Roommate Uses My Espresso Machine Without Asking - AITA for Refusing Equal Rent Split?

Some people don’t recognize a favor, they just keep taking. In this case, it’s a roommate situation that started with “we’re splitting everything” and quickly turned into one guy watching his prized espresso machine get treated like shared property.

A 28-year-old man moved in with his 27-year-old roommate, thinking rent and expenses would be the only thing they truly had to negotiate. But his morning routine is now a battlefield, because she’s been using his espresso machine without asking, burning through his expensive coffee beans, leaving a mess, and never cleaning or refilling anything.

What makes it messy is that he offered a compromise, and she responded with the classic “roommates share everything equally” argument, even though the machine was his, bought with his own money.

Original Post

So I'm (28M) and I recently moved in with my roommate (27F) to split rent and expenses. Quick context: I have this awesome espresso machine that I bought with my own money, and it's my pride and joy.

I use it every morning to make my coffee just the way I like it. The issue is, my roommate has been helping herself to my espresso machine without asking.

She uses up my expensive coffee beans, leaves a mess behind, and doesn't even bother cleaning up or refilling anything. It's really starting to annoy me because it feels like she's taking advantage of my stuff.

I brought it up with her politely, asking her to please not use my things without permission and offering to show her how to use it properly if she wants. But she got defensive, saying we're roommates and should share everything equally, including my espresso machine.

I get where she's coming from, but this is something I bought with my own money, and I take good care of it. I don't mind sharing, but I want it to be on my terms.

So I told her that if she wants to use it, she should contribute to buying the coffee beans and maybe take turns cleaning it. She got upset and said I was being selfish, that we're supposed to split everything equally, and I can't just pick and choose what I share.

I feel like she's not respecting my boundaries and taking advantage of my generosity. So AITA?

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He tries to handle it politely at first, asking the roommate to stop using his espresso machine without permission and even offering to show her how to use it right.

This reminds me of roommates who neglected a cat, and the narrator who secretly rehomed it.

Then she gets defensive, basically claiming that because they live together, his machine and his coffee beans should be fair game.

That’s when he draws a line, saying if she wants to use it, she should chip in for beans and take turns cleaning up after herself.

And just like that, she calls him selfish, turning his specific boundary about his own purchase into a “you can’t pick and choose” fight.

What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments.

Nobody wants to be the only one paying for the coffee, cleaning the mess, and pretending it’s “equal.”

Want more roommate-level chaos, read about friends who issued a cat declaw ultimatum over a husband’s allergy.