Reddit Post Title: AITA for kicking out my father over sexist comments about housework?

A 28-year-old woman refused to let her dad’s “women naturally do it all” routine slide, even when he came to stay at her place. And honestly, the whole thing was already doomed the second he saw the chore board.

This wasn’t a random spat in passing. Her father spent her childhood treating housework like it wasn’t his job, vanished to his “man cave” after weekend visits, and only took it seriously after her mom filed for divorce. Now he’s visiting from another state, looking at her to-do board, and casually telling her her boyfriend will leave if she keeps insisting on shared chores.

What followed turned a planned overnight visit into a full-on eviction.

Original Post

My father is a typical guy for his age group. He never lifted a finger to do housework.

I can’t remember him doing housework even once in my childhood memories. My mom and he both worked, and she would do all the housework and childcare.

My brother and I were raised by my mom, and my dad would hang out with us for 1-2 hours on weekends before disappearing to his man cave to watch TV. She complained to him a lot about it when I was younger, and he didn’t take it seriously until she filed for divorce the moment we were off to college.

To this day, he claims she gave him no warning and divorced him out of nowhere. As an adult, I made sure that anyone I dated knew how to do housework and would split it with me.

We have a to-do board where we list chores, who will do them, and the time it will take. That way, we don’t do the same things, and no one does too much.

My father came over to visit from another state as part of work and was supposed to stay over. He was looking at the board and asked what it was, and when I told him, he said, “You realize it’s not going to last long, right?” I was like, what?

And he said it’s just natural that women want to do all the housework and take care of people, and if I keep pushing it, my boyfriend will leave me. I was like, WTF, and told him the reason my mom left was that he thought that way.

He got defensive and said, “Well, I make the money, so she does the housework.” I pointed out that she worked as well, and he said, “Well, she chose to work; it’s her own fault.”

I was really pissed at that point and told him to leave. He was supposed to stay over, but I said he needed to find a place to stay because he wasn’t coming back.

He left, and I’m upset that he was so disrespectful. He texted later, “Apologizing,” saying he got offended by my comments but that they were harmless and for my best interest.

Generational Perspectives on Gender Roles

Discussions around housework often reveal deep-seated generational beliefs about gender roles.

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Right away, her dad clocked the to-do board and made it weird, asking why it “won’t last long,” like the whole system was a temporary phase.

The Reddit thread highlights a pressing issue within familial relationships, particularly regarding household responsibilities.

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Fostering Open Communication About Responsibilities

Creating a shared chore chart can help visualize responsibilities and enhance accountability among family members.

Regular family meetings can also provide a platform to revisit these agreements and make necessary adjustments.

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Then he doubled down, claiming women want to do everything and that her boyfriend would dump her if she kept pushing, because apparently sexism is “just natural.”

What would you do in this situation? Share your opinion in the comments.

This is similar to the argument over splitting the electricity bill with a housemate who never stops leaving lights on, even after being asked.

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When she snapped back with the divorce reason, he tried to justify it with the classic “I make the money, so she does the housework,” even though both parents worked.

The visit ended fast, she told him to find somewhere else to stay, and he later texted “apologizing” while calling it harmless and for her best interest.

The situation detailed in the Reddit post highlights the pressing need for open dialogue surrounding generational beliefs about housework. The father's dismissive attitude toward household responsibilities not only reflects outdated views but also underscores a broader societal issue. The OP's decisive action in kicking him out serves as a potent challenge to these antiquated norms.

By embracing a culture of shared responsibility, families can strengthen their bonds and foster a more harmonious living environment. This incident reveals that such conversations are essential for progress, breaking down barriers that perpetuate inequality within the home.

Now he’s wondering if the real reason he got kicked out was his own attitude, not her “comments.”

For another fairness fight, see who lost it over splitting utility bills despite income gaps.