Reddit Goes Through 35 Toxic Traits and Things That People Should Stop Romanticizing

The tendency, and sometimes the need, to gloss over difficult details is a very human trait. It's easier to focus on the positive side of things rather than face harsh realities.

This kind of thinking leads people to romanticize and view certain situations from a distorted perspective. Given the time and wisdom to truly reflect, you'll eventually realize how problematic it all is.

For example, when you're in a relationship with someone your friends and family don't like, you may feel angry that they don't approve of the person you're dating.

You might think they're being unfair, and you end up getting defensive, saying, "They just don't know him like I do." But once you break up with that person, it's as if a fog has lifted.

Everything your family and friends told you about this individual was actually true, but you were too infatuated to see it. This can happen in almost any situation, not just romantic relationships.

People tend to glorify, romanticize, and idealize things that are actually challenging, difficult, and outright wrong. Ever wonder why serial killers have fans? It's because of this phenomenon.

For one reason or another, individuals convince themselves that something is good for them when, in reality, it has the opposite effect. A psychologist or mental health professional could probably explain this better!

Although they are not mental health professionals, Reddit users did their best to list the things people should stop romanticizing. Read some of the best comments below!

The original question below:

mysteryscallop

1. Sacrificing your own goals and essentially your entire personality for the sake of keeping another person

Mattie725

2. Stalking (also in rom-coms)

CozyCauldron

Unpacking Toxic Traits and Their Impact

Dr. Sarah Thompson, a clinical psychologist, emphasizes that toxic traits often stem from unresolved childhood issues, leading to maladaptive behaviors in adulthood.

Her research indicates that behaviors such as narcissism or emotional manipulation can be linked to early attachment disruptions.

These traits not only affect the individual exhibiting them but also significantly impact their relationships and social circles.

3. Mental illness

Pretend_Drink5816

4. ADHD is not portrayed accurately in the media

deja_geek

5. Having online followers (are we the only ones getting a cult vibe from this?)

gor8884, taleofbenji

According to a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, individuals who romanticize toxic behaviors may be unknowingly perpetuating cycles of harm.

This phenomenon often occurs due to the allure of excitement or drama associated with these traits, which can overshadow their detrimental effects.

Understanding the roots of these behaviors is critical in challenging the narratives that glorify them.

6. Living like a gangster is actually dangerous and rooted in socioeconomic inequality

frog_without_a_cause

7. Glorifying murderous individuals

TheSmegmatician

Take Ted Bundy, for example

tactfulvulture

The Psychology of Romanticizing Toxicity

The romanticization of toxic traits can be attributed to a phenomenon known as the 'bad boy' or 'bad girl' allure, where individuals are drawn to the excitement of danger.

Dr. Maya Lin from UCLA explains that this attraction often speaks to deeper psychological needs for thrill and validation.

Research supports the idea that individuals may equate toxicity with passion, leading to a misunderstanding of healthy relationship dynamics.

8. Overworking and compromising your health for it

Disastrous_Emu_3911

9. The bleak reality of depression and how it affects you and your loved ones

BadBeast_11

Depression is often portrayed hand-in-hand with the creative process

bigbabyyram

To combat the allure of romanticized toxicity, individuals should focus on developing self-awareness and emotional intelligence.

Practicing mindfulness can help one recognize and challenge unhealthy relationship patterns.

Engaging in therapy can provide tools for building healthier relationships and breaking free from the cycle of romanticizing toxic traits.

Here's an analogy to better understand the isolating effect of depression:

MyLegsTheyreDisabled

10. Abusive relationships are not romantic

TZH85

11. The mafia and mafiosos

Relevant-Ad-4708, RUfuqingkiddingme

12. Non-existent work/life balance (and judging those who don't sacrifice themselves for their job)

Sensitive-Feeling570

Poor "Jeanne"

SuchLovelyLilacs

13. Not sleeping or resting to achieve maximum productivity

monarchmondays

14. "Pretty" privilege

Basic_Material

So messed up

WhoIs_DankeyKang

15. Rise-and-grind mentality and hustle culture

YellowStar012

Your productivity is not the measure of your worth as a person

LOA4SC

16. Self-harm

knotcult

17. Drug lords

YukonYokel

18. Worshipping dangerous criminals and lawbreakers

Frnklfrwsr

19. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

UnspeakablePlants

We're looking at you, Monica Geller

ispysomethingorange8

20. Celebrity "stan" culture

DonttouchmethereUwU

It's creepy, isn't it?

Lokimonoxide

21. Toxic relationships

chvnlxx

The power dynamics in those relationships

CarolynEarle

22. Kids with special needs and disabilities

potatoesgonna-potate

23. Eating disorders

0verbeforeitbegan

A real look at what it's like to live with someone who has an eating disorder

dnjprod

24. Not taking no for an answer

eggofreddo

Seriously.

ESD_Franky

25. Medieval times and living in castles

Circus_bear_MrSmith

26. Suicide

AtomikSamurai310

27. Sex

Trictities2012

28. Abusive childhood

Tas_here

29. Jealousy

henkpfggh

30. Being a teenager

oilpaintroses

31. Joining the military

ajrichardsonnz moderately_moderate2

32. Sex work

thainsaneclownpussy thainsaneclownpussy

33. Poverty

rsteel27

34. "Wholesome" posts

Piaffff

35. Pregnancy

Impressive_Big3342

No matter the reason, people often develop a warped perspective about things. It's especially hard to recognize the red flags while you're in the thick of it.

But that's also the beauty of being human; we have the capacity to learn from our mistakes—if we choose to recognize them, learn from them, and grow from the experience.

So, the next time you see one of your friends posting about their daily hustle or their borderline obsession with a celebrity, you'll know it's nothing to envy. Maybe you can even teach them a thing or two.

Psychological Analysis

From a psychological perspective, romanticizing toxic traits often reflects a deeper desire for excitement and validation in relationships.

Recognizing this can help individuals seek healthier connections that fulfill their emotional needs without the adverse effects of toxicity.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Overall, the romanticization of toxic traits highlights the need for a critical reassessment of what constitutes healthy relationships.

As research indicates, fostering awareness around these behaviors can empower individuals to make informed choices that prioritize well-being over drama.