiences without fear of judgment. Techniques such as expressing appreciation and validating each other's feelings can help lower defenses and promote honest dialogue.

Research supports that fostering a non-judgmental environment can enhance emotional safety and intimacy in relationships.

To navigate fears around vulnerability, individuals can practice self-reflection to understand their emotional barriers. Engaging in therapeutic practices, such as journaling or mindfulness, can also help individuals articulate their feelings and develop a greater sense of emotional security.

Ultimately, fostering a culture of vulnerability within relationships can enhance intimacy and connection.

You stated your boundaries about being touched

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You didn't trust him to respect your boundaries

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Don't randomly try to feel my stomach

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The Importance of Emotional Transparency

Emotional transparency is vital for building trust and intimacy in relationships. Dr. John Gottman’s research emphasizes that couples who engage in honest and open communication are more likely to have satisfying relationships.

His studies indicate that emotional transparency allows partners to feel seen and understood, fostering a deeper connection and resilience against conflicts.

This Redditor has the complete opposite of this story

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That's not what most mothers say to the father

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This will not end well for any of you

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A lot of individuals experience pregnancy anxiety, as some individuals avoid getting pregnant due to this phobia. However, the OP is pregnant, and her husband can't provide her with proper support if she's not letting him know what's going on with the progress of her pregnancy.

Let us know your thoughts about this story by dropping a comment below and sharing as well.

Psychological Analysis

This scenario highlights the critical role of communication in relationships, especially during emotionally charged experiences like pregnancy. The woman's choice to withhold information may stem from fears of vulnerability and the complexities of sharing such personal experiences.

Encouraging open dialogue about feelings can significantly enhance emotional intimacy and strengthen the partnership.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

This situation illustrates the intricacies of communication and emotional sharing in relationships, particularly during pivotal life moments. By addressing fears around vulnerability and fostering open communication, partners can enhance their emotional connection and overall satisfaction.

Ultimately, creating a supportive environment where both partners feel safe to share their experiences is vital for relationship growth.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Understanding the psychological dynamics of secrecy and boundaries can significantly improve relationship satisfaction. Research supports the value of emotional transparency and open communication as cornerstones for developing trust and intimacy, leading to healthier partnerships.