Reddit Post Title: AITA for kicking out my father over sexist comments about housework?

Are you wondering if you're in the wrong for kicking your father out after he made "harmless" comments? The Reddit thread is ablaze with opinions on this family dilemma.

The original post details a history of a father who refused to do housework and the fallout that followed. The OP, now an adult, maintains a chore board with their partner to ensure equal responsibility.

When the father visited and made sexist remarks about the division of labor, tensions escalated. The father defended his outdated views, leading to his eviction from the OP's home.

Commenters overwhelmingly support the OP's decision, labeling the father as the antagonist in this scenario. Many point out the irony of his advice, given his failed marriage due to similar beliefs.

Some reflect on societal progress regarding gender roles, highlighting the father's regressive mindset. The thread showcases a mix of empathy for the OP's situation and criticism of the father's behavior.

Whether you side with the OP or the father, the discussion delves into deeper issues of respect, equality, and generational differences.

Original Post

My father is a typical guy for his age group. He never lifted a finger to do housework.

I can’t remember him doing housework even once in my childhood memories. My mom and he both worked, and she would do all the housework and childcare.

My brother and I were raised by my mom, and my dad would hang out with us for 1-2 hours on weekends before disappearing to his man cave to watch TV. She complained to him a lot about it when I was younger, and he didn’t take it seriously until she filed for divorce the moment we were off to college.

To this day, he claims she gave him no warning and divorced him out of nowhere. As an adult, I made sure that anyone I dated knew how to do housework and would split it with me.

We have a to-do board where we list chores, who will do them, and the time it will take. That way, we don’t do the same things, and no one does too much.

My father came over to visit from another state as part of work and was supposed to stay over. He was looking at the board and asked what it was, and when I told him, he said, “You realize it’s not going to last long, right?” I was like, what?

And he said it’s just natural that women want to do all the housework and take care of people, and if I keep pushing it, my boyfriend will leave me. I was like, WTF, and told him the reason my mom left was that he thought that way.

He got defensive and said, “Well, I make the money, so she does the housework.” I pointed out that she worked as well, and he said, “Well, she chose to work; it’s her own fault.”

I was really pissed at that point and told him to leave. He was supposed to stay over, but I said he needed to find a place to stay because he wasn’t coming back.

He left, and I’m upset that he was so disrespectful. He texted later, “Apologizing,” saying he got offended by my comments but that they were harmless and for my best interest.

Generational Perspectives on Gender Roles

Discussions around housework often reveal deep-seated generational beliefs about gender roles.

Research in social psychology suggests that these beliefs can significantly influence family dynamics and individual behaviors.

This scenario illustrates how differing expectations can lead to conflict and resentment within families.

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According to Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a clinical psychologist, "Open discussions about household responsibilities can significantly improve relationships and create a more balanced partnership." Engaging in honest conversations about expectations can foster understanding and cooperation, as noted by Dr. Pepper Schwartz, a sociologist who emphasizes that "clarity in roles and responsibilities is essential for a harmonious home environment." These insights highlight the importance of addressing differing beliefs to achieve a more equitable division of labor in households.

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Fostering Open Communication About Responsibilities

Experts recommend establishing clear agreements about household responsibilities to prevent misunderstandings.

Creating a shared chore chart can help visualize responsibilities and enhance accountability among family members.

Regular family meetings can also provide a platform to revisit these agreements and make necessary adjustments.

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What would you do in this situation? Share your opinion in the comments.

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Psychological Analysis

This situation illustrates the generational tensions that can arise around household responsibilities.

From a psychological perspective, open communication about expectations is key to fostering cooperation and reducing conflict.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, addressing generational beliefs around housework requires open dialogue and mutual respect.

By fostering a culture of shared responsibility, families can enhance their relationships and create a more harmonious living environment.